Why Being An Adult Sucks Sometimes

Don't get me wrong, being one of these fully-grown-adults can be fairly amazing at times. You get to vote, you get to travel without your parents breathing down your neck, you get to do pretty much anything you want at any time, and you get to drink alcohol (no underage drinking here, please). But there are times when I'll openly admit that I would rather jump into the ol' time machine and go back a decade or so to...simpler times.

Here is my comprehensive list of why being an adult can sometimes be a bit of a hassle:

1. Time

We are all aware of the concept of time; you either have it or you don't. I mention time here because I'm noticing as I'm getting older more and more that I have definitively have less time to spend on things I enjoy, like socialising and nonchalantly drinking lattes in cafes and lying on my bed reading a good novel. Adults have jobs, research, meetings, and, in my case as an expat living in South Korea, regularly scheduled video-chat dates with family. I don't hate what I do by any means, and it nice to be filling my time a tad more productively than my uni days, but I miss having so much freedom to do what I want. The next point is linked to time slightly and it's...

2. Matching Schedules With Friends

As I grow, like a slightly bent over and browning sunflower, I am observing that it is getting increasingly near IMPOSSIBLE to make even simple plans with friends. This is due to myself having all these miscellaneous things to do, but my friends also (selfishly) having a completely different list of other miscellaneous things to do! Gone are the days in university where I could drop a message in my shared-house group chat asking "anyone around?" at ANY time of the day and there would always be someone to talk to over a cuppa or go for a walk with. Life was so much simpler.

Planning my birthday party this year with 10 people has been like planning an expedition to Mars and I wish I was exaggerating. Finding timeslots that accommodate both mine and my friend's agendas is just out of the question most days. With some friends it's so difficult that after 15 minutes of non-stop messaging and mind-numbing negotiation we simply give up with a slightly gloomy "let's try again next month". It's nauseating to even consider the task.  

3. The Never-ending Responsibilties

If someone had told me the sheer amount of trivial rubbish I would have to be responsible for as an adult human when I was a mere egg in my mother's womb, I may have made the conscious effort to dodge out of the way of the approaching sperm. It's harrowing the amount of things you have to do and even just think about once you turn 18. Parents will often retort when teenagers complain about this like "oh don't worry, you'll get used to it after a while and it'll become routine, just wait until you're older". To those adults I say, HOW LONG DO I HAVE TO WAIT? Because I'm turning a ripe 24 years of age next month and I still have no idea how to sort out my taxes without scrambling for the assistance of someone older than I. When will this waiting end and when will I be appropriately ADJUSTED to this coveted "adult way of life"? If you could let me know, that would be stellar, thanks.

4. Changes In Opinion

While this isn't strictly a negative thing, I wanted to include it as I find it rather interesting and have noticed a lot of instances of this changed behaviour in my more recent years of existence. The other day I was watching a clip on instagram of a cartoon I adored watching while growing up, Tom and Jerry. As a child I would always support Jerry (the mouse) of course, as he was more fun and did cool things like blow things up and he was just such a hoot! But, as my now-at-least-14-years-older-eyes were watching this clip I noticed this slight pang of something sturring in my chest as I saw poor Tom being aggressively beaten down and belittled- sympathy. Feeling sad about Jerry's treatment of Tom as a child was the equivalent of being a child that actively loved all green vegetables and despised all forms of sugar. Obviously, it just never happened. And if you, reader, are now sheepishly thinking "well I did love broccoli as a child and fruit jelly was a bit gross for me..." you're wrong. Rethink your past, okay? A child does not have the emotional capacity to feel sorry for Tom.

But realising that I now do indeed sympathise for this poor nonexistent Tomcat, willingly or not, made me aware of the fact that I have officially lost what I will refer to as my "child glasses". Not the best name, but it's a work in progress. Child glasses are of course, metaphorical, and they refer to how a young child's perception of any media can be clouded and more easily disassociated with negative feelings. These feelings may be felt by some children but they will be small, and are more often replaced with confusion or humour by most. The fact that I was watching this Tom and Jerry snippet and couldn't stop wincing at how much it would actually upset me if an annoying mouse kept ruining my date with a potential suitor by blowing up my fork every 5 seconds, proves I have removed and essentially smashed my "child glasses" underfoot. Jerry is now to me just, like most things in my adult life, an unending nuisance.

5. Justice

I am a caucasian female who was raised in England. I have been incredibly lucky with this lottery we call life and was born into an existence that would offer me endless opportunities and freedoms. For some, this is less true.

If I were born a Person of Colour in America I would be 3 times more likely to be killed by police in my home country than a fellow white American. 8 out of 100 of the largest city police departments kill black men at higher rates than the US murder rate (including Orlando, Oklahoma City, Phoenix and Las Vegas). 99% of killings of citizens by police between 2013-2019 concluded with a result of no conviction for those responsible. The numbers are staggering and just horrifying to comprehend.

But these are truthes we must face and all address to make change.

Now, more than ever, we are growing increasingly aware of the situations that are affecting the many injustices that exist in our current World. We are exposing slowly how corrupt and beneficiary to white supremacy our current institutions are and are actively making efforts to stand together to disable and reform these systems.

If you are reading this and have not yet contributed to the BLM movement in any way, please stop to do some research as to how you can make an impact; even seemingly small things like signing a petition or educating yourself or others with readily available materials online can make a world of difference. We can and we MUST do better.

Thank you

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I am in the process of writing a very detailed and heavy critique of modern democracy, so this piece was something I churned out in effort to lighten my heart a little bit. A lot of the research I've been doing for the piece has been very difficult to digest. But publishing a piece that completely ignores the gravity of the BLM movement felt wrong, so this is a very small contribution to that which I hope will make even a slight difference to at least one person. Have a great day everyone :)