False Love: How to Understand How Sincere Your Feelings Are

True love can be described as a bond between two people seeking common development. This implies the existence of generosity and freedom in a relationship.

Love has always been the subject of philosophical and psychological writings, paintings, and debates. Of all the definitions and theorems, one thing is certain: without love, the world would have no life.

If there is one thing that animates the soul in man, it is the power to love, the power to be present and attentive to others. The struggle for love remains perhaps the most idyllic of struggles. However, when can we tell the difference between real and addictive love?

And the more such love stimulates the manifestation of the individuality of each of the partners, the more sincere it is. This applies to all forms of love: between parents and children, spouses, partners, etc.

Sometimes attraction can be easily confused with love. Usually, these relationships dampen feelings. They come from the heart, but there is no respect for each other between partners. These feelings are born out of selfish desires or needs and do not go anywhere because they do not benefit both parties.

Here are some examples:

Excessive care

Excessive care is in many ways similar to love, but it is not, no matter how much you care. For the most part, this type of behavior is observed between parents and children, but can often be observed between partners, friends, and other types of relationships.

Excessive care is an obsessive desire to protect a person we consider vulnerable or defenseless. When we love someone, we only wish them the best. But someone who cares too much is beginning to see danger everywhere. Right where it is not.

These people often ignore the fact that negative experiences are a source of important life lessons, so pain and suffering predominate in such relationships. An overly caring partner simply projects his fears on you, but he can't save you from trouble. On the contrary, he eventually becomes the object of his desires and becomes restless and unable to develop.

Addictive love

External control and inner dependence are what a false love relationship looks like. And this is a toxic relationship because one person moves all their needs and disappointments to another.

Thus, it makes the partner responsible for his happiness. The result - you become a substitute for your father or mother, forced to fulfill any wish of a loved one. And such a "mentor" can in no way be lost because it serves as an excellent shield against the difficulties of life.

Really, why solve your problems and make your own decisions if you can change the responsibility to another person?

It may seem to a person who has become addicted that she is madly in love with her partner, but in reality, these relationships are built on mutual exploitation.

Control of love

A strong desire to control other people is reminiscent of excessive care, but it is not the same. In this case, a person in the true sense of the word is trying to humiliate his partner.

Finally, the real desire for a "caring" partner is for the other half of them to stop trusting themselves and become addicted to him.

This behavior has nothing to do with love, and such protection is by no means free because your autonomy and freedom are the payoffs for it.

The controller wants you to be completely dependent on him. On the outside, he seems to want to make you happy, but in reality, he doesn't allow you to live the way you want to.

He's a manipulator that keeps you from leaving. This is not love, just selfish control.

All the forms of false love listed above are harmful: they hide from us what we should fight. Outwardly, it looks like love, but it doesn't lead to anything good. They fill life with pain and hinder the personal growth of partners.

Unfortunately, such relationships sometimes prove to be very strong, and therefore separation is more painful.