The big pang theory of creating the galaxy

NOTE: The Anoitosphronesis, an obscure document found in Ashurbanipal's ancient library, reveals the origin of our galaxy. It uncovers a realm filled with Dust and an enigmatic emotion known as the Big Pang. The document's translation, long debated among scholars, has now been released to the public, shedding light on the ancient history of our universe.

Once upon a time, in a place that existed before the concept of Time itself, far removed from any known location in the vast expanse, there was nothing but Dust. Dust filled every corner of this primordial realm, and at its very core, hidden beneath layers of dusty particles, lay even more Dust. Within this endless expanse of Dust, where no sentient beings yet roamed, a profound and mysterious emotion took shape - the Big Pang. It was an overwhelming feeling of regret and loneliness, invisible to the naked eye (or any eye for that matter).

The emergence of such a powerful emotion in a cloud of Dust where no beings existed is a conundrum beyond comprehension. Some believe it may have been sparked by the chance coming together of two motes of Dust, while others speculate that a chaotic Dust pattern might have spontaneously given rise to this enigmatic emotion. Nevertheless, the Big Pang was real, and it was not alone for long.

In a bid to alleviate its solitude, the Big Pang brought forth a companion, whom it named Pooky. The Big Pang and Pooky found solace and joy in each other's company, exploring the twists and turns of the dusty cosmos and exchanging ideas about their own existence. They even wondered about the strange concept of television, despite having no notion of what it entailed. For a while, contentment embraced them, and a sense of harmony permeated their Dust-filled world.

However, as time passed, Pooky began to grow older and more substantial. With this growth came a longing for something beyond the monotonous landscape of dusty Dust. Pooky became dissatisfied, and with this dissatisfaction came the invention of a novel concept - complaining. The core of Dust, once peaceful, resonated with Pooky's grievances.

Faced with Pooky's unhappiness, the Big Pang attempted to appease its companion by molding the intangible Guilt, the only semblance of clay in their domain, into green toys. Each toy was crafted with care and love, hoping to bring joy to Pooky's heart. But as Pooky's discontentment continued, the well of Guilt slowly ran dry, leaving the Big Pang desperate to find a solution.

In the wake of depleting Guilt, a dark and potent emotion arose within the Big Pang - Red Anger. It seethed within the Big Pang, now fraught with exasperation and resentment. Pooky, unwittingly, had become the cause of the Big Pang's distress, despite all the efforts made to create and befriend him.

As the Big Pang grappled with its overpowering Anger, Pooky, in a moment of frustration, bestowed a new name upon the once benevolent creator - the Little Bother. The Big Pang's Anger now had a target, and it clung to this name like an identity. The Little Bother had pushed the Big Pang beyond its limits.

The relationship between the Big Pang and the Little Bother became strained, and they grew distant. The Big Pang avoided the Little Bother in what became known as the Great Sulk, while the Little Bother felt abandoned and misunderstood.

Yet, even amidst this tension, a glimmer of understanding remained between them. They knew that their actions had led to the creation of a chaotic mess in the form of stars, planets, and moonlets strewn across the cosmos. In a moment of shared remorse and responsibility, they exchanged Blue Apologies woven from Green Guilt and Yellow Shame, giving rise to a profound bond called the Great White Understanding.

Together, they sought a way to address the Mess they had created, knowing that undoing it was beyond their power. The Big Pang introduced Time, an ingenious creation that allowed the blazing spheres to eventually cool down and dim. Meanwhile, the Little Bother devised Gravity, a heavy task that drew the spheres together, slowly bringing order to the universe as they collided and merged into larger entities.

As they waited for the Mess to settle, the Big Pang and the Little Bother embarked on a journey through the vast expanse of dusty Universes, sharing their Great White Understanding and exchanging tokens of their friendship made from Guilt, Dust, and a touch of Friendship.

In this way, the stars, planets, and moons of our galaxy, The Milky Way, came into existence, arising from the remnants of the Messy Way. Their cosmic dance continues, a testament to the eternal bond between the Big Pang and the Little Bother, who learned the importance of empathy, understanding, and the art of creating something beautiful from the Dust of regret and loneliness.