Dating: Do's & Don'ts
Dating: Do's & Don'ts

Five Ways to Bring Kissing Back into Your Relationship

by Steven Walker 4 months ago in advice

If you have noticed that your kissing situation with your partner isn't what you'd like it to be, here are a few tips that might help.

Five Ways to Bring Kissing Back into Your Relationship

It is no secret that kissing is one of the first sexual demonstrations of attraction and affection, but some research also indicates that it may be one of the ways we find a compatible mate.

An Oxford University study revealed that the exchange of saliva gives us physiological information about whether or not the person we're kissing is a suitable biological match. It has also been speculated that this is part of the reason why kissing wanes the longer a relationship exists—it's served its purpose and isn't as necessary.

However, whatever the biological reason for kissing, we know for sure that it boosts oxytocin and feelings of desire, so it is important that we make an effort to keep the kissing alive in relationships with a significant other. If you have noticed that your kissing situation with your partner isn't what you'd like it to be, here are a few tips that might help.

Set a Kissing Routine

While scheduling kissing time may sound unromantic, it can actually increase the sexual tension as you look forward to it each day. For example, if you know that no matter what you're going to get a kiss when you get home each night, you might get more excited to greet your partner each evening. You might also want to try kissing for a specific amount of time. If you and your partner decide to kiss for 10 seconds each day, this will get you in the habit of making kissing an important part of your relationship, and pretty soon you may not even need the schedule.

Initiate Kissing More Often

If you're unhappy with the amount of kissing going on in your relationship, take the initiative and make the first move. There is no need to sit back and wait on your partner. Besides, if you steal a few kisses now and then, it just might motivate them to do the same.

According to research paper websites, Major Histocompatibility Complex (MHC) is a collection of genes associated with our immune system, and since we unconsciously want to mate with someone who has a different immune system from ours (to enhance our offspring's chance of survival), kissing might help let us know if we are kissing someone who is too similar to our bloodline.

Experiment With Different Kissing Styles

It is really common for kissing to fall by the wayside in relationships simply because it feels boring after a while. Couples get into a rhythm of kissing, and pretty soon the excitement and arousal that came with the initial kiss is gone. Try experimenting with different styles of kissing, or try kissing in environments or situations where you normally wouldn't.

Talk About Your Kissing Preferences

Talking about any concern you may have in your relationship is always an important thing to do, even when it comes to something as basic as kissing. If you'd like to do more kissing, tell your partner that you'd like each of you to start making more of an effort. Also, find out exactly how your partner likes to be kissed, and you let them in on what your desires are. If you both make it a priority, and focus on being your partner's "ideal kisser," you will likely soon become much more satisfied with that side of your relationship.

Have a "Kissing Only" Night

Once couples move beyond just kissing to more physical contact, kissing often gets ignored. Set aside a night with your partner where you only kiss and don't go any farther. Make yourselves wait. Anticipation can help cultivate more sexual desire for the next night.

Kissing has several purposes in a relationship from helping us gauge compatibility, to expressing affection, to creating arousal. No matter the reason, the fact is that it's important, and should be given some consideration, even if you think you have it all figured out. Try some of these tips to improve the kissing in your relationship, and you will also likely see an improvement in your intimacy and satisfaction.

Read next: 'Chocolate Kisses'
Steven Walker

Steven Walker is a creative writer and content strategist who helps people succeed at self-education, writing, motivation and more by sharing with them his knowledge. Writes blog posts for McEssay.

See all posts by Steven Walker