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Should I Wait For My Ex To Contact Me First (How Do I Get My Ex To Contact Me First)

Have you been wondering to yourself should I wait for my ex to contact me first? It's a common problem as you may know. It's not right that you're sitting there thinking how do I get my ex to contact me first. It must be tough for you. In fact I know it is. You see, I was in your exact position for...well...too long.

By Kayla EdenPublished 2 years ago 6 min read
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Should I Wait For My Ex To Contact Me First (How Do I Get My Ex To Contact Me First)
Photo by freestocks on Unsplash

People have always considered it hard to get your ex to call you back but they've just been taking the wrong approach. 10 prank pizza deliveries, writing their number on random bathroom walls and signing them up for exciting offers always gets them to call you, but perhaps you want a more positive tone when they do pick up the phone.

Step 1: Call First: There are a number of reasons your ex might be avoiding your call and they all don't have to do with them hating your guts. Your ex could be nervous, worried or simply at a loss of what to say so maybe you should take the initiative and ring them up first.

Step 2: Give Them A Reason To Call: Every call your ex makes to you doesn't have to be to request that you stop sending 10 pizzas to their house every night. Give your ex a reason to call like to congratulate you on an accomplishment or to just thank you for not sending over 10 pizzas.

Step 3: Ease The Pressure: Don't feel pressured to call them and don't make them feel like they must call or else. You don't want an ex to call because they think they have to, you want them to buzz you to hear your voice and to get updated on your life happenings.

Step 4: Be Cool: You don't need to attack your ex with a verbal brow beating of how you disapprove of their current lifestyle or even dating choices. If you talk as a friend and be supportive, the odds are that the calls will increase, without you even getting in bad graces with the pizza company.

Step 5: No Urgency: When you call them, don't insist that they call you back tonight and don't call every 7 minutes until they do. A simple, "Hey, it's been awhile just seeing what you've been up to. Give me a call back sometime if you feel like it otherwise I'll talk to you down the road" emits off a calm vibe.

Step 6: It's Not The Red Nuclear Phone: Your life doesn't hinge on whether your ex calls you back or not. Phone conversations can be awkward even if you've been dating a few months. Don't get discouraged because there are other ways to talk including instant messaging or email.

Step 7: Call Back: You don't want to go Glenn Close and fill up your ex's voicemail by noon everyday but don't consider a one and done as a defeat. If they don't call back the first time, give it a week or so and nonchalantly ring them up again...just be prepared when they do answer that you actually have something to talk about.

Getting Back With Your Ex - The 3 Essential Cs

Getting back with an ex is something that most people misjudge. They either think it is ridiculously easy, or they go to the other extreme and think it is nearly impossible.

The truth is somewhere in between. It depends on the circumstances surrounding your split and on the kind of relationship you and your ex had. By finding this article you have shown yourself that you believe your mission is possible, but that you need some help in achieving it. Congratulations. That is exactly the right mind set for your task. But you also need the three "C's", and here they are.

1. Common Sense.

Be realistic. Don't just try and get your ex back to prove it can be done. You have to have a reason. You have to not only still love them enough to want to spend the rest of your life with them, but also to believe that it would benefit both of you to be back together. So, for example, if there has been any bullying or abuse in the relationship then you have to accept that you are both better off apart.

2. Courage.

Immediately after the split you may feel your situation is hopeless. This is quite natural, especially if harsh words were said. Don't feel sorry for yourself or seek to apportion blame. And don't try to "get back" at your ex, or go to the other extreme of pleading with them to be taken back.

Instead, let your ex know through your behaviour that you are man or woman enough to accept what has happened and to shoulder your share of the blame (even if you consider yourself not to blame for the split - it may be that your ex sees things otherwise).

If you have mutual friends then let them know you still love your ex but that you intend to give them enough space to hopefully reconsider their actions, and in the meantime to become a better person yourself, more like the person they fell in love with in the first place.

If you're brave enough to face what has happened without breaking down or acting in a desperate manner then that will get back to your ex, who should be impressed.

3. Clarity of Purpose.

This is something that is often lacking in someone trying to get their ex back. So ask yourself some questions. Why do you want your ex back? What action on your part would make the best positive impression on them? How do you see your rekindled relationship developing after the reconciliation?

Plan ahead. Are there any events coming up that may give you an opportunity to be with them? How can they best be made aware of your ongoing concern for their well being? What mutual interests do you have that would justify the occasional contact? How can you ensure they receive as much positive information about you as possible, including your program for self-improvement? Put yourself in their shoes and consider things from their point of view. If you really love them everything else will then fall into place.

Do You Truly Wish You Can Get Back Together with Your Ex?

Relationship is a fragile bond that when it's broken, the process of mending can be much more difficult than creating it in the first place. Sometimes it's an extremely difficult task to sort out all the problems and get back together with your ex. No matter how many times you come up with different reasons and approaches, your ex does not seem to change the decision to leave you. If you’d like to get your hands on a step-by-step method for changing your ex's decision about the breakup, click here!

Let me show you exactly what to do to salvage your relationship and rekindle the lost love one more time…even if you're the only one trying…and even if the situation seems hopeless. Head over now to Get Your Ex Back Secrets

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