Made For Others

My story is summed up in one word--redemption. My wife reminded me to have grace towards the person I was when I was younger because I was just that—young. I use to hold my mistakes close to my chest, not knowing they were seeping through my skin to form hypothetical cancer. Mild anxiety attacks begin to form and my mental stability was tilting like a ship in angry seas. I was losing hold of who I was, who I was created to be...by becoming something foreign to who I am.

High school was bad for me, but only because I didn’t participate in possibilities. I was afraid to fail at being myself. I didn’t attend parties nor did I participate in sports. I drew sketch pieces and wrote poetry. My girlfriend at the time lived in Tyler, Texas. It was fun, but the relationship wasn’t local because I didn’t have the confidence to confront girls. I personally believe the lack of a fatherly example contributed to the evolution of my self-esteem. On the contrary, going back to what my wife stated—God’s grace is sufficient (2 Corinthians 12:9-10).

Attending college made me a better man. I tell others it took me four years to graduate, but seven years to become a man. I started college in 2007 and graduated in 2014. It was through academia I learned the purpose behind my writing. It was to be of great assistance to the unheard and unspoken…because that was me at some point. Being faithful is far greater than being famous…and if you’re able to do both, that’s when the fun begins.

The biggest lesson I’ve ever learned is creating boundaries. This is applied to my relationships and interactions with friends, strangers, and even family. Protecting yourself is very important, specifically if no one else will. Your wellness deserves attention in great detail. Talk to a therapist or counselor every chance you get. Your future self will be highly appreciative. That’s another aspect of life worth considering—giving others what hasn’t been given to you.

Years ago, while shopping at American Eagle, my sister and I were looking at casual khakis. I saw a pair of red ones and decided against it. My sister quickly stated, "Put some color in your life." I was then reminded of how much of it I lacked. Everything was black and white for me. It was time to be vibrant and exhibit zeal in enjoying this one life I get to live. If you ask me what I am, I no longer have one hat to mention, but several. I am a husband, son, brother, friend, uncle, writer, runner, mentor, listener, and most importantly, servant.

I write to be a light in dark places. I write to preserve what is good, holy, and nutritional for the soul. I write to inspire, help heal, encourage, and bring awareness to external and internal oppositions. My writing inspiration comes from Hip-Hop music more so than classic literature. I’m more likely to listen to Sho Baraka than to read Shakespeare on a day off from work. I don’t devalue poetry and the history upon which it was built, but Common and Lecrae caught my attention with rhythmic word play and hyperboles.

I hope my actions mirror the best part of love, the good stuff you can use daily. I will never be perfect, never save everyone's feelings or make them comfortable at their convenience. I strive to make sure everyone is heard, understood, and most importantly, wanted. I give what I want to receive, even if you're not willing to return the gesture. You can tell a lot about someone in the first five minutes of any introduction. I aim to use that time to learn something about you and myself.