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Ten MORE things Covid-19 has created that need naming

Covid-19 is responsible for lots of new emotions and experiences that as of yet don't have a name, but should, here are ten more suggestions for the new language of Coronavirus.

By Leo Dis VinciPublished 3 years ago 5 min read
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Ten MORE things Covid-19 has created that need naming
Photo by Glen Carrie on Unsplash

Last year, I created a coronavirus dictionary to help name ten new emotions and experiences that COVID-19 had helped create. It is my most successful Vocal piece to date, so like a Hollywood studio rather than create fresh new material, I am hoping that a sequel will bring similar success. Cynical, I know, but to be fair I think I have enough material to work with to make at least a Godfather II and maybe even ‘The Empire Strikes Back’ - just as long as it’s a better sequel than ‘Batman and Robin’ – I’ll be happy.

Once again, the things I have chosen to name are a mixture of sensations, situations and stuff that are a direct consequence of living in the shadow of a global pandemic for over 12 months. Below I provide definitions of the words and examples of how they can be used in everyday English.

Covuck (noun) /kəʊ’vʌk/

The act of fornication between two people during a global pandemic whilst barely knowing each other and after only spending time together dating in each other’s house. A covuck always precedes any actual time together in any public situation, scenario or setting with other humans.

“Tom didn’t say much before, during or after a covuck with Claire, but she did hope he would at least speak if he ever got to meet her friends or family after lockdown. Although, they would have to deny the timing of their first covuck.”

Covuck(verb)

To fornicate with people who you barely know at a time when you really shouldn’t.

“Ellie wasn’t sure if it was love, lockdown or just covucking, whatever, it felt slightly forbidden and she liked it.”

Ronabition (noun) /rəʊnə’ abɪʃ(ə)n/

The unrealistic and highly unachievable aims people have set themselves during lockdown to accomplish due to the perceived increased of time. Losing weight, writing ‘that book’ and being more creative are typical ronabitions.

“Dave’s ronabition to get a six-pack, while working out in his new self-built home gym, ended in disaster when the poorly secured chin bar collapsed under his weight breaking both his ass and Mr Tiddles, the family cat.”

Lockart (noun) /lɒk’ ɑːt/

The numerous pieces of art and crafts spamming social media which demonstrate the distinct lack of talent and skill most people possess. A lot of lockart is a direct consequence of people’s grandiose ronabitions and complete delusion about their actual creative abilities.

“Karen was convinced that her friends on Instagram loved her homemade macrame teddy bear hammocks. However, even she had to admit doubts when an online sex shop contacted her to see if they could be made in leather and ‘gerbil-sized’. She needed a new ronabition.”

Corometry (noun) / kəʊ’ ɒmɪtri/

The branch of mathematics dedicated entirely to working out the properties and relations of social distances between two or more humans at any one point in any one place. Not to be confused with coralgebra, which is the use of letters, numbers and formulas to calculate the number of people allowed in any one gathering if they are from multiple households, family groups and bubbles.

“There was some dubious corometry on show between delegates at the Republican party rally.”

Vacmeme (noun) /vak’ miːm/

The highly irresponsible and rarely amusing memes posted by anti-vaxxers to scare and deter people from receiving potentially life-saving medical treatment. Vacmemes frequently use images that may offend both individuals and entire cultures.

“Despite eating large quantities of industrialized farm meat pumped full of vaccines and also being the direct descendant of people who avoided dying of small-pox, polio, measles, mumps and rubella thanks to vaccines, Wayne thought his anti-vaccine meme featuring Homer Simpson and a pangolin both topical and hilarious – What a massive dickhead!”

Coronad (noun) /kəʊ ˈrəʊnəd/

The intensely annoying and disingenuous adverts created by huge money-making corporations in an attempt to fool people into thinking we are all in this together and that they really care. Many coronads feature excessive amounts of zoom style videos and obnoxious poems.

“The latest coronad from John’s bank was the final straw. He simply couldn’t stomach any more poems about how they cared when it was thoroughly clear from his treatment after his job loss and subsequent financial difficulties that they didn’t.”

Lockback (noun) /lɒk’bak/

The sense of nostalgia or loss when reminiscing and fondly remembering the simple things we used to enjoy before coronavirus and lockdowns.

“Sat on his golf buggy, Donald had a vivid lockback about how sweet life used to be when he could grab pussies, mock the disabled, and was the most tremendous tremendously president of all time.”

Lockback (verb)

To look back at life before lockdown with happiness.

“Boris lockbacked fondly to the time when people had zero expectation of him and didn’t want him to make crucially important decisions like a leader should. Coronavirus had been a real shitter for his bumbling fool persona.”

Maskteria (noun) /mɑːsk ‘stɪərɪə/

The sudden surge or burst of anger that comes from having to wear a facemask in situations that are just not suited to it. Most common forms of maskteria include shopping while wearing glasses, hearing another person speak, and trying to cast flirty looks on public transport.

“Dereck had a severe attack of maskteria when for some inexplicable reason he perceived the mask he was wearing the reason why he couldn’t hear nor understand the gas station teller stood behind 3 inches of plastic glass wearing a mask.”

Corbage (US) (also known as Clitter (UK)) (noun) /kəʊ’bɪdʒ/

The large quantities of trash blowing around city streets and due entirely to coronavirus and the decrease of public services. Blue disposable face masks are the most common form of corbage.

“The depressingly high levels of corbage on the streets had driven Daniel to organise a community corbage pick-up day to help clear the streets.”

Ronarize (noun) / rəʊnə’ rʌɪz/

The forced smile pulled often, and fortunately, behind a mask in person when hearing a friend describes a story or situation which meant they blatantly ignored laws, government advice, or health warnings to achieve.

“Michael pulled a large ronarize as he saw yet another Instragram post of his friend Gabriella clearly getting drunk again in a house that wasn’t hers.”

Ronarize (verb)

To pull a smile or grin which masks your true feeling of disgust at a friend or family member breaking lockdown rules to satisfy their selfish wants.

“Vanessa ronarized through gritted teeth as she listened to yet another girlfriend justify that a secret, and currently illegal, manicure and pedicure was actually a matter of life of death and essential for their mental health.”

So, there we go. Ten more things we have perhaps all experienced in the last year during the pandemic and multiple lockdowns that we don’t have names for, but now do.

I continue to encourage everyone to come with their own words to describe the crazy thoughts, feelings and sensations we have all witnessed in the last year.

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About the Creator

Leo Dis Vinci

UK-based creative, filmmaker, artist and writer. 80s' Geek, Star Wars fan and cinephile.

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