Be Your Own Damn Hero

When children are young, a common question they are asked is “Who is your hero?”

The answer is usually an emphatic “Mom!” or “Dad!”

When they grow to be teenagers the answer morphs into something more popular — their favourite movie star, musician, or author. Something that the masses would agree with. Something popular, that their friends would understand but, more importantly, that their friends would agree with.

Then they grow to be young adults, early twenty-somethings who think they know everything. The answer becomes something much more profound and worldly — “Nelson Mandela!”, “Princess Diana!”, or the like. Someone who had a global impact. It's a great idea, but highly unrealistic and almost impossible to accomplish.

Often they then become parents themselves and realize how hard it really is to be a parent. At this point, they may revert back to their original answer. They develop a new respect for their Mom and Dad, realizing that this whole time they have held onto that deep-rooted original hero.

This is all very nice, but at some point, we all need to realize that the hero we idolize is only human. They are NOT perfect, and may not even be the person we think they are. We see them as the version of themselves that they want us to see. We see them as the version of themselves that we WANT to see. We see them as the version of themselves that MAKES them our heroes.

Putting anyone on a pedestal is not fair. They do not deserve that amount of pressure and usually did not ask to be put there. If they possess self-awareness, they will know that they are not the hero they have been made out to be.

The most concerning issue with putting someone up on that pedestal is that the only place to go from there is down.

They WILL fall from grace.

We will discover something about them that takes a chink out of that beautiful crown we bestowed upon them. They will shine just a bit duller. Suddenly, we will start to see them for the person they really are. They may still be a wonderful, good, kind individual — but we now realize they are not perfect. Our perspective of them changes.

Despite all of this, we all need a hero. We all need someone to aspire to. We all need someone to look at and dream of becoming.

That person is the future YOU.

That person is the you that you can become.

That person is who you WANT to become.

You will never be that person because that person is always a FUTURE version of yourself. You must always aspire to be better. That’s the only dream that we can all hope to fulfill — to always be better, be improving, and be learning.

In my opinion, Matthew McConaughey explained it best in his Oscar acceptance speech for Dallas Buyers Club. He said,

“...every day, every week, every month, and every year of my life, my hero’s always 10 years away. I’m never gonna be my hero. I’m not gonna attain that. I know I’m not, and that’s just fine with me because that keeps me with somebody to keep on chasing.”

We all have heroes. It's IMPORTANT to have heroes. What’s also important is to keep our perspective of that hero realistic.

Be your own damn hero. Always aspire to be a better version of yourself. Always aspire to be a better person in your community and your family.

Always aspire to be the best person YOU can be.

Until next time……………………. XO — JGF