Team Farrow

Before I say anything else, I want to say that anything I’ve written here are my own opinions formed by much research and my viewings of the available episodes of "Allen V. Farrow" on HBO. I don’t know any of the individual parties involved or have any first-hand knowledge of what may or may not have occurred. I have zero interest in exploiting or antagonizing anyone involved. All I simply want to do is share my thoughts on this series, and everything surrounding it.

Anyone who knows me knows I am a lover of books and movies. I love being swept away by good stories, while also learning about the craft and all of the pieces that make up a great story. Many writers have become part of my Rolodex of inspiration over the years; Stephen King, Jodie Picoult, and Chuck Palanuick, just to name a few. Another writer who came into this line up is Woody Allen.

I was born in early August of 1992, so for many years I was unaware of the scandal which surrounded Woody Allen during that period. My interest in his work didn’t even surface until my early twenties when I saw a two part documentary film out Woody Allen, sharing his life story and the stories behind his vast body of work. Seeing this film left me very much intrigued and inspired.

I thought “My God, how have I not gotten into his work sooner?”, the creative narcotic is very much the story of my life, as well as the question of our own mortality. However, what I didn’t connect with was the near obsession with much younger women. While I did notice these young love interests in these films, I didn’t notice them the way I do now. Upon first viewing, my mind jumped to my own love interests throughout my life. Many of the relationships I’ve had throughout my adult life have been with older partners. The age difference between my significant other of three years is seventeen years and eight months, a connection I myself pursued, while he played hard to get and took everything very slow, out of respect for me and out of respect of our age difference since I was twenty-five years old at the time when we first met. If there was anything that caught my attention about the younger women in Woody Allen’s films, it was through the eyes of my own personal experiences, as well as being naïve to the possibility of someone I admired as an artist was actually a monster disguising himself as a nervous and narcotic man who could spin a great yarn.

And what a yarn he has spun for the last thirty years.

Everything show in the first two episodes of "Allen V. Farrow" is a very different story from the own people have chosen to believe. The narrative that Mia Farrow was a woman scorned upon finding out about Woody Allen’s affair with Mia’s adopted adult daughter Soon-Yi Previn, and she sought revenge by coaching the daughter she shared with Woody Allen, Dylan Farrow, to say that he had molested her.

For some time, like many others, I admit I believed this version.

Until now. Until watching these first two episodes.

My reasoning? Well, it’s a simple series of reasons.

One, Mia Farrow has done little if any interviews about Woody Allen over the last three decades. If this was a ploy to destroy him and his reputation, isn’t it fair to say that she would have hunted down any journalist who would listen to tell “her side” of the story, or that she would have sued him for millions rather than involved law enforcement to file charges, or put her child (who was seven years old at the time of these allegations) through brutal examinations and interviews if these claims weren’t true?

Sure, I am well aware that women can be just as vicious if not worse than men in situations like this (Amber Heard being a prime example). However, watching Mia Farrow tell her story in these first two episodes, that’s not the impression I get from Mia Farrow at all.

Watching her, I saw the face of a heart broken mother who wishes she could have done everything different, but knows there’s nothing she can do to change it now besides tell her story.

This much I can see in her eyes and body language.

Mia isn’t lying.

And neither is Dylan Farrow, who made the claims of allegations in the first place.

Dylan isn’t lying; this much I can also see in her eyes and her body language.

In the cases of both mother and daughter, their eyes don’t dart around as they speak, they don’t fidget or sound defensive as they tell their stories.

I see two women, telling their experiences with the same man, as they remember it. That much is clear, and should have been clear to everyone from the beginning. It should have been clear to me from the beginning.

Woody Allen wasn’t charge in anything then, and hasn’t been charged with anything now. As I’ve said, I don’t know anyone involved, but I do know one thing, I would NEVER put myself or any of my nieces in a position to be alone with him. NEVER in a million years. Even if for the sake of argument he isn’t a child molester, he is most certainly a dirty old man.

I will write more about the episodes themselves in future vocal pieces, but that’s not what I want this piece to be about.

What I want this piece to be is my public apology to Mia Farrow and to Dylan Farrow.

Mia, if you read this, words can’t even begin to tell you how sorry I am for what you went through and how my support for this man has encouraged the tolerance of his behavior. I feel like a fool who got swooped into the narrative he fed the world, and I can only hope with this series, with sharing your story, you will find some peace. I also hope you can accept a stranger’s apology for allowing him to live on without any consequences for his actions. I’m not a mother, but I know from those close to me including my own mother that motherhood isn’t easy, and I know from what I can see that you did everything you could with what you knew in those moments. Mia, I believe you, and what happened to your baby wasn’t your fault.

Dylan, I should have known better once I heard your side of the story when you spoke on CBS Good Morning. I have been sexually assaulted and I should have known better than to doubt you for a second. For that, I am so sorry and hope you can forgive me, even if you don’t know me. I know what it feels like to not be believed after that piece of your soul is stolen from you. I know what it feels like to have the panic attacks when certain smells, certain images, certain faces, slaps you in the face with memories you wish would just go away. I know how that feels, yet, I failed. I failed you and I am sorry. I believe you. I believe you and what happened to you wasn’t your fault. I hope you know that.

And to Woody Allen, if you read this, all I have to say is shame on you. Just...shame on you.