Unmissed Opportunity

Tim, a friend of mine, constantly asks me out and so far I have always refused. He’s very handsome, athletic, tan, blonde and puppy brown eyes, all the stuff you’re usually looking for. For whatever reason I just wasn’t that interested.

We were both lifeguards at our local swimming pool along with a few other friends our age. The other girls were always hitting on him but no one had been able to break through that shell, which made them pretty much hate me. Whatever.

Well, later in the summer I caught strep throat (which I later found out) and we were working at the pool. I was running a fairly high fever and felt like shit, shivering in 90 degree weather. Tim walks over and starts chatting with me and again, asks me out. I was so tired of hearing it and had no energy to refuse so I broke down and agreed.

I was dreading it, again, not sure why but I guess sometimes people just aren’t your type.

He asked if it would be okay if we went on a double-date with each of our best friends. My friend Susie and I had been inseparable since 1st grade and his friend Troy and him the same. Susie and I had never met Troy yet but she was also a fellow lifeguard. And also in love with Tim. Even though he had asked me out, she knew I wasn’t interested and was happy to have an opportunity to hang out with him and maybe get an edge on the other girls. Double-date on.

The day finally arrived and we went to a local pub that not only had a great beer selection but a delicious menu. One of those places people regret when they move somewhere that has nothing like that anywhere near them.

Susie and I met them there and Tim was handsome as ever. He looked nervous, which made me feel kind of bad for agreeing to this – I was leading him on and that was never my intention, I just gave up like a million exhausted parents, finally caving and let their screaming toddler eat ice cream for dinner.

With him was his friend Troy, dark hair, big blue eyes and one hell of a shit grin. Not so much the trouble-maker grin but more of a ‘he makes fun out of any situation’ grin. His face lit up when he smiled and he had that twinkle in his eye that made you immediately pay attention. He was dressed casually but I wasn’t sure if it was because he was just being himself or the fact that he had a broken collarbone which pretty much limited him in the selection of shirts that can accompany a shoulder brace. Tim introduced us and we sat across from them in our booth.

Other than the great beer menu they also had craft cocktails and I ordered an Old Fashioned, my favorite. I know they are expensive but I intended to pay my own bill because I didn’t want to feel obligated for anything after this date and plus, I didn’t want to feel like I was ordering the most expensive things on Tim’s dime. Susie ordered her usual light beer with green olives in it (yes, that’s a thing), Tim did the same, and then Troy looked at me and said to the waitress “I’ll have what she’s having.” I grinned – I don’t think I had ever met anyone that would drink that, especially considering the price tag. You only live once.

We made small talk, enjoyed a delicious meal and more drinks and then Tim said that he a surprise planned for us all. With that we rode in Tim’s convertible with the top down about ten miles away to a small pond with a boat tied to the dock, no houses, kids, people in general, in sight. Very isolated and serene. It was very pretty and a calm day. At this point Troy and I were chatting away like we had known each other our whole lives and in general just having a great time. I was trying not to be too obvious because I knew Tim was really making an effort, he had asked me out for months and finally got a yes so I knew this was a big deal for him. On top that it turned out that Troy was kind of supposed to be Susie’s blind date, although she spent most of her time ogling Tim.

We got out of the car, got in the boat and Tim rowed us out onto the pond. He had stashed a few bottles of Merlot under one of the benches and handed each of us a glass. “Cheers to old and new friends!” he said and we clinked glasses and took a big sip. That glass of Merlot was amazing. He said that his uncle had made it and he could get more at any time. I thought that was pretty impressive to be honest. I could see drinking both of those bottles by myself if no one was around. And now I know where to get it.

We were really enjoying ourselves, laughing, telling childhood stories, you know, general first date conversation. Then it started to rain.

Tim started to panic – he had left the roof down on his convertible and started frantically trying to row back to shore. Susie started freaking out because her hair was getting wet and Troy and I started laughing uncontrollably. It was rude, I know, but what are you going to do? There were only two oars so Tim was on his own and as for Susie, I’m sorry ladies, your hair can’t laugh at the weather (stole that from Final Net for those of you who were born after the 80s).

We get back to shore and Tim is completely livid. Susie is almost in tears and Troy and I are doing our best to not keep laughing – you know how it is, once you start you can’t stop.

We drove back to the restaurant to get Susie’s car, said our “thanks for the lovely afternoon”, apologies for laughing at Tim and Susie’s reaction to the rain and the not so subtle ending to the date, and parted ways.

The next time I saw Tim was at the pool at work again. He obviously got the message that I really wasn’t interested and pretty much just blew me off. I felt bad, I should have never gone on that date, but I got three great side effects out of it: Tim not constantly asking me out anymore, excellent local wine, and Troy.

Once I knew Tim was over it, I took a leap and asked Troy if he would like to come over for dinner and drinks. I’m a terrible cook but when you drink Old Fashioned cocktails, scrimping somewhere else is kind of a necessary balance. I wanted him to get to know me by seeing how I live. He said yes!

I know it’s not the most romantic meal, just one of the few things I had made that was edible, so we had meatloaf. It was terrible. Dry, burnt on the outside and WAY too salty. He politely ate it, raved about every bite and gave it a 5-star review. Now I know he’s a great liar as well. I loved it.

So here’s a little secret about myself: I LOVE Barnum’s animal crackers. I go through boxes and boxes of them. I didn’t really have any dessert recipes in my arsenal so embarrassingly cleaned up our dinner and presented him with said crackers for ‘dessert’.

He again ‘loved’ it, or at least said he did, those big blue eyes twinkling and that gorgeous shit grin plastered all over his face.

Things were perfect for a while but we eventually parted ways amicably due to college and job changes and loosely stayed in touch. Years later we had both married and had children and hadn’t spoken for a very, very long time. Then I joined FaceBook. Many of our mutual friends were already on there, I had fought joining for a while, thinking it was probably not a good idea but eventually gave it a shot. So much fun re-connecting with old friends and family and sharing with new ones! And then a friend suggestion came up: it was Troy. I hesitated. I didn’t want to come off as creepy or put my own relationship in any kind of jeopardy but I knew Troy – he wouldn’t jump to conclusions or be creepy either. We had ended things on friendly terms so I hit ‘Add Friend’ and held my breath, kind of panicking that maybe I had made a bad decision.

A few days later he accepted. I looked at photos of his kids and wife, his farm and all the hard work he had done over the years. I realized that I wasn’t really reminiscing an old boyfriend but a good solid friend. Someone you can trust. Someone who is innately a good person. Someone you could call right now and they would hop on an airplane to help you out when you needed it. I would’ve done that for him as well. We had one of those strange but strong bonds. And it all started over a collapsed first date and a box of crackers.

His birthday came up a few months later and I posted on his wall “Happy Birthday old friend, I hope you have a blast ”

He eventually responded a few days later, farmers aren’t exactly sitting around with time on their hands to surf, and wrote: “I had my favorite birthday dessert, same as I do every year, Barnum’s animal crackers.”