I Just Saw a Man Shoot Uncle Dave! Ain't No Place Safe Anymore

What kind of a sick bastard would shoot a man at a theme park?

Now, I could understand if it was over ticket prices but trying to take somebody out just to cover up another crime is the most cowardly act I've ever seen.

And you didn't just try and off any ole' body; You tried to take out the highly, beloved Uncle Dave.

You mutha - - - 

If you were going to take out anybody, it should be the scriptwriter of this film. 

Remember when I said, "who says sequels can't be better then the original" in my last piece?

Well, it doesn't apply in this film's case.

"Beverly Hills Cop III" is what you would call an acquired taste like caviar, sugar in grits or bacon on a cheeseburger.

Now, the movie's not as bad as the reviews might lead you to believe.

The film does have a certain charm and being it's the 30th year since its release, I thought I'd do a deep dive into the benigned film.

Background

Eddie Murphy reprises his role as the smooth-talking Axel Foley who's back in Beverly Hills once again.

This time, it's to trace down the scumbags who murdered his boss and beloved mentor, Inspector Gill.

After the last "Beverly Hills Cop" movie, Murphy's star didn't dim at all.

In fact, he followed it up with a string of hits such as "Coming to America" "Harlem Nights" "Another 48 Hrs." and as one reviewer wrote on imdb, the vastly, underappreciated film, "Boomerang."

Now, he did do "The Distingushed Gentleman" which flopped at the theaters like an Austrailian bass out of water.

So to say he was looking to get back on the proverbial horse after being thrown off at the last race would be putting it mildly to say the least.

After the aforementioned flop, critics & fans alike had a few questions for Murphy when it came to this upcoming film such as,

Would he be able to bounce back on track?

Would this movie be able to live up to the expectations and legacy of the other two films.?

Now I know what you all might be thinking.

It’s just one bad movie out of the several I named earlier but it’s a “what-have-you-done-for-me-lately” type of business we’re dealing with here.

Well, by now, we all know the answers to those questions but keep on reading.

With all further ado, lets get started, shall we?!

Inserts movie into my Philips Magnavox DVD player.

Remember those things?

The opening score for the film isn't too shabby.

As a matter of fact, it's perfect for THIS movie.

After all, this is more of a "kid-friendly" "Beverly Hills Cop" movie.

This is the type of movie where parents can take their bad ass kids to see and have them kicking people's seats and raising Cain & Undertaker throughout the whole movie.

To be honest, those chaps will probably be using more profanity in real life with their friends then Murphy uses in this entire film.

I hear the sound of a train crossing tracks.

Speaking of trains, don't you hate it when you're waiting for one of those motherfuckers to pass and the shit be longer then 27 football fields?!

What the hell are they carrying?! The whole state of Texas?!

I'm only 59 seconds into the film and I have to say the casting for the cops surrounding Foley in this scene was done pretty well.

They look like people that don't know what the fuck they're doing but they look cool while not knowing what the fuck they're doing.

The legendary Inspector Gill shows up to the scene and asks Foley about the SWAT team.

Foley tells him that he cancelled SWAT which brings forth this response by Gill,

"You what?! I wouldn't raid a church bingo without SWAT¹." 01:20–01.23

You know something Inspector Gill, I wouldn't do that shit either.

The only thing about Foley is, he's a little too overconfident for my liking.

He's severly, underestimating the opposition which will come back to haunt him or should I say somebody close to him, unfortunately.

Another thing about this film, which follows the other films is that the soundtrack's bumping.

Ain't nothing like some Diana Ross and the Supremes, "Come See About Me."

I don't know about you all but when I'm operating an illegal chop shop, I just can't do it without "the Motown Sound."

These guys were really grooving to the tune. One man even did a cartwheel.

Even his fellow henchman had to remind him he was doing a little too much.

The higher level bad guys arrive in style in an early 1990's Ford Crown Victoria.

I refer to them as higher level because of their attire and these really nice, looking gloves they had on.

I remember the Crown Vic. Sighs

This was back when Ford was Ford and now…..They're just Ford.

These high-level bad guys are not playing around.

They just completely annihilated the competition.

I really hate dishonorable thieves.

Foley's team arrives at the chop shop not knowing that the crew they've been investigating has been completely taken out.

One of Foley's officers reminds him that they should've called SWAT.

You think?!

A few of his officers head into the shop when they're met by gunfire while tripping over corpses which I thought was pretty damn funny.

Inspector Todd arrives to the scene to see the showdown at the OK Corral in Motown.

Inspector Todd's wounded by the head honcho.

