Ladies! Get More Love By Giving Less.

What is Overnurturing? It’s doing an excessive amount of during a relationship. Giving an excessive amount of. It’s the reverse of how a relationship works best for a lady. Giving is what men are alleged to do. Women are alleged to receive the love, affection and gifts that men give, then give love and affection back to them. Though many folks have caught onto this, its challenging to prevent doing what we've always done, what we've been told is that the thanks to do things, and to fly within the face of the fallout we fear. So I'm getting to tackle one little issue Nurturing.

Nurturing is masculine. If you would like to urge what he wants to offer , stop nurturing your man.

Radical as this sounds, try it. Stop doing. Stop giving. Stop massaging your husbands feelings. Stop helping your date do the connection thing and let him flounder until he figures it out. He will.

This whole concept of nurturing may be a dilemma for many folks. We expect of mothering, nurturing, caring for our young as a female aspect of ourselves.

It isn't.

Nurturing and caring for others could also be a female trait Motherhood is female but its still about action! Nurturing is about doing. Giving. Your energy goes out of you and toward or into somebody else. Once you give, you're working from a masculine energy place.

We are so familiar with the thought of nurturing being feminine, we get confused. We expect being loving to our men is nurturing them. Massaging their bodies, minds and spirits. There's nothing wrong with the thought of nurturing it's the shape our nurturing takes that causes such a lot difficulty. We are all composed of masculine and female (yin and yang) energies. We move through them fluidly at our greatest, and are stuck in one or the opposite at our worst.

But most folks are stuck at one extreme or the opposite. We either give an excessive amount of all the time then find ourselves resentful all the time, or we go the opposite way and make ourselves emotionally unavailable to our dates, our husbands, our boyfriends, and each man we meet.

Too often, our nurturing energies are perceived by men as mothering. Our actions seem intrusive. We seem to be judging them and finding them arising short otherwise why would they have taking care of? On the opposite hand, they love attention. Don't we all?

To strike some kind of balance once we are all so mightily out of balance, I'm asking you to tug back to zero. To a minimum of imagine pulling back to zero. The baby steps you really take could seem huge. Once you stop doing for your man what he doesn't need you to try to, yet has grown familiar with your doing, may resent your not doing, and can certainly find himself relieved that you've stopped doing, things may get messy before they recover. But they're going to recover.

This is all about Overfunctioning.

What does Overfunctioning and Overnurturing look like?

You come to the door the instant he gets home and ask him how his day went. You offer to massage his neck, his feet, his back because he looks so tired (even though you're even as tired.) otherwise you give your date directions to your house before he asks.

And you invite him in and offer him something to eat or drink without even knowing what he has in mind for the evening. You offer to cook him a meal when he's barely taken you bent an honest restaurant. You offer sex to your husband, without being asked, and albeit you're not within the mood, because you work you ought to. You ask him how he feels, and demonstrate concern for his feelings and moods.

These sounds nurturing, but its not. Its mothering. Nurturing a grown-up is giving him what he wants, not what you think that he needs. Nurturing a grown-up isn't tolerating what you don't want. Not tolerating him treating himself badly or carelessly if it's damaging to you or his relationship with you this suggests smoking, eating badly, not working, never leaving the house.

And you are doing it not by telling him what he must do and helping him roll in the hay, but by telling him how angry it causes you to feel when its happening. Or telling him how good it feels when he does something that creates you cheerful. Let him find out the way to take responsibility for creating you and therefore the relationship happy on his end of it.

This is feminine energy the expression of honest-to-goodness feelings. All the care taking and fixing and doing and massaging and concern is masculine energy in action, and it'll get you nowhere near what you would like.

Try it the female way. Stop nurturing a grown-up man, and begin expressing your feelings moment by moment. The primary time is horrifying on the other hand, you'll see you'll wonder how you ever loved the other way.