Are you fed up in your relationship?

As a Coach I have had many enquires about Relationship Coaching due to many couples having problems with their partner, especially during this time.

Having to stay at home and work from home and being in the same space as your partner 24/7 can be a strain on relationships. Many couples give up dressing up and looking their best, due to being at home all day. Some give up on their health and choose to let themselves go physically and eat crap and just binge watch tv shows. Ladies give up on shaving their legs and men give up shaving their beard...and most probably the conversation has died as you both have run out of things new to talk about because you know everything about each other already, as you see each other doing what you do everyday.

There is no mystery and no time to miss each other (unless you send one of you to get the shopping and the other stays at home). A relationship can go from exciting and vibrant to boring and routined.

This is then when the arguments start to rise and becomes the only excitement in the house due to the raised energy involved.

So what do many couples contemplate?...Divorce or separating!

If this is you, please don't make this decision right now. Trust me lockdown is not the time to make a big decision like this. What you both need to be doing is figuring out how to spark up the relationship and re-kindle the flame that once was.

Think about it - when you first met your partner, how many of you would've loved the idea of being with them all the time and spending quality time together? I bet most of you would've filled the time with fun things to do in between working from home. I bet the 'physical activities' in the home would've been pumping for sure :-)

This is where you need to take your relationship back to. You need to stop reacting to what the current situation is and both of you need a good honest chat with each other and discuss ways to bring back the spark for both of you.

Here are a few pointers:

- Make the effort to look after yourself physically. Take the time to groom yourself on a daily basis and do those extra things that keep you in tip top condition. Don't let the hairs grow out of hand and please don't stay in your pjays all day.

- Consider spicing things up in the bedroom. Instead of just doing the same position when having sex, try something new. Maybe consider bringing in some sex toys and explore it together. Bring massages into the equation and explore sensations and fantasies together.

- Dress up for sex. Don't forget ladies that underwear can make you feel sexy or not. Don't just wear the usual, try something that will spice things up and make you feel sexy.

- Create special evenings or special weekends that include conversation, laughter and playfulness. Playfulness is so important in a relationship. Pull out the Twister if you have it and get creative.

- Cook together and try new things together. Explore new ways you can get to know each others likes and dislikes again. Over time we all change and so does our likes and dislikes. So get to know each other again and share.

- The most important thing is communication. Don't fester the feelings within, open up to each other and talk. The more communication a couple has, the stronger they will be. Don't be a stranger to each other at home.

What you bring to your relationship is important. You are both responsible for making the relationship work or fail. When you both make the effort for the relationship and with each other only then will you both be in a better position to make the decision as to whether the relationship is good or not working out.

Remember, this is a difficult time for many and the traits that you maybe currently seeing in your partner right now, may be due to stress and anxiety. So give you both time and be supportive to each other, not each others enemy.

You are both in this together.