Foley heads into the shop and sees the nameless honcho firing two more rounds into the back of his mentor.

In true Inspector Todd fashion, he leaves Foley with this last call to action,

"Axel, you on a coffee break? Go get that son of a bitch²!" 9:08–9:15

That's one of my favorite lines of the film.

Hope you're resting well in Hollywood and real-life Heaven, sir.

Foley gives chase after the group of bandits in a nice-looking Ferrari.

It's more like a Lego Ferrari because it seems like something's always coming apart off of it during the chase.

Timothy Carhart does a decent job as the lead villain, Ellis DeWald.

However, I don't think he lived up to the standards set by the two foreign villains from the previous films.

I will say the smile he gave Foley after he fired those two shots into Inspector Todd was a nice touch.

My analysis on him would be that he was the perfect villain for the time period and movie.

One thing he did well as a true villain was treating his "employees" like the useless pieces of shit they are.

One of his henchmen gets wounded by Foley in the chase and asks for DeWald's help.

He opens up his door and pushes him out the van so he can get run over by Foley and twisted up like a pretzel.

Well, he did help him…….by putting him out of his misery.

The face Foley makes when he sees the body contort after he runs it over is priceless.

Now, Foley should've known from the jump Fulbright was full of shit.

You can tell by his nonchalant attitude.

Plus, he helped DeWald escape.

The actor, Stephen McHattie, who plays Fullbright is very stone-faced.

I think they could've gotten somebody else for this role.

Someone a little more convincing that he was trying to investigate DeWald.

Al Green with a cameo in this film performing his very own reinditon of "Amazing Grace" for Inspector Todd's funeral.

Foley and some of the other detectives are discussing leads into Inspector Todd's death along with just who is this Fulbright character.

Foley heads on over and visits with Inspector Todd's widow.

That's when we learn his first name was Douglas.

Foley tries telling her his last words were about her.

Knowing her husband like she did, she knows that's not the case.

That's when he tells her what he really said to him and the two share a moment as we get a segue into Beverly Hills.

And Here we are………Back in Californ-i-a.

Foley arrives at the Beverly Hills Police station and is greeted by an automated system.

Lol at the "if you got homeless people on your lawn" line.

What the hell is Farci though?!

Anyways, Foley finds out that Billy Rosewood has moved up in the game.

He's now Sgt. William Rosewood with his own private office fitted with venetian blinds, a Ficus & and a mini-fridge. #Winning (in a Charlie Sheen voice.)

Here we see actor Hector Elizondo, who plays John Flint, introduced into the mix.

He's pretty much Taggart's replacement which we learn is now retired, living in Phoenix and playing golf.

Other then the golf part that other stuff doesn't sound too bad at all.

Flint tells Foley that he knows the lead security guy at Wonder World personally and can get him a meeting with him.

Foley heads down to Wonder World to meet up with the Head of Security for the fictious theme park where he's greeted by a cutie who's working reception at the place.

You know this is Hollywood because ain't nobody that fine working the front desk at a fucking theme park. 

Not even in Cali.

Apparently, Foley's not on the list and is notified that he will have to buy a ticket by the pretty, young thing at the front desk.

He protests and is greeted by two, presumably, roided-up security guards.

He buys a ticket and gives them a fashion tip about how they can better hide their firearms under their jackets.

Foley's right though.

35 dollars is too damn high for an amusement park ticket.

I'm curious to know how much one of those tickets might cost today.

Heads on over to the search engine for some field research.

I was looking for Astroworld tickets but they kept mentioning Travis Scott every time so I settled on finding the price of a Disneyland ticket instead.

And of course, these greedy mofos never give you a straight up answer.

According to Disneyland's website, a 2 day ticket for an adult is 310 bucks and 290 for a child.

Awww. That's mighty thoughtful of them to knock off 20 for the tykes.

I'm assuming a one day ticket would cost you around 155 bucks.

Damn! I wonder what Foley would've thought about that price.

Foley hands his ticket to another hot thing at the gate.

Boy, Wonder World is just bursting at the seams with top notch "talent."

I wonder do they have any openings. (No pun intended) #askingforafriend.

Here we are introduced to a picture of an infamous character in the series, Uncle Dave who has a strong resemblance to Merv Griffin.

More on Uncle Dave later.

One of the security guards is seen talking to a smoking, hot brunette.

Again, if they have patrons like that, sign me up, amigo.

Foley recognizes the security guard from the shootout at the chop shop.

He heads into the treehouse as Foley follows suit.

Speaking of trees, I would've loved showing that fine lady this big ole Sequoia I have in my……………………………………………………………………front yard.

