I Thought We Agreed

Michelle's POV 2 hours before the incident

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The tears had begun to flow from my eyes and I hadn’t even realized it happened. I closed my eyes and allowed myself a moment to process this pain that was etched so deeply into my soul that I sometimes wondered if I would ever be able to find myself again. ‘I feel so lost’ I thought as I held the printed words so tightly in my hands that I thought they would crumple between my fingers. “Damn it!” I cursed loudly.

The sound of footsteps could be heard from the front door. ‘Shit, he’s home,’ I lamented. I loved my husband with all of my heart but I was so afraid. How could he love someone like me? I wondered to myself what he must think when he looks at me. The shame that I felt only increased when his beautiful eyes would catch me reading the letter my sister left me. This time would be no different as our eyes met when he entered the room. He scanned my face and lowered his gaze to the crumpled letter that rested between my fingers.

“Michelle, baby, no, I thought we agreed, no more of this,” he said to me. The look of anguish and pain etched his masculine features. He was taller than me by a good 5 inches and from where he stood the straight legged jeans he wore with a button down top made him look like the ideal male specimen. ‘Stupid woman, he could have anyone he wants and he’s here wasting his time with you,’ I mentally chastised myself.

As though he could read my mind he said simply “Stop it,”

“Stop what?” I asked even though I knew what he was referring to.

“Stop looking at me like I am going to leave you because it’s not going to happen so forget about it. If you insist on this, I will be here with you but you have to promise me that you will not read this without me anymore. Do we have an agreement?” he asked as he took a few more paces into the room. He still hasn't come to me completely and a part of me wondered if he was not approaching me because he didn’t want to or if he was afraid of something.

I brushed the fear from my mind and allowed myself to trust the man that I loved with every ounce of my being. “I don’t know that I can make that promise David.” I said simply. It was the truth. I knew that I couldn’t trust myself when it came to Victoria. She haunted me, she haunted my dreams, she haunted my waking day. I had become so obsessed with her that the thought of lying to him and telling him that I wouldn’t pick up this piece of paper and read it without him was unforgivable. I would forever be consumed with her story.

He sighed heavily and moved even closer towards me. The space between us grew smaller. My heart ached whenever he was near. It was as though be possessed a magical power that made all of my doubts, worries and fears fade away. His presence would ignite a fire within me and instill a deep sense of peace at the same time.

“Don’t,” I said and I didn’t know why.

“Don’t what?” he asked as he inched slowly closer.

“Don’t come closer,” I said and when I said it I covered my mouth. The realization that I just asked him to do something I didn’t want him to do had not escaped me. ‘What is wrong with me?’ I wondered. “I…” suddenly I found myself stammering. I wanted him near me. I needed him near me. ‘Why did I ask him to stop?’ this thought consumed me. I was so lost in my own mind that I hadn’t noticed him drawing closer until I was wrapped in his arms.

“You mean like this?” he said as he held me tightly. The warmth I felt in his embrace was a gentle comfort.

I couldn’t help but smile. This man, this wonderful man would be the light in this darkness and together we may just find the redemption that I’ve been searching for.