Minus One
A Microfiction challenge entry - A story in 88 words
By Dana StewartPublished about a year ago • 1 min read
16
Share
Photo by Vanessa Serpas on Unsplash
You winked at me over Monday Night Football. I smiled and drank stale beer. You courted me with roses and chocolates. I vowed forever. You hated the Ramen I kept on the table. You ate it anyway. Graduation and promotions. We moved to the suburbs. I forgot what your face looked like. You joined the country club. I learned how to play tennis. You hired another new secretary. I followed you to that motel. You used that degree to court me again. I smiled and drink stale beer.
16
Share
About the Creator
Reader insights
Nice work
Very well written. Keep up the good work!
Top insight
Heartfelt and relatable
The story invoked strong personal emotions
Comments (10)
88 words, but a lifetime together. Excellent piece, Dana.
Subtle statements like: I learned how to play tennis, after writing: You joined the country club say a lot in really few words. Good work!
This is beautiful!!
So many relationships described in 88 words! Well done my friend ❤️
"I forgot what your face looked like" yet "I smiled and drink stale beer" again at the end. This describes the ups and downs of relationships so well - simply and beautifully. Reading this was a journey; also comforting. I really, really loved this!
I like that you said stale beer. it really added to the story. once again you did it.
Oh wow, so very real, and what a use of such limited words to tell a story spanning so much time! Loved it!
Oof, this one stung. You wrote a cycle of years in so few words. Beautifully done!
Oh I loved how you created this whole story that kind of came full circle and with such a cool form. Excellent entry!!
Nicely done 👍👌