Second Chances

Staring out the window as it rains, she has his oversized shirt on. She loves his smell on it. She breathes it in deep and sighs. He walks up behind her and wraps his arms around her. She closes her eyes. He asks if she is alright, and she replies "I am now." His body feels so warm against her. She loves the way she feels when he holds her. So safe and so loved. He kisses her neck and pulls her closer. It's not the first time he has held her like this but it feels new to her every time. He whispers "I love you" she whispers softly back " I love you more."

They stand there together without another word, just watching the rain come down. Their road has been a rocky one. Lots of twists and turns. Lots of things blocking the way. They have fallen completely to pieces and always come back together to mend what was broken. An emotional roller coaster with hills to climb and more heart stopping falls than should have been. Yet somehow, they always find a way back. Back to each other, back to the beginning. The place where it was all easy and so simple. Back to where it all started.

She thinks sometimes we need to completely breakdown and fall apart so that we can rebuild and make it better. We learn from the things we do wrong and try not to make the same mistakes twice. He has put up with the complicated times and confusing moments but never once gave up on her or their love. He vowed he would always keep trying and never walk away. He loved her THAT much. She couldn't understand how any man would want to try so hard. They spent time apart without even speaking. They both hurt.

Pain runs deep sometimes. He hurt her, she hurt him and all that ever came out of it was more pain. She would cry sometimes uncontrollably over him and he wondered where it went wrong. He blamed himself and she blamed herself and while the blame game was being played, no one would emerge victorious. She walked around in a fog and he felt lost. When they did see each other across the room, they both fought off the painful tears. Neither one wanting to be the first to break the ice with the other. The silence was louder than words. The truth was so evident, she couldn't/didn't want to be without him and he didn't know how to "fix" it.

Once they both realized that there was a communication problem, they found a common base to begin rebuilding on. It started slowly and was very clear that things needed to change. He had to listen to her and she to him. Not just hear what they had to say to each other...but really listen. The willingness to try to make it better this time around took a lot of courage for both of them. She remembers thinking about how he was "under her skin" and no matter how many times she would tell herself she was done and she didn't love him anymore, the truth was she wasn't done and couldn't stop loving him. She believes that their trials over the time they have spent together was a test of sorts to see just how strong they really were.

They were friends first at the beginning and needed that back. They got lost along the way and had to find their way back, to that point in time when the most important thing to them both was simply being with each other. As the weeks went by they found a renewed strength, a re-kindling. A way to communicate that made sense. The feeling was different this time. More trusting, more loving, happier and more fulfilling. They both felt more comfortable being with each other. It was almost like a re-birth. There was such an undeniable beauty to it now.

There will still be struggles, there always are but now there is a better understanding and a new way of coping. A new chance at life and love has been given to them and they will treat that chance with loving care.

Now as he holds her, in his oversized shirt, both staring out the window, he now knows why she loves the rain, he needs no explaination and he loves it now too, simply because she does.

- Thank you for never walking away or giving up-

My Love, G.