Floating Through Time

It was a cold, snowy day when I had my first time traveling experience. I was sitting in my grandmother’s living room, bored. I had never really believed in magic or any sort of mysteries of the universe. If time traveling were real, it wouldn’t be for many many years, until a scientist created it. I was firm in my beliefs. There were no alternate realities or dimensions, no portals to other places. All we have, all that is important, is the here and the now.

I could never have guessed how radically my perspective could change on such concrete matters. But that day in my grandmother’s house changed everything.

I spent most of the day following my grandmother around. I think I’d started to get on her nerves finally when she turned from her crocheting in her favorite chair. She lifted her eyebrows and peered at me from over her glasses before speaking.

“I have an idea actually,” she said matter-of-factly. “How about you go downstairs and search through some of my old boxes of books and games, maybe you’ll find something more exciting down there. And I can get back to my crocheting in some peace and quiet, please” She smiled as she turned back to her work.

I understood her not waiting for an answer meant I had no choice. I hated going into the basement of her house. The smell was musty and damp. Everything had 30 years of dust sitting on it. But I obliged and headed down the creaky stairs.

Leaning against the stairwell were three large shelves piled high with books and old boxes. I’d never known what was in them. I started reading the sides of the boxes.

My eyes were searching for something intriguing when they landed on a label that said “Magic, Mysteries, and Marvels - Not For Kids.” How had I never noticed this before?

I pulled the box onto the floor near a chair. Inside was three giant books, an hourglass, and what looked like a rolled up map. The books were titled with only the words One, Two, and Three in gold lettering and they looked handmade. I grabbed the third book on a whim, and opened it up. I coughed from the cloud of dust that flew out and wiped the page to read it better.

“You are about to enter the third realm of the spirit, the period of time will become clear to you on your journey. It is, however, a tragic tale, so try not to become too consumed with the murky waters. Keep yourself afloat and you will return back stronger than ever. And remember, follow the rules of the hourglass and never lose sight of your map. It is your ticket home. Flip the page to begin, but only when you are ready.”

I was so confused. I paused for a moment before deciding what to do. I could flip the page and read on, but I was curious about the hourglass. I picked it up and cleared it of dust. It was the biggest hourglass I’d ever seen and had small crystal gems inside of it rather than sand. Each one was a slightly different hue and they all glittered in the light. I noticed there was a piece of paper stuck to the bottom of it and I lifted it up and pulled it off to read what it said.

“With the map rolled in hand, flip the hourglass, turn the page of the book you are on and begin your journey. Do not, under any circumstances, let the hourglass run out before you return. You will have three full days as soon as you turn the page.”

Everything was written in dark, cursive writing. I was excited but did not think it was anything more than a fun mystery novel. I grabbed the map, turned the hourglass upside down on the table behind me and flipped the page.

After that, the room went black. I heard a surging sound, like the sound of all the power being zapped from the house. I felt a spinning sensation. I was about to stand up from my chair when I heard a seagull cawing overhead. The smell of salt water filled my nostrils and the taste of it filled my mouth.

I opened my eyes and realized I was standing on the deck of a large cruise ship. I started stumbling, trying to regain my balance while taking in my surroundings. There was an odd sensation that I was not really myself anymore. I felt the map clutched in my right hand and used my left to pat my pockets, searching for some sign of where. The clothes I was wearing felt different. They were stiff and silkier than my usual jeans and a t-shirt. I was wearing a vest and some sort of old-fashioned suit jacket. I felt something in my vest pocket and grabbed it. It was a silver pocket watch that had the words “Time Traveling Timer” etched on the front. I flipped it open and saw a miniature hourglass with gems floating from the top to the bottom. Surrounding the hourglass was a ticking hand and only three marks, one for each of the three days allotted on the hourglass rules.

I pinched myself. I could not find any reason to believe I was actually time traveling. I simply had to have been dreaming. But the pinch hurt me and made me feel more awake and alive than ever. I sighed, deciding what to do next. I landed on figuring out where I was and what year I was in. I slipped the map into the vest pocket along with the watch and started to wander around the ship deck.

As I was walking along I started to see some families and groups of people gathered around. The women were wearing flowy satin dresses with lace trim and beading, hats, and furred overcoats. It was a bit chilly out here, which felt surprising for a bright, sunny ship deck. I heard a boat horn sound and looked back to see four, giant, golden colored smoke stacks in the center of the ship. It seemed familiar yet I still couldn't place what boat I was on and where I was in time.

