The Existing Types of Jealousy - And Not All Related to Relationships

Jealousy, that "green-eyed monster" is a normal emotion, learned right from childhood, coming directly from the primary instincts - it gives the person an alarm signal when what is rightfully his can be stolen (!), But there are types and types of jealousy - and not all of them related to relationships.

It is difficult to talk about jealousy and types of jealousy because it is an extremely complex emotion - it includes fear, anger, insecurity, pain and this emotion gives rise to various manifestations - aggression, indifference, emotional distance, the constant need for reassurance, obsessive checks…

Jealousy, therefore, is manifested from birth - the baby sees everything in his mother and when her attention is redirected to another source than him, the baby feels the irrational fear of losing his mother, so to lose everything - and adopts different attention-grabbing behaviors. Later, an adult who feels jealousy will fall prey to the same irrational fear - which, however, he can now manage, more or less effectively.

The types of jealousy are strictly related to its causes - so it is good for everyone to know them, and then recognize the emotion in itself, distinguish its root and try to control it. Not every emotion of jealousy comes from romantic relationships, as we shall see.

Types of jealousy:

Professional jealousy. This type of jealousy is born when a person working in a competitive environment notices that someone else gets more appreciation from the boss, promotions, more interesting tasks. That other person is unjustly stealing his merits - at least that's what emotion says, though reason may say otherwise.

This emotion is born of the idea that if someone else gets what you want, if someone else is successful, you won't get enough - in other words, that you can't all be successful, but only one… These ideas and emotions are I give birth in extremely competitive environments and for people who live in fear (conscious or not) that no matter how hard they work, they do not deserve to get what they want.

The jealousy between friends. It's not about envy - when you envy a friend because you want to have what he has, but a type of jealousy quite similar to romantic jealousy. When a friend makes another friend, jealousy appears - irrational emotion aroused by the fear that the friend will replace you in his life.

Jealousy in the family. Classic types of jealousy that deserve extensive study: jealousy between siblings - aroused by instinctual competition for the mother's attention and affection; but there are other more subtle types of jealousy in the family; that of the father for a child - aroused by the fact that the man feels, with the appearance of a new member, who changes the couple's relationship, that he loses his girlfriend, who pays attention only to the role of mother; but sometimes there is also the mother's jealousy for a child, more precisely his daughter - when she is the "father's daughter", pampered and loved as she is not (she intertwines with envy - the mother wants to become young again as her daughter ).

But these are subtle and irrational emotions, emotions that to the civilized person seem "out of place", so they are carefully controlled and repressed.

Romantic jealousy. Which is by far the most discussed and intense type of jealousy in human beings. Although it is said that both women and men are jealous because they may be cheated on by their partner - he would have sex with someone else, this is not the first basis of romantic jealousy. In fact, for both women and men, jealousy is aroused by possible emotional infidelity and not sexual infidelity!

In other words, you are more afraid not that the other person will have sex with someone else, but that the other person will not fall in love with someone else, will not find someone else with whom to communicate, with whom to get along, with whom to share their emotions… But romantic jealousy is such a complex emotion that it can be divided into subtypes.

Types of romantic jealousy - the typology is useful because it is created depending on what arouses the emotion:

Jealousy - fear. Many times, a jealous person in a couple feels this irrational emotion coming from an intense fear - conscious or not. Fear of being abandoned, of losing what you have, of losing the person next to you.

The idea that the relationship can end at any time dominates her. This type of jealousy often manifests itself with virtually no evidence - without the partner showing signs of wanting to end the relationship. But fear, fear is hard to control. This inner fear is often born from an experience, in which the person lost - practically or only symbolically - someone important in his life (when a close person died, went to another locality, or when he simply stopped relationships).

Jealousy - lack of self-confidence. Another face of romantic jealousy is born due to the jealous person's lack of self-confidence, a negative self-image. When the person thinks that every day he can be abandoned or that his partner can be stolen by someone better, more attractive, more desirable.

These ideas are born when the person is not considered good enough for the couple's partner. But sometimes this negative self-image is overshadowed by anger and masked by outbursts of superiority (you've probably heard of the famous inferiority complex masked by a superiority complex - the jealous person who deeply thinks he doesn't deserve his partner, still behaves -a superior way, meant to dominate the other, to keep him close to her).

Jealousy - power and control. Sometimes, however, a person feels jealous because he simply needs to feel in control, strong, to dominate. He feels the need to show that the couple's partner is his only - as an object - and that he has the power in the couple.

And then, whenever he feels threatened - inside the couple or outside - he often snorts aggressively to keep what is his - the couple's partner and power.

The truth is that most of the time these three types of romantic jealousy are intertwined - namely, fear can be logically combined with a negative self-image, which can lead to feelings of anger, which can lead to a need for control. … That's why jealousy is such a complex emotion.

Jealousy - between normal and pathological:

Finally, one cannot forget an important typology of jealousy, which distinguishes between different normal forms and pathological forms.

Normal and grounded jealousy. Emotion can be considered normal and even rationally motivated when, indeed, there is practical evidence that a relationship is threatened: when a partner realizes that he is cheating, when he witnesses another person flirting with his partner, etc. It is, therefore, a real threat.

Illusory jealousy. Although still normal, this is an irrational form of jealousy, with no real basis. It is aroused by those instinctive impulses that have been discussed. Although there is no real threat, the person imagines that his relationship may be in danger and often feels the sting of the green-eyed monster.

However, although irrational, precisely because it is an emotion, this type of jealousy remains normal as long as its manifestations do not become obsessive and aggressive.

Projected jealousy. A really interesting form of jealousy! When a person wants to date, have sex with others but does not want to openly admit it to himself, a bizarre mental process occurs: he/she suspects his / her partner, transferring, projecting on it your repressed desires!

So, he becomes jealous, suspecting that he is cheating, but in reality and unconsciously, he/she is the one who wants to cheat!

Pathological jealousy. Intense emotion can come from illnesses such as paranoia, schizophrenia, personality disorders, or substance abuse. This is an obsessive form of jealousy that is manifested by aggressive or self-aggressive behaviors far from normal.