How Vocal Has Changed My Life

It’s my 25th birthday today and I would love to say a massive thank you to Vocal because of the way it has changed my life over the course of the last couple of years. It’s not because of the clicks, or the money, or even the V+ sign that I have now, though they come into it. It’s because Vocal Media can let you reach a whole range of audiences over the media spectrum. I have had my articles shared by people I don’t know on Facebook groups, I have had some of the people included in my articles such as writers respond to me with thanks, I have gotten great responses from my articles and book reviews stating that it was very insightful and has gone on to persuade others to read the book (the most recent being “Brother Robert” by Annye C. Anderson). So I would not only like to thank Vocal Media, but I would like to celebrate my 25th birthday, on the 25th day alongside my articles of 25 films, books and albums with you - on Vocal Media.

I was born 25 years’ ago today and from sources I have asked for, I was a happy and confident child growing up. But, something happened. I don’t know what happened, I don’t know when and I don’t know why. But I became an existential and miserable teenager. I was ostracised from my school pals and I had probably one friend who I would do anything for even though we haven’t spoken for about three years. So, after school ended, I went to sixth form and I had absolutely zero friends at all. I used to get laughed at because I was super shy and talk in a whispery voice. It didn’t bother me all too much. But, when I went to university to study for my undergraduate degree, I started off a blog on a different site - just book reviews and stuff, and it got thousands of views. I was surprised. I got views and comments for reading books. I had my own website for a while but it was difficult because I needed people to just stumble across it. On my undergraduate, because I was considered the smartest person on my course - you can imagine that I was also popular. Especially when it came to group projects. When it came to a group project about blogging and marketing reviews, I was the one people wanted to hang out with, but I went along with one of my friends (someone who has always been there for me, I will not share her name but I would love to say thank you to her for getting the nurse when I collapsed from an anxiety attack in the library at university. I will always adore her).

When I discovered Vocal Media, I was at a pretty good place when it came to audiences. But I had moved university for my postgraduate degree (which, for some reason I’m planning to return to for my PhD). It was there where I was ostracised once again. I had zero friends once again. The two friends I did have, I only spoke to in class. One of those men would go on to kill himself at the end of term, I was broken. I was in shock and I didn’t return to university after that, I just did my thesis, handed it in, got my postgraduate degree and left. I had no want to go back to class. Even the lecturers would ostracise me, with one of my lecturers calling my ideas of creativity ‘stupid’ and thus going on to ignore me. Some of the younger lecturers liked me because they seemed to find out I was a massive Bob Dylan fan, but after being called ‘stupid’, I didn’t really want to know anymore. The other students ostracised me because I wasn’t upper-middle class enough. They were all those rich upper-middle class hipsters and honestly, the two friends I did have were a caucasian man who read fan-fiction about “The Sandman” and a Jamaican man who was born on the same day as me (so say happy birthday to my friend as well, I still adore you mate - you’ll always be great). So, where was my head at this time? What did I do in order to take my mind of this torrid situation in which I found myself? What did I do even though I was more miserable than ever in order to make myself feel that tiny bit better? I wrote for Vocal Media.

When Vocal Media was in my life and I was writing it, I automatically found myself in a better place. I knew that even if one person read my article, I would feel like I had a friend or someone who at least cared about what I had to say. After having years of being silenced, being talked over and having little to no voice as an Indian Woman - I wanted to have some amount of voice. I do not mind whether you agree with me or not - I still love the fact you read it. As I started writing more and more, I garnered more and more views with some amassing to thousands and are still being read to this day even though they were written some months or even a year ago. But there was another reason I loved Vocal Media - it didn’t discriminate. Let me explain.

When I was doing my postgraduate degree in Film and Writing, I was pretty stuck on wanting to be a film critic or independent director of some kind. I was working on about four essays, a portfolio and my thesis at this time and it was about a month before my brother’s wedding. So I would say this happened in March, 2018 - or around that time. There was a job open for a film critic from a company I don’t remember and I was sitting in a cafe, again by myself about an hour before my lecture began, thinking about whether I would go to it or just go home. I opened the job application on my laptop and began typing up my personal details and uploading my resume. I saw some people from my course who I didn’t speak to but came and sat by me anyway. They asked me what I was doing and I told them the truth; I was applying for a job as a film critic. These were all women who were sitting with me, which was weird because I had mainly garnered mostly male friends. One of the women, a blonde whom I will not name - stated in these words that have pretty much hit me every time I thought about them, “I mean you want to be careful. Companies that do film criticism aren’t really keen on hiring your kind…” I asked her what she meant and she then said, “What I’m trying to say is that the people who like reading film criticism are normally young to middle aged white men. Nobody wants to read a Hollywood film review by a small brown woman…” I applied for the job anyway and I didn’t get it down to a lack of experience. After that, I decided to take my film reviews, book reviews, cinematography articles, filmmaker’s guides and others to Vocal Media. The best thing about it is that Vocal Media doesn’t care who you are as long as you write a compelling article. In the reverse situation, Vocal Media has been so kind to me - as a woman who previously in and out of the home, doesn’t really have much of a voice - I have found that I can actually write compelling and educational stuff. Let me talk to you about my goals for my articles.

My articles are normally about films, books and music. Mostly films and books though. I write educational articles entitled “The Filmmaker’s Guide…” because I don’t think that film education should be just for the elite who can afford expensive universities. Arts subjects tend to be closed off to people who require jobs quickly and I do not agree with how much we have to pay for it. As someone who grew up mildly comfortable, I would like to share all my knowledge with you for free. The more people it is shared with, the more my goal is reached. You do not need a university education in order to study arts subjects. You simply need to appreciate what you are experiencing. And that is my goal for that. When it comes to my book reviews, they are mainly for sharing books with people. I have gotten many messages over the years where people have said that I have convinced them to read a certain book based on my review of it. That honestly, warms my heart and if even one person reads a book from my book reviews, then I have reached my goal.

So I would love to say a big thank you to Vocal Media on my 25th Birthday because without you, I would really have no voice at all. I don’t talk much in real life, I’m not very outgoing or smiley, I suffer with agoraphobia and hypochondria and it has been very difficult for me psychologically over the past couple of years. Vocal Media has made me rethink my position and has made me believe that in some way, somehow, I could have some impact over someone. I could make someone who previously would not read a book, pick it up and give it a go. I can help someone get into film because in reality, it really isn’t that difficult. I can help somehow and without Vocal Media I don’t think I would be able to do that. So celebrate my 25th Birthday with me on Vocal Media gaining some insight into what I write, listening to my favourite albums, watching my favourite films and reading my favourite books - I know that’s what I’ll be doing. Also, I give you permission in the midst of your New Year’s diet to have a slice of cake! Thank you Vocal Media, you have changed my life for the better and here’s to another year that we are together.