Paul Fucking Stewart
A Celebration of Our Resident Scottish-Italian Asshole
We all know Paul Stewart, right? RIGHT? Yes. I thought so. Well, I'd like to take a moment to address how awesome our Scottish-Italian psycho is.
Paul was one of the first people on Vocal to show me kindness and share my work. He was one of the first people to leave a nice comment and encourage me to keep writing. He was one of the first people to make me feel seen on Vocal and tell me that my words matter.
He's written so many chaotic pieces of work as well as so many beautiful things. He's recently been dabbling in more mediums like sketching and painting and he's even great at that! He's ALSO a rapper... just in case you didn't know. Check out his sick bars right here! (This piece is also where I stole my cover photo from.. Thank you, Paul!)
Really, our Vocal asshole is one hell of an amazing guy and a jack-of-all-trades. Not JUST a triple threat.. a multi-dimensional threat... with a fucking accent.
If you haven't come across his stuff just yet, where the fuck have you been? He's intimidating us all with a massive FIFTY FUCKING SIX achievements! But he doesn't have a big head or anything... well maybe a little bit of a big head. A medium sized head. An average little bit inflated but perfectly normal and acceptable sized head.
Where was I?
Oh yes, Paul.
In all seriousness, Paul fucking Stewart... you are a treasure here on Vocal and it is a better place with your magnificent contributions. I am honored to call you my friend.
Now you.. yeah YOU.. the one reading this..
Go buy his book!
To finish this off with something y'all know I can't stay away from...
Paul Stewart...
I know you hate rhymes.
Too fucking bad.
Sit down.
Shut up.
And eat my rhymes.
Because this one is for you, my friend!
PAUL
Let me speak of the man
who defies all defini.... tion
a chaotic phenomenon
defying transla... tion
He grabs Vocal by the throat
with his unique Glasgow howl
and serves us up weirdness
with swagger and scowl
His name is Paul!
P to the A to the U to the L
and we all listen in awe
as he casts his weird spell
The brain of a lunatic
spilled over the page
a masterpiece written
on the Vocal stage
He rants about testicles
trees and the dead
A plethora of genius
pours out of his head
"I'm fucking rhyme-phobic!"
He screams at his screen
before writing the most fucked up
art ever seen
End Jam Back grinding
syntax in a knot
Fuck all those elms!
Fucking OAK hits the spot!
Looking fly in a three piece
but we know he's a freak
He's handsome, he's awesome
and brilliantly peak
Paul channels the gutters
the mire, the mud
Of old Glesga street
steeped in sorrow and blood
He's gritty and filthy
A poet. A beast
His language is raw
and his writing, a feast
Oor tale begins on
dusty, dirty streets
where Paul's magic is rotten
and madness repeats
A bright shiny member
of the hip Vocal clique
and your fifty six trophies
are making 'em sick!
Yet, amidst all the shite
all the blood... all the gloom
Paul's a light shining bright
through his chaos and doom
Lovely Ruth, his great wife
is supportive and grand
She gifted him brushes
for his new painters hand
Ruth is watching him blossom
and create new designs
Buying supplies so
Paul's genius can shine
We all watch as this wild
unpredictable master
steers us through art
and beautiful disaster
Here's to Paul Stewart
Our resident ass...hole
and his brilliant, unhinged
existentialist... soul
From Glesga soaked gutters
to canvases new
May we always be blessed
with your unique and weird view
You wonderful, crazy ass
bastard who knows
How to paint, how to write
and say fuck all the foes!
Sasha Desideri has another unofficial challenge! This is my entry on Paul's behalf (cuz she allowed it!) If you'd like to check it out, here is the link!
You can also check out what Paul had to say about me here:
About the Creator
Sara Wilson
I love Ugly Things.
I try and be active AND interactive.
I write... whatever I feel.
Sometimes it's happy.. sometimes it isn't. But it's real. And it's me.
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