I approached one of the groups of men and women gathered around each other, as it seemed more fitting to ask adults. I cleared my throat as I approached and glanced around the group. They were mid conversation but stopped abruptly when I arrived.

“Hello Jacob,” said a man to my left. I was startled to hear a name but also somewhat relieved. I realized I must be Jacob.

“Yes, hello sir,” I smiled, “would you happen to have a paper or something with a date on it perchance?” Even the way I was speaking felt more formal than I was used to.

“Jacob, don’t you think we know each other well enough by now? Couldn’t we use less formalities? Calling me sir makes it sound like you’ve just met me in this instant,” the man chuckled.

“And yes, I do have a paper, back in my suite. Didn’t you have one as well? I thought they had left one in each suite the day we arrived?” He was still smiling and seemed quite friendly.

“Oh yes, I seem to have lost it though. Maybe I’ll have another look around. You wouldn’t happen to remember which suite I’m staying in would you?” I had leaned in to whisper this part as the other members of the group were staring at me now, looking as though I’d lost my mind.

“Are you feeling alright Jacob? Seasick? Had a bit too much to drink last night in the smoking lounge?” The man chuckled a bit again, this time sounding more nervous than last and then he spoke again. “How about I accompany you to your suite and you can have a rest? We can meet up again later for drinks before dinner?”

“Sure. That sounds lovely to me.” I responded. I felt like I wasn’t in control of the way I was speaking, but it seemed to work in my favor. Judging by the way everyone was dressed, they all must have been at least 100 years older than me.

The man who spoke with me turned and began to walk toward the smoke stacks. We were facing a door to the inside of the ship. He didn’t say much at first and I tried to keep my thoughts and questions to myself so as not to raise any more suspicion. We went inside and were greeted by families walking along a beautiful hallway, laughing and talking amongst themselves. It felt carefree and relaxed here and the families seemed to feel that way as well.

We approached the top of a grand staircase and I turned to head down it. The man grabbed my arm and ushered me forward, along to the next hallway.

“Your suite is on B deck Jacob, no need to go down to E” he said softly, and he continued holding my elbow to guide me along.

“I’m sorry if I seem off, I must just be feeling seasick is all. I don’t know what has gotten into me.” I glanced at him as I spoke.

“Very well, it happens to the best of us, let's just get you back now so you can rest it off” he said with a slight sigh.

We turned a corner and were now facing a long hallway again, this time with doors lined up along either side, facing each other. It looked like a fancy hotel, with plush red carpeting, chandeliers, and ornate wallpaper between the wooden molding.

“And here we are, I believe this is your suite Jacob, but only you can know for sure” he looked inquisitive as he spoke this time.

I started to pat my pockets in search of a room key but the man I was walking with just opened the door. I stepped inside hoping this was the correct room.

“Thank you sir - um, I mean - Thank you. Your help today will not be forgotten. I would love to accompany you to the lounge for drinks before dining tonight, if you are still interested, of course” I smiled at him.

“Yes of course. I’ll come back here in a few hours and we can walk together again.” He smiled and added, “oh and in case you’ve forgotten, I’m your wife’s brother, Thomas” he winked as he shut the door behind him.

My mind started reeling as I stood in the doorway to the room, staring at the closed door. I was on board a giant ship, it was at least 100 years before my time, my name was Jacob, I had a wife, I was in a suite….

“Darling, is everything alright? Do you need something?” A woman’s soft voice spoke behind me and I could hear the sound of her heels on the carpet as she approached. She put her hand on my shoulder and nudged me over.

“Uh, oh, yes quite alright darling. I’m just feeling a bit seasick. Thomas walked me back to the suite. I think I’ll need to lay down for a bit so we can meet him for drinks and dinner later.”

“Oh I’m glad he was of some help to you. He’s usually such a nuisance. But rather perfect timing actually, I’m headed down to meet some ladies for tea at the Veranda. You get some rest and I’ll wake you when it’s time to dress for dinner.” She spoke so gently and lovingly.

“Thank you dear, I appreciate you.” I turned toward her and kissed her cheek before she walked out of the room.

