What Do Women Want? What About Men?

The passage of time erodes the couple's relationship, but when there is love and respect between two partners, the presence of gestures of affection is a confirmation of the love we still have for the one next to us. Psychologist Keren Rosner pointed out the most important reasons why we need small gestures of tenderness and how they can help us get through critical moments.

Naturally, the frequency of evidence of affection and emotional connection decreases in a couple's relationship after a certain number of years spent together.

But when they become almost non-existent, we must understand that these seemingly small gestures greatly increase well-being and strengthen the quality of the relationship, according to psychotherapist Keren Rosner.

Assessment tool

Affection gestures arise from the need to have contact with the other, to feel that he is there, to pay attention to his physical and emotional presence. It's a way to express your concern for him, it's proof that you carry it in your mind. "Increasing the amount of affectionate interaction can boost or emotionally refresh the relationship.

A word of admiration, a warm smile, a caress, a kiss, a hug, a message of encouragement, a whisper of love, a handshake are precious because they reflect what your partner means to you and reflect your need for him. ", emphasizes the psychotherapist. Rosner believes that the condition can be seen as a "tool" for assessing one partner's interest in the other.

Forms of affection in the couple

Happy couples are naturally engaged in exchanging gestures of affection and, therefore, the satisfaction in the couple's relationship is higher. Affectionate communication is directly related to the commitment and satisfaction in the relationship which, in turn, can predict the "life" of the couple.

Emotional connections between romantic partners also involve physical affection. Physical affection, say the specialists, is transmitted by any touch meant to arouse feelings of love to the giver or to whom it is intended.

Caresses, kisses, holding hands, hugs, massage are forms of affection in the couple. We can also talk about other facets of the manifestation of the condition: messages, gifts, the interest shown, support of the partner, surprises, protection of the couple, tolerance, etc.

The mistake that can easily get your claim denied is to fail

Affection gestures diminish over time or lose their romantic significance due to the couple's crises. Some ruptures suddenly inhibit any emotional manifestation, and the emotional wounds leave no room for closeness, warns Rosner.

This is where the mistake many couples make comes in: it blocks the emotional gestures that can restore the alliance in difficult times. And that's because gestures that denote physical affection strengthen the feeling of intimacy, make partners feel loved and understood, and help defuse conflicts.

What do women want? What about men?

Even though the opposite sex does not seem to give as much importance to these gestures, men and women alike consider such manifestations important. Men prefer kissing, massage, touching as expressive ways of love, while women prefer caressing, holding hands, hugging as a way to express feelings.

In any case, the gestures of affection do not denote weakness and are not dedicated exclusively to women, explains the psychologist. And inhibiting the gestures of affection is related to the education received or to the defense barriers related to the fear of being vulnerable.

Affective gestures are a source of recovery for the couple in difficult times. Even if one of the partners is not used to behaving in this way, they must understand the importance of such gestures, not only for the good of the relationship and the partner but to gain their emotional resources, essential in life.

Psychologist Keren Rosner points out that, in general, women are more frequently harmed by their partner's cold attitude displayed in public, the immediate explanation is that there is someone more important than her, or that feelings are not supported by facts.

From here to a relationship crisis is not much, because interpretations can escalate. There is a need to receive attention from the partner in public while strengthening the belief that such gestures confirm their authenticity. It's like a statement of preference made in front of everyone.