Do You Care Enough to Care?

When I was in the woods today

I had a bit of a start

She walked past

without seeing me

I didn’t blend in or camouflage

she just didn’t seem aware of me

Her big brown eyes were shining

here ears were flagging for noise

The nose twitched and searched

and still, I wasn’t there

How many times in a week do I make others invisible? Do they know that I don’t see them? Do they care? I was taken aback by the doe’s reminder of my insignificance. She said,” your presence here means nothing to me.” “You are of no value and offer no threat, so for my purposes, you don’t exist.”

AM I SAYING THE SAME THING when I pass someone sleeping on a bench without feeling anything? If a woman is crying and I ignore her, am I signaling that her problems aren’t mine? When someone in front of me litters, and I don’t say or do anything, have I also ignored his and my responsibilities?

Being observant is the first step to empathy. If I can erase human tragedy, suffering, or delete behavior that is offside, I can’t possibly begin to understand enough to care or care enough to understand. After observation comes acknowledgment, ” I see you, and I see your burden.” ” I feel your pain.” ” I need to say something or do something.”

Step three is deciding. So at this point, you are still off the hook. You haven’t committed to action. I make decisions easily, too easily, many would say. So I don’t know what process you go through to choose. You might do a pros/cons list or a cost-benefit analysis or need to do more research (which is really just an excuse). You may find reasons to intervene or evidence to rush away. If you choose to ignore what you have observed and acknowledged, you are likely already dozens of meters past the situation, and like the deer in the forest have said,” you are of no consequence to me.”

On the other hand, act quickly and with respect and compassion if you choose to say or do something. Be open-handed, open-hearted, and open-minded. “He who hesitates is lost.” Do or say what comes to your mind. Trust that you don’t need a Ph.D. in Caring or Respect before knowing how to be human. You have been training for this all your life; even if you have ignored the lessons or avoided using them, you’ve got this. You’ve got this because it doesn’t need to be perfect. ” Are you okay?”, a smile, sit in silence beside someone, be a fellow human, can change the moment. You are saying without uttering,” I see you, I care, Can I help?” or ” We are rotating on this sphere together, and we both need to do our part to make it better” or ” today you are down, tomorrow it could be me.”

I can’t predict what you will, could, or should do because I am not you, in your shoes, in whatever situation you are finding yourself. But, I can guarantee that ignoring what is in front of you is complicit with the issue that troubled you enough to get to decide. Caution and neutrality are always complicit with the antagonism or aggression in the circumstances. If I don’t care enough to intervene, I don’t care at all. If I don’t care enough to say something, I become part of the problem.

I hope you choose to see those people and behaviors in your world, today, tomorrow, and tomorrow again and that you find the compassion and courage to stand with someone you know or someone you will never know.

Make today Remarkable, or at least bearable, for someone else,

B