Now that I was alone I was able to get a good look around and find out where I was, if I could wrap my head around all that had happened moments before. My eyes darted around the room, scanning the furniture and taking in all of the details. It was a very high-end room, with doors on either side that led to more rooms. I was looking at a card table and chairs and a chaise lounge facing a fireplace. The wallpaper was immaculate and the wood paneling looked hand carved and pristine. Everything was shining. The fabrics all matched in colors and velvety soft textures. Through the other doors I could see a bathroom and a bedroom. The bedroom had a similar color scheme. The blanket on the bed looked so cozy, I wanted to dive into and fall asleep. But I knew I had to figure out where I was and I did not want to waste any time. I only had a few days here, afterall.

I walked through the door from the sitting room and went into the bedroom. On the table beside the bed was what looked like a newspaper and a book of some sort. I sat down on the edge of the bed. It was as soft as it looked. I picked up the newspaper and the headline jumped out at me, making me gasp.

“Welcome Aboard! The Titanic Sets Sail!”

“No it can’t be,” I muttered to myself. I flipped the pages over and looked around. The date confirmed my growing fear. April 10th, 1912.

I gulped. I couldn’t help myself from starting to panic. Unfortunately, I knew that the fate of The Titanic was tragic. I remembered what the book in my grandmother’s basement said. This was a tragic tale. My heart was pounding heavily in my chest and I felt a throbbing sensation in my head. I had to make sure I got back in time, or at least did not die. It felt awful to think like this. No one else had the choice. No one else even knew. I realized though, that I wasn’t aware what day it was now. I could have another day or two before we sank. Or it could be tonight. I would have no way of knowing unless I risked the confused stares and asked someone what the date was. I decided it was better to just keep my eyes peeled for a date somewhere in conversation or on another paper. I wanted to know more, to learn more about what was happening and where I was, but I couldn’t keep my eyes open. My head hurt so badly. I crawled into the bed and fell asleep.

A few hours later I awoke to a hand gently stroking my cheek. My eyes fluttered open, not remembering where I was. I let out a small scream when I saw a dark-haired woman in a pastel pink gown staring back at me. The details slowly came back to me and I tried to gather myself.

“Oh I’m so sorry dear, I was in the middle of this awful nightmare. I was living in the year 2022. I was a young man in his grandmother’s house. Everything was lit so brightly, the colors were so different. I must have thought I was still there when you touched my cheek.” I felt odd throwing this information at her, but I wasn’t sure she would ever live to see the year I was actually from so I figured there was no harm done.

“Oh how dreadful. I wonder what life will be like that far in the future, don’t you?” She said as she lifted herself away from my face.

“Well it seems rather colorful and noisy, but somehow less elegant.” It seemed wrong of me to lie about what I knew.

“Well at least we have a lifetime of class and elegance ahead of us, don’t we?” She laughed as she spoke. “I wouldn’t want to live in a world that didn’t value the luxuries we have today.” She gestured around the room.

“I supposed I’d better get up and get changed for dinner and drinks then?” I asked her, now eager to experience everything. I only hoped I wouldn’t make a fool of myself as we spoke with other people. I did not know how I could communicate without knowing anyone’s name.

“Yes, let's get ready. I don’t want to be late again tonight, I hear Thomas is bringing along another group of new friends, so get ready for more boring conversations,” she giggled and then headed over to open a wardrobe filled with dresses, coats, and hats.

I made my way to another wardrobe, hoping it was mine. It was. I put on the most formal looking outfit I could find. I pulled on black dress pants, a white waistcoat, a bow tie (this part I fumbled with, but somehow managed to work it out), and a tailcoat. It all felt rigid, stiff and heavier than anything I was used to wearing. I was about to head out when I realized my other outfit had my pocket watch and my map. I ran over and grabbed them, shoving them in my interior pocket before my wife noticed.

I walked over to her and linked my arm with hers. She smiled at me and we headed out the door. I felt like I should be leading the way but was still unsure of where to go. I leaned towards her and whispered,

“I’m still not feeling fully myself, so forgive me if I forget which way to go. I may need your help appearing back to normal. I don’t want the other men thinking I’ve lost myself.”

“Are you sure you’re up for drinks then? And dinner too? You know you’ll get swooped into the smoking lounge after and I can’t help you there.”

“Yes I’ll be just fine once I’ve had something good to eat.” I squeezed her arm closer to mine and she led the way.

By the time we’d gotten through drinks in the lounge, I felt as though I truly was living in another century. Luckily, the conversation was mostly small talk of the weather, the ship, and the day's news. I was able to get away with not adding much, but was worried about the dinner conversation, as we had now covered most of the bases for what I could contribute to.

My wife leaned over to me on our way from the lounge to the dining room and asked, “Shall I let Thomas know you’re still not quite well and have him direct the conversation away from us?”

