The Sleeping Beauty in a tormented world

A long time ago, when I was still young and restless, as a student in an old-fashioned private school, I struggled particularly with one of its rules. It harshly stipulated that "all lights must be turned off in the dormitories at 9:30 pm". I couldn't disagree more. I thought that it was such a stupid rule for a young person - and honestly, I still believe that!!! Come on, seriously?

However, now at 40+ (when I already classify myself among the older people), I can't think of something else better than going to sleep at 9:30 pm. I'd love to enjoy a long, sweet, undisturbed sleep till late in the morning. Unfortunately, no matter how much I wish that to happen, that's not my case - or at least it wasn't in 2021.

But, hey, we're in 2022 now. Since it's a new beginning of the year, I've diligently started to work on my resolutions. This time I didn't do it in December. I've changed the approach with a wiser strategy in mind that I'd start later for giving my actions a chance to last longer.

Between all the chapters that I'd put on my list, yes, you're right to choose this topic, too. Sleeping is for sure one of the areas that I must address. Why? Because the truth is, in 2021, almost all my nights were really awful.

How comes? Well, for example, out of 365 nights, in only one I can recall a nice, sweet dream. That single notable night, I dreamt that Gerard Butler was a very good friend. He was explaining to me passionately, with the best Scottish accent possible, how to pilot a helicopter. You need to know that I always wanted to ride with a helicopter, which has never happened so far. (I refrain from commenting here if I ever wanted to be a friend of Gerard Butler or not!) Fact is, I woke up with a large smile while the loud noise of the helicopter was still in my ears. It made my day!

The rest of the nights were mostly filled with nightmares or seemed as short as only five minutes of rest. I was awake many times at 2 am, 3 am, 4 am, 5 am, very tired to enjoy most activities during the days. Slowly my smile disappeared from my face until it turned into a long, inexpressive, terribly bored one. I couldn't recognise myself anymore looking in the mirror. Yep, that's exactly how it happened.

Like many others facing insomnia, who get dozens and thousands of advice on how to fight against it, I've started to apply one remedy after another. But how on earth can you succeed when life bombards you constantly with so many serious reasons to lose your inner peace and tranquillity? As soon as one reason goes (IF it goes), another replaces it immediately. I don't know how was your life in 2021, but mine was many times like breathing poorly too little air while swimming in a stormy sea of worries and problems. Used to have things under control and find solutions to problems, I struggled to overcome and win, again, and again, and again - only to realise I was defeated. Attached to this grey context, the sleep issue only got worse.

Towards the end of the year, something got better, though - I realised that my body was starting to adapt to the new routine, and I didn't feel so tired anymore. However, I still didn't know how to sort out my sleep issue, driving so far away from normality.

Then some electrifying thoughts popped into my mind. 'What if this is going to be the reality from now on, with small variations of ups and downs? What if I'd accept it and embrace it instead of fighting against it? What if I also let go and stop trying to get the situations and my problems under control?’

Let's pause for a second and be honest - how many of us go through the same situation right now and, like it or not, will face this in 2022? Therefore, why not turn this specific critical issue into an opportunity?

To make it clearer: This January started again with a severe problem; out of habit, I quickly got in the fight position to confront it. Then suddenly, I've figured out that I was reaching a dangerous level of stress in that combat mode, and I've decided to change the tactic. Who am I? I'm only a human being; some situations are simply out of my reach and control, and I must let them take their course. I'm going to do my part as a human being as much as possible. But I'll stop where my limit is and trust that, since everything is under perfect control in this vast Universe, they’ll be sorted out to the best.

Thus, if I choose to start from this shifting of the perspective writing the resolutions on the Sleeping chapter for 2022, I may end up with something completely different and somehow revolutionary, such as:

1. PREPARING TO FALL ASLEEP

Start every night expecting that it'll be a short one - so get the best out of it! Translated into practical steps, that would mean:

- prepare mentally for a pleasant experience, even if you know that it may turn into a challenge during the night - face it from a different positive angle, constructively!

- try to go to sleep no later than 9:30 pm (that’s right, as per that odd rule of that school - why not give it a try?)

- remember something remarkable or at least nice that happened during the day. If that's not going to be the case, think of a song you like, of a picture, a person you love or care for, or of something funny.

- don't accept into your mind the negative things; cling only to the shiny ones.

- imagine yourself floating, beautiful and free (not like that ugly, serious, dull creature you saw in the mirror all along 2021, OK?)

Eventually, you’ll fall asleep - finally!

Sweet dreams, baby!

Wait for a second: I can’t promise you’ll have this year at least one special dream, one of those that would make you smile to the ears and back, feel hopeful or inspire you with courage. But you know what? Even if that’s not going to happen, that’s OK, too. Don’t give up believing that good, even extraordinary things can happen while being perfectly awake. It's much better if you allow reality to surprise you, isn't it?

2. WAKING UP

- and what if a nightmare comes again? Well, it's not going to last forever; you'll wake up. Just breathe, breathe, breathe, and reject the memories of the dream. Instead, be grateful you're alive; you're here and not there on that other horrid planet. Keep saying to yourself: ‘It’s OK, and it’s going to be fine! That was just a lie.' Start thinking again of something you love, care about, something beautiful and precious to you, tangible, and genuine.

- if you wake up and turn into an owl, accept it as your mission for that night, and do something constructive about it: read something interesting, write something creative or text an old friend, do a drawing or sketch you always postponed to do, work on something you always wanted and never had the time to, meditate, pray, etc. - whatever makes you connect with the real YOU. Use that precious time of complete silence and peace not to be disappointed and upset, but turn it into a special moment, dedicated just for you.

3. STARTING THE DAY

Last year something unusual captured my attention. A guy, a young widow, raising on his own a seven years old boy, wrote about his daily routine something like that: 'I wake up every day smiling.' ‘Wow’, I said, ‘that’s awesome. How can I do that, too?’ Somehow I couldn’t forget about the experience of that guy.

- then, put this into practice: when you wake up, think immediately about something to make you smile.

- stretch like a lazy cat for a bit (which means making sure that your alarm clock is set up to allow that!)

- picture into your mind that it's going to be a good day (no matter the fog or another type of miserable weather showing on your window outside).

- get up having a bit of fun: with a silly song, or a poem, or dancing, or acting, or whatever makes you feel good or like a playful kid. Enjoy being YOU.

How about that for a change? Would you (and especially the members of the 2021 Insomnia Club) like to join me in trying this in 2022?

I don't know what the future may bring to us this year, but please, let's have joy, hope, courage, optimism, a piece of sweet cake and a sweet dream every single day and night of it. I - you - all of us deserve it.

Oh no, it’s midnight, not again; I must go to sleep right now!!!

Have a good night, guys, sweet dreams, and see you tomorrow.

It's going to be a fabulous day!