True Loves Nightmare

Zoey woke up, panicked, breathing hard. She was sweating profusely, mind and body both agitated. Breathlessly she was trying to remember her dream, grasping at the pictures the other part of her mind was desperately trying to erase.

A face. An enemy? No, their eyes suggested a friend. More than a friend? The lips were moving, saying something, the words lost. A forest behind the face, large trees, bigger than any she knew. A feeling, was it loss? Grief? No, it was love. True love. This face was her true love in her dream.

Zoey was hopelessly grasping at this dream, but it was like catching fog. Already the face was fading, the lips didn’t move anymore. The eyes had lost their colour. Were there trees in the background?

Breakfast came and went, weetabix, plain as usual. Her trip to school was the same as always, traffic never differed at 8:30 in her small homely village.

She felt a desperation during her school assembly to return to her dream, despite now not remembering anything about it. The urge was there, she had to go back. Barely talking to anyone during her first few lessons, she didn't raise her hand to answer a single question in double geography, nor did she take any notes during her history lesson, and double maths went by without a word or number spoken. She just sailed through almost dreamily until lunch.

Zoeys school always had the same thing for lunch, it never tasted bad so she never felt the need to bring in her own. There was always a selection of things, but being a creature of habit, she chose the same meal, essentially a full English breakfast minus a few items, baked beans, sausages and a fried egg. She would've had it with hash browns, but the school didn't do them, she hated the taste of tomatoes, and the mushrooms were always too slimy for her liking. Vaguely, she remembered a long time ago having a slice of toast with it, but she remembered it always filled her up too much, so she had switched to no carbs.

The afternoon went by in a haze, 3:30 came around, and she was finally able to leave school, get back in her car that was parked in her usual spot and drive back home. Another boring day at school completed, another evening that her mother is working lates so Zoey has to cook her own dinner, chicken nuggets and chips. Mindless, she thought to herself, a whole day of nothing, everything just went from bland to bland, the only vague happiness or joy that came from today existed in the form of a faded memory of her dream last night. By now, she had no idea what any context of the dream was. She closed her eyes after finishing her dinner to try and remember, but nothing came to mind. All she could think about was the day she'd had, and how boring and quite frankly useless school was getting, exams weren't for a while, so it felt like she wasn't working towards any goals.

She watched some TV, scrolled on her phone, and called it a day at around 11pm, allowing herself to drift off to sleep with the TV playing some nature documentary in the background.

An alarm. Loud. Zoeys eyes opened. Her phone was blaring at her, drowsily she swiped her thumb across the screen to stop the noise. Then she slumped back down.

She remembered the face, friendly, eyes darting, worried? Lips moving, gently. He was talking to her, saying… What?

She was looking up at him, from a bed? No, the floor, she could almost feel the roots of trees underneath her back. She smiled at the face, this is a nice dream she thought. And the face smiled back, Zoey saw love in the way he looked at her.

Alarm. Zoey snapped awake, her backup alarm 15 minutes later had gone off, she'd overslept again.

She went through the motions of her morning. Got ready, had breakfast, left the house and went to school. Her morning lessons flew by and she could still remember the face at lunch time, looking down on her smiling. The dimples on either cheek, the small worry lines above his eyes, his lips parted talking to her.

Come back to me.

She'd heard it clear as day, Zoey was sure she had. She looked around, and took notice of what and who was around her. Nobody was looking her way, no one was close to her, no one even noticed her, and no one was moving. She was halfway through a sausage. It was like time had paused, then suddenly the bustle of movement continued, the sound of people around her buzzed in her ears as she continued her lunch.

Zoeys afternoon lessons were dull, but at least there were only four of them. Physics then Chemistry, followed by double English with Mrs Patterson to finish the day. She couldn't wait to get home. She found her car in its usual spot, and drove home, her drive being slow and boring, the same as always.

At home, Zoeys mother, working lates as usual had restocked the chicken nuggets and chips for Zoey to help herself to. Sticking to routine she had her dinner, treated herself to some TV before curling up and scrolling on her phone before sighing at the boredom of current life, and going to sleep.

She opened her eyes. He was there, as he always was. He smiled down at her, “come back to me”, he said. And she heard it, it was exactly the same as she'd heard it during the day. She took in more of her surroundings, forest surrounding the face, tall trees with huge leaves trying to block the blue sky behind. Sunlight streamed through the gaps the branches left creating little pockets of light all around her. Her gaze rested upon the man in front of her, she should know him, he looked down with so much adoration, she felt bad for not recognising him. She couldn't speak, not that she wanted to currently, she was just taking in everything around her.

He was talking again, although no words reached her ears. His mouth opened and closed and what she heard was a distant noise, loud, unbearing. Alarm.

Zoey woke up, the alarm was loud, she lazily swiped her thumb across her phone stemming the noise. She felt panicked, she was breathing heavily and sweating. The memories of her dream flowing and ebbing in her mind like the ocean's waves. Trying to grab hold of those memories and keep them close to her was difficult, but she had felt like that before. This time felt different. The face was still lingering, she could still hear what his voice sounded like, and see the trees behind him.

Alarm. She had nodded off, and woke up to her backup alarm, again. Her morning routine went uninterrupted, getting ready, breakfast and driving to school all went off without a hitch. Zoeys morning lessons, as usual, were boring and slow. She found herself staring out of the window throughout most of her double geography class. History was the worst for sure, the teacher was dull, and Zoey was too engrossed in remembering her dream that she didn’t pay too much attention or write anything down. Her next lesson, double maths, wasn’t much better but at least it felt like it went quicker and she was able to settle down in the lunch hall for some food.

While Zoey was eating, she remembered her strange experience at lunch the day before. She looked around her at the people going about their days, and not one person looked her way, not that she minded, she always preferred to eat on her own, but no one even glanced in her direction as she ate.

She had stabbed her fork into something on her plate, and lifted it to take a bite, it was a sausage. In fact, it was the same sausage she ate everyday at the same lunch.

She froze, and it was like a switch had been flicked in her mind. She was eating the same lunch, surrounded by the same people. Each day, she had been going to the same boring lessons in the same order. Before school she had eaten the same breakfast, and then had the same journey in, and after school her mother had always been on lates, and she had the same nightly routine.

Everyday was the same, not just similar, exactly the same.

What was happening? Her eyes were going fuzzy, she could see his blurry face in front of her, she could hear the soft rustle of the wind and feel the rough bed beneath her back. She was daydreaming, she had to be. She forced her eyes shut and slowed her breathing, trying to prevent the anxious feeling she could feel swelling up inside her. She opened her eyes.

She was back. She wasn’t daydreaming anymore, nor was she dreaming at all. She could feel the light breeze brushing against her face, blowing her hair gently across her face. She could feel the forest bed underneath her back as she lay on the makeshift bed. She gazed up at the trees that were so bold and beautiful, that had so much meaning to her. And most importantly, she could see him, in front of her, his worry lines she had noticed before in her ‘dreams’ were dissipating.