Life Is Too Short To Waste It On People Who Suck The Soul Out Of You

You judge a man by a season, and he will give you a reason to commit treason.

When I met my mother at the airport for the first time, I was afraid of what I had to be if I'm around her. I made a system, I only let people in that had the same scares as me.

The notion of letting you in was like peeling a fresh wound just for some air.

Yes, it was what I needed, yet it was the way I'd been hurt as a kid. The sting of rejection was too strong to crack the window for sunshine.

I was getting wan by the day. The time was running out, I'd jogged around the clock to show I can be the man my father never was.

Palms full of sweat, tears on my eyes, at last. I'd never felt what a hug from a mother felt like. I ran as fast as I could. As if my life depended on a basket buzzer. I was happy to finally be home, but was I really home?

My mother was abusive.

Before I moved out of her house, I was afraid of her rage. We never had the best relationship; she never supported my actions - good or bad. Partly because I was a "menace" when I was young, children shouldn't feel like they can't run to their parents for refuge.

There's something about rushing to the same place you lost love, to find love - is it for a sense familiarity? I don't know…

Abuse isn't a scary monster wearing a black costume, no abuse can look like a person you trust taking advantage of your weakness.

I vowed that one day I was going to move out. For the longest time, I was tired of being called names and mind games, i.e., feeling condemned for showing my real emotion. The problem was, I assumed if I kept my relationship with my mother, everything would be okay; after all, she gave birth to me - right?

Wrong!

The longer I stuck around, the more damaging it got.

People don't like change

I found that people only change when they want to; you can't force them. And the same people who suck the life out of you are the same people who hold you back from your true destiny.

Had I followed her advice on life, get a secure job, marry at 30, buy shit you don't need, and die before your death, I would be miserable today. I dropped out, and I'm happy about it because I wouldn't have had the opportunity to discover my passion - I'm still working on it.

Nevertheless, I don't recommend dropping out for no reason. Education is great, but it wasn't for me - I prefer learning as I go and calling my own shots.

When I left my mother out of my life, I discovered the power of following my heart and trusting my gut, we are rarely taught that in school.

The overthinking perfectionist...

Living around people that suck the happiness out of you makes you always overthink. You become the perfectionist you hate, this was me 7 months ago.

Things started to happen naturally.

If I wanted to get up at 5am and go into the wilderness and take photos, I could do it without a problem. If I wanted to create a photo-book or write a book simultaneously (which I'm working on), I could do it all without the thought of my ideas being unrealistic.

You will never be criticized by someone who is doing better than you.

If you are around people that don't support your ambitions, they ain't your friends or family.

The further I drew my self away, the happier I got, it was like a boat dropping the anchor in the water, leaving the dock, like finally getting some bars on your iPhone when leaving a rural area. I had one less thing to worry about - negativity.

Bad choices, cost us everything

When you don't hold negativity around you, it's easier to take risks. When you live around negativity, it's hard, you start to feel like you don't have what it takes to make it.

I guarantee you that if you separate yourself from people that make you unhappy just for a week, the effect on your mental is remarkable.

I had a best friend in high school who I thought was cool, so I used to hang around him all the time. He always had ladies under his arm, partied like a rockstar, sadly he threw his life away. I could've been going to his concerts and live shows.

He got too involved with drugs, alcohol, and sex, I wish I could help him. When I picked him up from his house, he'd spent the night in jail over a dumb fight that could've got him killed.

As a friend, it made me angry and worrisome for him, but he didn't care.

Success is dependent on the company you keep

For those that have been through parental abuse, 

Give a prisoner a pen and paper, and he will write his way out of a sentence, no depreciating commas, periods where he'd have to stop and seduce you with a tangent.

No, his trajectory is that of a laser, sharp and focused as he stabs his way through the walls you've built to destroy his spirit, colliding the walls that confide with him.