I Realized All People Are Not Stupid

Billy Currington sings the words to one of my favorite songs, “God is great, beer is good, and people are crazy.” Over time I absentmindedly revised the words to “people are stupid.” And those are the words I substitute in my mind each time the music plays.

I know! I have a bad attitude but personal experiences and current events warped my feelings towards my fellow man and woman. When humans gather, the unexpected happens and too often these events leave a bitter taste in my mouth leaving me wishing for a little more of the other two nouns in the song, God and beer.

Now, I am writing to encourage you to open up and experiment with making new friends. When I let down the barriers some good things happened.

Recently, I met our neighbors. In the past, prior to retirement, free time to visit with outsiders restricted new friendships. Add to that my husband’s warning that making friends with the neighbors can cause problems, we just never fraternized with the unknown. But due to events beyond our control, we attended a HOA (Home Owners Association) meeting. Without boring you with the details, just know there were some issues we had to address.

We attended the meeting with the refrain “people are stupid” playing in the back of my head; I expected raised voices, complaints and the possibility of verbal threats — if not physical confrontations. Instead, level heads prevailed that led to a board of directors being established and somehow I became the secretary, suddenly thrown into socializing with the neighbors. My husband simply rolled his eyes. I heard some undecipherable words under his breath that I assumed issued a warning.

It’s been a month now so the future is unforeseeable, but I met a lady who altered my perceptions and reminded me to look at life from a different perspective. Her positivity became contagious.

We picked up roadside litter and made friends

Opportunities like this are probably what Randy warned me about. However, when I heard 5 people were planning to clean 2 miles of highway, we volunteered to help — many hands make light work.

While picking up beer cans, plastic bags, and unidentifiable objects, I heard myself mutter, “Stupid people.” As we walked along the roadside surrounded by the changing colors of fall warmed by the sun, we laughed and told stories. At the completion of the task we sat outside at picnic tables and ate pizza. It was fun.

When our new friends told us they were helping at the church yard sale, we cleaned out dark corners and donated our unused stuff to a good cause. Saturday, we visited the church and purchased some new treasures we didn’t even know we needed.

To my surprise, my new friend invited me to lunch with some ladies in the community. My first social invite from a neighbor during our 20+ years of residence. My hesitance prompted her to ask if I was uncomfortable with groups or apprehensive due to COVID. I confided a little of both and to my husband’s horror blurted out, “I think people are stupid!”

In reflection, I am surprised she didn’t simply turn away and cut ties with me once she realized I am a lunatic. Instead she laughed and invited me to lunch on the patio of the golf course, just the two of us. Over salads we discussed HOA issues, and she shared the backgrounds of the people who surrounded our home.

When she started talking about the angry guy on the corner whose front yard is covered in trash, I shook my head knowingly as I remembered our own negative encounter. I lumped him long ago into my stupid people category. Then she explained how he has improved since he remarried and explained his background. Her perspective focused on the positive and presented a human with potential.

During the next few weeks, the HOA board of directors will be meeting and making some decisions. Some homeowners may be disgruntled while others will be excited to be included in discussions. Since retirement, I have been living in a bubble of isolation. After my encounter with one kind, accepting soul, I’ve been reminded that not all people are stupid; some are kind.