What Are Trying to Tell You the Emotions You Stop Every Time

Your effort to change your emotions is like trying to reach your destination, completely ignoring the traffic signs that tell you which way to go.

Emotional intelligence is not the ability to avoid negative emotions, due to a developed discipline and the wisdom gained. This is not the ability to control your thoughts and not to fall under their influence or to respond calmly to any situation you encounter.

True emotional intelligence is the ability to experience emotions in their integrity. That's all. No matter what happens. You just have to be more discriminating with the help you render toward other people.

Have you ever experienced joy for more than a few minutes? What about anger? Not? How about emotions that reflect tension, depression, and sadness? They lasted longer, didn't they? Weeks, months, and years, right?

Because these are not emotions. These are symptoms. And let's deal with their causes.

You should know that suffering is simply a refusal to accept what is real. That's all. Therefore, to heal from this, you just have to accept the current situation and fully experience all the emotions that you will experience afterward.

This will allow you to bring to the surface the psychological traumas, the humiliation experienced, the loss. This will allow you to survive those emotions that you should have experienced in the realization of unpleasant circumstances. This will allow your conscience to process what needed to be suppressed in time to move on or maybe even survive.

You are afraid that your emotions will be too strong, especially when you experience them. You have been taught not to love too much so as not to feel pain. You have been taught not to be too smart, not to become the object of ridicule, and not to be too shy not to become vulnerable.

Eventually, you were taught to experience only those emotions that would not cause discomfort to others. As a child, you were often punished because your emotional experiences bothered your parents.

Therefore, it is not surprising that you react in this way to similar events.

In reality, it is not about you or the fact that you are afraid of strong emotions. These are people who call you crazy, emotional, and wrong. People who don't know how to relate to that, who want to stay where you are. People who want you to be insensitive.

It's not about you. Do you know how I know that?

Because your insensitivity isn't really like that. On the contrary, it is a simultaneous experience of all the emotions that you have not learned to process at once.

Insensitivity is not something neutral. Insensitivity is all of a sudden.

Because your sadness indicates that you still can't get something out of your head. And guilt tells you, "People think you've done something wrong," and shame tells you, "People think you're wrong."

Your anxiety means that you are trying to resist the development of events, this is your last attempt to maintain control, and you are beginning to realize this more clearly.

Feeling tired is the resistance to who you want to be, to who you are.

Your anger - is suppressed by anger.

Depression - is all that comes to the surface, and you are screaming to get rid of it.

And you conclude that you can no longer continue in the same spirit that you are missing something important, that you feel stuck and lost and you understand that you should not be afraid of your emotions and try to change them. You just have to learn to trust them and understand what they are trying to tell you.

So, the idea is not to try to change your emotions. It's about listening to yourself. Not just accepting your emotions, but exploring them to the extent that you don't understand what they're trying to tell you. It's a matter of being able to communicate with yourself.

Every emotion is worth it. Do you feel so sad that you try to change all your emotions? Or do you think that these can be divided into right and wrong, good and bad, the ones you should have and the ones you should avoid? This comes from the fact that you are afraid to tell yourself what you do not want to hear.

The emotions you suppress most often are the most important avenues for self-knowledge. Your desire to listen to you is simply your fear.

This is the fear of being visible, bad, or just different from those people who shape public opinion.

If you put the opinions of the people around you above you, then you embark on a long journey of fighting your instincts to combine with the selfish needs of other people. At the same time, that life in which you could listen to yourself, trust yourself, perceive, feel and experience… will always elude you.

Sadness doesn't kill you, and neither does depression. But you have to constantly fight with your emotions. You will ignore, avoid and deny them - your unexpressed emotions will suffocate you.

Therefore, you have a choice: either you allow yourself to feel everything, or you are deceived, completely devoid of any emotions. You cannot choose the emotions you will experience. Either you surrender to them or you begin to resist them. In the end, the choice is yours.