F'Cough

I am an administrative assistant and the only one where I work that is under 40.

I wear skinny jeans and tank tops and dresses, you know fucking CLOTHES TO WORK BECAUSE I AM A HUMAN. These are not inappropriate styles either. Its all very conservative. Except for skinny jeans, because I do not have a small ass.

I also have to be pleasant and nice to everyone who approaches me, which is super hard when men mistake my kindness for flirting.

The most terrifying thing that has EVER happened to me at work was when a guy came in, who I thought was my friend. I don’t have many friends at work and we’d snapchat and text and talk and shit. He’s a cop in training and was really nice and funny.

Till one day.

He came in and we were chatting and he said

“I think about coming in every once in awhile, in full uniform, in kind of a panic and telling you to not ask questions just to come with me. Then we just drive away together. What would you do if I did that?”

Oh? What would I do if you abused your authority as an officer to get me to go somewhere alone with you, thinking that something serious has happened but it turns out you fucKING TRICKED ME?

He had asked me out before but I was seeing someone else and I told him that I was flattered but we’re better as friends.

Then he comes in and says this?!

I’m no stranger to sexual harrassment in any form, but this was seriously terrifying.

Then, a few weeks later he came by and had brought me a boba smoothie from a shop in town. I thought it was a nice jester and maybe I had misjudged his other story. He asked what I was doing after work and I said I was waiting for my boyfriend but that I had to work a little late. He said he was gonna wander around the property and left.

Thats when I started to drink the smoothie. It was really strange though. It tasted like mango but really chalky, then I got a massive headache and started feeling light headed. I had maybe 8 sips and then I threw it away. I thought it was because it was too sugary or something. I had never had a drink that made me feel like that.

After I locked the front door. I moved to another office that doesnt have a view of the front door. Its not unusual for someone to knock on the door and hope someones in. I hear a couple knocks but I ignored it. Then a banging on the door. It kind of scared me. My phone rang and it was my "friend". I answered and he asked if I was still in the office, he thought he dropped his wallet and wanted to come in and look around the shop. I said I had cleaned and didnt see one but that I had already left the office because I didnt feel well. He quickly said bye and hung up. I peeked out and saw him hanging out by his truck looking at my door. After awhile he left, but thats when I realized that he might have put something in the drink.

He came around a couple more times with more smoothies but I told him I was on a diet and couldn't have it. He didn't stop bringing them till my boss stepped in and told him it was inappropriate.

I just wanted a friend. Instead, I was terrified to be alone in the office with him.

I tried telling him that I wasn’t comfortable with him flirting with me and calling me things like “sweetheart” and “babe”. He said he understood but somehow things only got weirder, he’d come by and wrap his arm around my shoulder and hug me and invade my space even more.

Do you know why some women can’t confront men who make them uncomfortable? Because sometimes things only get worse. And who was I going to report him to if things got too far? The cops who were his friends? And when I tried telling other people they’d just say “he just likes you.” A phrase I’ve heard since one boy slapped the back of my head in kindergarten.

So don’t sit there and judge me for putting up with assholes like that, sometimes in life you can’t fight back. Not alone. When I see someone being harassed like that, I stand with them and do what I can because when we’re all silent, we all lose.