Back to the film.

Staying on the topic of fine honies, we're introduced to the great Theresa Randle who plays Janice Perkins. 

Don't ask me what her job title is because I don't know.

Maybe, it's just being a fine ass woman at a theme park. Shrugs shoulders.

By the way, I'm still mad at the fact she's not in the newest "Bad Boy" movie but that's a whole other review for another time.

The 90's had some mighty, fine women.

Seeing these beauties makes me wish I could go back in time.

I wonder if Marty McFly would lend me his DeLorean for a few years.

Seriously, we need like a masculine version of "Calgon, take me away" for the fellas.

Foley spends some time with the young lady before being spotted by the high-level crooks from the chop shop shootout.

One of the security guards takes a shot at Foley and misses.

Next, a security guard falls from the Heaven's and lands right on top of Foley.

Now you know good and damn well, that big ass security guard is not jumping 10 feet down from a scaffold.

Foley's able to exit the treehouse and heads to one of the rides where he cuts in front of a couple and gets in one.

One of the people he cuts in front of just so happens to be George Lucas with a cameo here.

I wonder much he got paid for this.

He probably would've did the shit for free if it meant he didn't have to make another fucking "Star Wars" movie.

I can see why Lucas is a director though because he can't act for shit.

Wait a minute! Isn't that the kid from "A Million to Juan?"

Heads to imdb.com to verify whether I'm correct or not.

Yep! That's lil' Alejandro played by actor Jonathan Hernandez.

He's the scared kid Foley has to rescue after the security guards damage the cranking system trying to get Foley down.

Alejandro's mama is kinda fine.

I'd be like,

"since I rescued your son, how about you and I get together later on so you can "thank" me more properly."

Please fill free to "thank" the hell out of me too.

Hope I don't come off sounding too douchebag-ish but that's a fine woman right there.

Good grief! That whole "rescuing the kid" scene gave me anxiety just by looking at Foley holding onto that ladder while it's still going round and round high up in the air.

Eventually, Foley’s caught and is taken away to DeWald’s office where he meets the rest of his goons.

I must reiterate about how the movie has been scored very well thus far.

Hector Elizondo's eating the hell out a burrito when he hears about a disturbance at Wonder World.

"Axel!"

Finish your burrito first, sir.

John Saxon, who plays Orrin Sanderson (DeWalds' second-in-command) looks like he's dealing with the worse case of hemorroids.

Two words, bro; Preparation H.

That's right. Bring fine ass Ms. Perkins in here for a minute.

Right now, we got a sausage fest going on in here and I'm a vegan.

She takes a stand right by her soon-to-be man. I'd say she's a keeper.

The receptionist announces DeWald's arrival and she doesn't seem too please to see him either.

I guess she can recognize the stench of a scumbag a mile a way as well.

Foley meets the infamous Mr. DeWald who's the same guy that murdered Inspector Todd.

Foley lunges at DeWald but is restrained by the steroid-enhanced, security goons.

He tells them DeWald was the man who shot a police officer in Detroit.

DeWald comes up with some lame ass excuse about how he was at his beach house in Laguna last weekend.

Now Dewald, you know damn well, you don't own a beach house in Laguna.

On a security guard salary at that?! And in Cali?!

You just told on yourself right there, homie.

The only way you're going to own something like that is if you have another "revenue stream" coming in.

Good grief! Hector Elizonda's doing some major ass-kissing asking DeWald, "if we're still on for the golf game tomorrow?"

Why don't you just blow the guy already?! Damn!

Even Taggart didn't kiss ass like that. At least, he had some backbone.

I miss that guy even more.

As Foley's driving around town in the next scene, I noticed they had another remix of the Axel Foley theme; This time with a house music-infused beat.

It's not too bad. 

Again, it's for the time period. After all, it is the early 90's.

Foley heads back to his hotel room when he notices the door to his room's ajar.

He draws out his firearm and heads into room.

This is when we're first introduced to Uncle Dave, in person, instead of by photo like earlier.

Foley apologizes for almost "busting a cap in his ass" as the two share pleasantries.

Ms. Perkins is also there as well.

She accompanied Uncle Dave to Foley's hotel room because Uncle Dave knows something's amiss with his park.

He just doesn't know what so he comes to Foley looking for some answers.

Dave tells Foley about the disappearance of a Roger Fry who was a close friend of his.

He was also Chief of Security for Wonder World.

He disappeared some time ago but not before leaving behind a note which Uncle Dave gives to Foley.