“That sounds perfect, please do” I squeezed her arm again before she pulled Thomas aside.

In the dining room we sat at a large, round table. Surrounded by many chairs framed in gold, with velvet-soft cushions. The table was set with fresh flowers, beautiful china, and so many forks, knives, and spoons, I didn’t know what to make of it. I glanced around as the night went on to determine what to do, which proved very helpful. It seemed like Thomas was an expert at keeping the conversation to himself, and he carried on throughout the whole meal, talking about things I’d never heard of.

I tried my best to savor every bite of food. We had so many different plates and so many options. I was overwhelmed but I was surprised at how lovely it all tasted. I tried to focus on the conversation while remaining quiet and polite whenever it passed to me. At one point I was asked a question about my hometown and whether I was pleased to be returning to New York. I started to speak but my wife interjected and spoke for us. No one seemed to notice this, which was a relief because I’d expected it to be controversial for the time period. I didn’t think it would be acceptable for a woman to speak for her and her husband, but I was wrong, at least here.

After we ate dinner and dessert and all shared more drinks, it was time for the men to retreat to the smoking lounge.

“What do you say, Jacob? Can you handle some time with us men or are you not feeling up to it?” Thomas asked me in a moment alone.

Truthfully I wasn’t feeling up to it but I longed to witness another moment in this time. I still was unsure of the date and how long I had here, but I had let the tragedy of it all slip my mind.

“I may be a bit slow, but I’m certainly up for it,” I said with a wink.

Thomas patted my back and led me down another long hallway and into the smoking lounge.

The lounge was a deep mahogany color and very ornate, just as every other room had been. It was filled with the smell of cigar smoke and the lull of men's voices. I had no idea what to expect and was nervous about what everyone would think. I tried my best to keep up with the conversation, though I didn’t add much.

At one point a question was asked of me and I started to choke up. I glanced at Thomas, not knowing what to say and he spoke.

“If you’ll excuse my friend, Jacob here, gentleman. He has just found out his wife is expecting and is a bit off his game tonight.” He laughed and the other men joined in on the laughter, some throwing out a congratulations my way.

I was shocked. I wondered if this was true. At first I was unsure of why this made me feel so flustered. Maybe it was because I was getting too swept up in this lifetime and it was starting to feel real. Maybe it was because my wife was so beautiful and the idea of having a family and a life in this era, with her, actually appealed to me in some foreign way. I was pondering this a bit when a thought struck me. It was because I knew our fate. And if she was pregnant, and did not make it, I would actually feel grief. How could I feel grief for a life that wasn’t even my own? For a family that wasn’t real?

I could feel a rumbling inside of me as I sat there contemplating all of this. I needed to walk. I needed to get some fresh air. I was getting too drawn into this world and it wasn’t even my reality. It was history to me. Yet here I was, living it.

I excused myself from the room and walked into the hallway. The smell of smoke lingered on me as I went out onto the boat deck. The chilly sea breeze stung my nostrils. I walked to an open area of the deck and stood there, looking around at the few people brave enough to be outside in the cold. They had no idea what was coming. But neither did I. I never managed to find out the date. I had no idea if tonight would be the night that the Titanic sank. I was almost as hopeless and innocent as the other’s on board.

I walked to an area away from the others and stared up into the night sky. It was stunning. The stars were brighter than I’d ever seen them, sparkling off the ocean’s waves. The dark sky contrasted the light of the stars and the moon so vividly. I will never forget that view.

I reached into my coat pocket and pulled out the watch. I ran my hand over the etching on the front and sighed. I still couldn’t believe this was actually real. I was partially hoping the pocket watch would end up being a normal pocket watch and that this would be my reality, tragedy and all. I flipped open the watch and saw the ticking hand and the shining gems floating downward.

I had almost two full days left. Seeing the amount of time left made me feel a little lighter. I convinced myself that if the ship were to sink tonight, the time traveling journey would have started sooner. It wouldn’t be right to throw someone into a story like this, only to face something so serious.

I closed the watch and felt the map brush my hand as I placed it back into my pocket. It occurred to me that I still had yet to open the map. I was reaching to pull it out when I felt a tap on my shoulder. I jumped a little and pushed the map back in my coat.

I turned and saw my wife standing behind me, looking up rather anxiously. I don’t know how I hadn’t heard her heels clicking on the deck floor.

