Tooth Fairies Don't Cry

I tear up a lot out of anger or frustration of being misunderstood... but the last time I really cried was a while ago. I don't remember the exact day. I just remember why.

Growing up, Dad fed me this idea that if I lived with him, I would have never gone through any of what I did. He had me convinced he would have been a great father who would have loved me.

My whole life, I clung to that illusion.. and ultimately did move in with him only to find out that the savior he promised didn't exist. There was only the man who belittled me and compared me to my sister. Every mistake I made in his eyes was a weapon for him and proof of my failure. Every day, I had to hear about how I should be more like my sister because she has so much money and is doing so great.

To him, my worth is tied to money or success. When I wrote my first book, hoping I'd finally earn his love, he shattered me by saying, "It's alright, I guess. It's a book."

After I moved out, he admitted he'd forgotten about me. I'd just 'slipped under the radar' because my sisters drug addiction mattered more than my existence.

I realized no amount of bleeding myself dry would ever be enough. He'd never love me. I was chasing something that was never there and never would be.

The last time I laughed was on Halloween. I'm a makeup artist... who loves horror. As a last minute costume, I decided I'd go as the Tooth Fairy. But I'd turn it into grotesque and unique horror. My costume was pink and girly and I was covered in pretty sparkles.... paired with a gaping hole in my face that had teeth embedded within.

I took my kids trick-r-treating, expecting to just fade into the background while they gathered their loot. Instead, everyone went crazy for it. People complimented how unique and terrifying I looked and adults kept handing me candy for putting in the effort. I was standing there in my horrific makeup, feeling incredibly flattered.

The kids were having a blast, collecting lots of treats. At the next house, a little girl was sitting out on the front porch, snacking on a giant bowl of sweets and talking about how much she loved Halloween. Standing right next to her, her mom decided to take advantage of the moment to drop a classic parenting lesson.

"You’d better brush really good tonight, or all that sugar is going to give you cavities," she told her kid.

The kid replied, "That’s okay... the tooth fairy will come visit."

The timing could not have been more perfect if we had rehearsed it. There I was, a gory, horrific monster of a tooth fairy standing in front of her.

That poor little girl froze. She dropped her candy into the bowl and she hid behind her mom. She was staring at me on her porch and trying to figure out what kind of monster I was supposed to be.

That was when her mom pointed straight at me and said, "Look, there she is right now."

The girl promised her mom she'd brush really good after all.

Her mom and I shared a pretty good laugh about it, and I was glad I didn't upset the parents by scaring their child. I also got another handful of candy, and it turned out to be the funniest moment of the whole night.

Here is a photo of the tooth fairy costume in question. Remember to always brush your teeth, Kiddos!