The Best Relationship Advice You’ll Ever Get

The best relationship advice you’ll ever get? That’s an easy one to answer! I’d been in a few relationships before I met my now-husband, and during each one, someone offered me some tips or tricks on how to make the relationship better. Still, they all boiled down to this one piece of advice that I wish someone had given me much earlier in life: Just be yourself! It sounds obvious, I know, but when you’re in the early throes of romance, it’s all too easy to try to change who you are to please your partner.

Be Loving

You can teach your children some things and some things you cannot. But, one thing that is easy to pass on to our kids is how to treat other people. If you want them to grow up being kind and compassionate adults, we have to teach them as young as possible. One of my favorite ways to do that is by reading You Are Special by Max Lucado repeatedly. As we read it every night before bed, I let my kids talk about what they loved most about that day or how their hearts felt when they saw someone showing kindness or doing something nice for someone else.

Give Space

Too many dating or married couples feel they have to spend every waking moment together, leaving little time for either person to go out with friends or do things on their own. Spending lots of time together is a great way to strengthen your bond. Still, too much leads to unnecessary pressure and anxiety that can stress even otherwise-healthy relationships. So give each other space — both literally and figuratively — and you’ll keep from suffocating one another. You’ll also see each other as individuals with outside interests and opinions, which is an essential part of any long-term relationship.

Don’t Rush In

I’m not saying you should put off dating for decades, but I think it’s essential to wait until you’re in a place where you can truly invest yourself in a relationship. It takes time to get to know someone and learn about who they are and what makes them tick — and that knowledge is much more important than meeting someone when you’re at your best. Find friends and interests that keep you busy during your early 20s, then meet people when it makes sense. You’ll be glad you did!

Spend Time Alone Together

The best relationship advice I ever got was to spend time alone together. Sounds silly, but it’s true! My girlfriend and I take a lot of road trips. We never talk about anything serious on these trips; we hang out together and let our minds wander. It’s a great way to get to know each other even better. Whether you’re living with your partner or dating, try scheduling some time for each other to do something fun (or not) by yourselves every week! If you are married, plan an outing like that once a month. This will help both of you grow in your ways while also helping keep your marriage strong!

Talk About Your Feelings Regularly

Please don’t wait for a special occasion to show your partner how much you care about them. My most fantastic memories from long-term relationships have been simple experiences with no bells and whistles: dinner out, a night on our couch watching TV together, or something similar. It’s not that those things are inherently more valuable than expensive outings; it’s just that special moments aren’t easy to schedule in advance and don’t always happen spontaneously when you need them to. However, what does happen every day — if you make it so — is that you can take your partner’s hand as they walk in a door, kiss them when they get home from work, hug them before bed…and so on.

Make Your Partner Feel Special Daily

If you want to start your relationship with a bang, experts agree that small acts of kindness and expressions of gratitude go a long way. Expressing appreciation has been shown to improve relationships, explains Dr. Kate Levinson, couples therapist and founder of Modern Love Center. When we take time out to let our partners know how much they mean to us and appreciate them, it creates intimacy. Make your partner feel special daily by giving them personalized compliments about their appearance or character.

Accept Their Flaws And Focus On Their Good Qualities

Some people put way too much stock in whether or not someone’s a good match for them. First, let me say that you can make anyone a good game for you if you want to — but why would you like to? The key is not to try to mold your significant other into who you think they should be. Instead, accept their flaws and focus on their good qualities instead. This can help foster a better bond between you two, which will help take away from whatever negative traits they might have.

Keep Things Exciting In Bed & Outside Of Bed!

According to a survey conducted by Clark University, 28% of couples cited lack of sex as a reason they split up. That’s not a good ratio. If you want your relationship to stay alive and well, you need to keep things exciting in bed and outside of bed. My partner is my best friend, and we’re just as happy sitting on our couch watching Netflix as we are spending time together elsewhere. And even though I know, there’s life after love. I still get butterflies when she texts me that she can’t wait for me to get home from work so we can spend time together tonight… you must show each other how much you care in both beds AND out of it!

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