Foley believes Fry found something he wasn't supposed to find and that's the reason why he hasn't been seen since.

Foley, accompanied by Rosewood, head to the event DeWald's scheduled to be at where he meets up with an old friend,

Serlllllgeeeeee.

Bronson Pinchot reprises his role as Serge who steals the movie.

I was going to talk about how he had just a brief appearance towards the end of this film but I forgot about this scene here,

"Serge: Do you do colonics? Foley: Excuse me? Serge: Do you do colonics? Foley: Coloni - ? No, never have. Serge: It's my favorite thinggggg! Foley: Ooooh, you did the colonics? Serge: I can't tell you what it's like because they stick a hose up inside your.. Foley: I know, we don't.. Serge: But you got to understand out comes a candy bar from when you were five³." 41:57–42:15

Serge really came up.

He went from running an art gallery to a gun gallery.

You have to commend his work ethic.

Serge shows the guys a project he's been working on which is some sort of state-of-the-art, futuristic machine gun.

The weapon is highly impressive but check out the babes that's in this ad holding it.

Talk about some major ammunition.

Those are the type of cannons I would love to shoot.

A little more about the gun though.

It comes equipped with a cellular phone, microwave oven and a compact disc player among other things.

Lol at Serge telling them Jackie Stallone and her son Sly brought a bunch of them.

Now I can understand why Rambo brought a bunch but I don't know why Jackie would buy some.

She's a psychic, right? So, if she was ever about to be attacked wouldn't see that shit coming?!

Oh and Zsa Zsa Gabor brought one too. I wonder what for.

Foley and Rosewood head to the room where DeWald's event is being held.

You can tell this DeWald guy's dirtier then a fuel injector on a 2000 Chrysler.

Anytime you see a guy surrounded by at-risk kids, you already know the fix is in.

That's your killer right there.

Plus, he's got the kids dressed like holdovers from the "New Edition" & "Menudo" boy bands.

Wait a minute?! DeWald isn't just attending the event; He is the event.

He's getting ready to receive the "Man of the Year" award.

I guess crime really does pay and doles out rewards quite handsomely.

Everyone's giving a round of applause to DeWald as Foley begins to follow suit.

Now, his intent is to crash the party and provide the people with a little more insight into just exactly who Ellis DeWald really is but in a subtle way.

The crowd may not understand what Foley's really saying during his speech but I guarantee DeWald understands it quite perfectly.

The two have words after Foley's speech,

"Foley: Go on and smile. Let's get them last few smiles in. DeWald: Well, what's the matter Foley? You mad at me for shooting your boyfriend⁴?" 50:27–50:35

Rosewood was really "ride or die" for real.

The way he leaped onto that stage and took out all those security guards after they jumped on Foley for punching DeWald makes him BFF material.

Foley calls Flint to bail him and Rosewood out after the two get arrested at Dewald's event.

He's not much help since he's still drinking "the Ellis DeWald koolaid."

However, Foley does get help from another law enforcement officer.

Yep, it's Fulbright from earlier.

The non-descript "agent" who looks and sounds like he hasn't had a decent bowel movement in 36 years.

Two words: Raisin Bran.........and a lot of it.

The two have a conversation and Fulbright gives him his card and wants Foley to contact him whenever he has more info on DeWald.

Foley and Rosewood are picked up by Flint after they're release as the trio heads down to the beach to take a look at an armored truck which was found there.

As Flint's driving the fellas around, it dawned on me why this shit flopped. 

Unfortunately, I'm not going to delve into that in this post. 

I just realized this got'damn article is over 3600 words already and I'm only halfway through with the movie. 

I think I'm going to split this one into two parts for the sake of the readers' eyes and my sanity from having to edit all of this shit. 

Whewwww. (Wipes sweat from my brow')

Keep an eye out for part two of the "BHC III" review coming to a writing platform near you. 

Stay tuned!

References

1. Beverly Hills Cop III. Dir. John Landis. Paramount Pictures & Eddie Murphy Productions (1994) Paramount Home Entertainment (United States, 2020) Blu-ray
2. Beverly Hills Cop III. Dir. John Landis. Paramount Pictures & Eddie Murphy Productions (1994) Paramount Home Entertainment (United States, 2020) Blu-ray
3. Beverly Hills Cop III. Dir. John Landis. Paramount Pictures & Eddie Murphy Productions (1994) Paramount Home Entertainment (United States, 2020) Blu-ray
4. Beverly Hills Cop III. Dir. John Landis. Paramount Pictures & Eddie Murphy Productions (1994) Paramount Home Entertainment (United States, 2020) Blu-ray