“Jacob? Thomas said you’d run off after he dropped some news to the men in the lounge. He said you acted as if you didn’t know. Is everything alright with you?” There was a look of longing in her eyes.

“Oh yes. I just didn’t expect to hear it said in that setting I suppose. I don’t mean to act so oddly, it just feels as though my mind is in a different time zone” I gave her a small smile.

“Maybe it has to do with your dream? Or maybe you just aren’t cut out for the boat life.” She giggled at this part and I softened. Her laugh was adorable. Her smile was infectious. I needed to detach myself, but I didn’t want to hurt her.

She held onto my arm before she spoke again. Her touch was filled with love.

“You know Jacob, we don’t ever have to try anything like this again. Once we make it back to New York and start our new life as parents, we can settle down more. Stop traveling as much. I think it’s taking a toll on you.”

I nodded. “How many days are left anyways? I can’t seem to remember how long we’ve been out here.” I threw this question out, surprising myself. I wasn’t sure I really wanted to know, but in some way it seemed to help me feel a sense of detachment.

“Oh don’t be silly. It’s been four days now. Only a few left.”

My heart sank in my chest. My mind began to race. Tonight was the night. I tried to convince myself that maybe in this adventure, the story would turn out different. I couldn’t fathom another way. I wished I hadn’t asked. I had to make myself forget.

“Shall we go inside? It's getting late and I’d like to warm up a bit.” I asked her, trying not to sound desperate.

“I’d like that very much. It's freezing out here.” She smiled her beautiful smile and we walked inside.

By the time we made it into our suite it was after 10 p.m. I tried as hard as I could to not count down the hours. I hadn’t even begun to think about how I would return home, or whether I even wanted to. Part of me felt like my fate would be determined just like the rest of the passengers tonight.

We spent the next few hours laying beside each other in bed. Both of us were having trouble sleeping. It was as if she knew what was going to happen.

I was staring at the ceiling when we heard the first call. A siren went off somewhere in the distance. My wife turned to me, looking alarmed. My heart was beating a million miles an hour. I had to remember to find my way home. But if I did that now I would never know what happened to her. She’d be alone until the end. I couldn’t do that.

I squeezed her hand and kissed her forehead before taking one final good look at the room. It was marvelous. I breathed it all in and then took off to find out what was happening.

People were gathering anxiously outside. There were assumptions being thrown around, but one person in particular said it was an iceberg. I walked over to him and asked him if he had any more information. He was sure everything would be fine and that they’d fix up any holes or scratches in no time. I couldn’t rely on this.

I checked the time. It was almost midnight. If I remembered correctly, we only had an hour or so before it would be too late. I ran back to the room and grabbed my wife’s hand.

“We have to leave darling. The ship has hit an iceberg. It may sink, but not everyone is aware of that yet. Just act calm and follow my lead. We will be safe.” I tried to speak as gently as I could.

She looked terrified, but followed my lead. In no time we were up on the deck, in robes, freezing together. There were groups of people out here already, trying to assess the situation.

I shouted to a group of men who were beginning to lift lifeboats out under the deck.

“Is it too soon to begin evacuating women and children?”

“We’re working on it sir. We have to wait until Captain says to evacuate.” One of the men responded. “Should be any minute now judging by the size of this rupture.”

My wife looked terrified and confused.

“How did you know this was happening? I can’t get on that thing without you?” Tears were forming in her eyes.

“Yes you can, you can, and you will. You have to trust me. I will find you on my life raft with the other men. You and the baby need to stay safe. Trust me, please.” I was begging her at this point. I needed her to trust me and get in as soon as possible. I wouldn’t be able to find my way back home otherwise.

It felt terrible to lie to her but I had no choice. A few minutes later they started loading people onto lifeboats. She was the third woman to get on. Everyone was sobbing. I felt wrong leaving but I had no choice. I couldn't risk my own fate this way.

As soon as the lifeboat was safely away from the ship I had to go. I watched her for a moment floating out at sea, praying that she would survive.

I ran inside the ship and searched for an empty room. People were screaming, children were crying. It felt increasingly wrong of me to know I was escaping the scariest part of this night.

I found a small broom closet and shoved myself inside. I pulled out the map and the pocket watch. The watch was hot and the gems were glowing brighter than ever. I unfurled the map and saw a ship on it. The outline of the Titanic. There was a dotted line connecting it to a book with the number three on the front. The book was glowing. I didn’t understand what to do.

I held on tightly to the watch and the map. I pictured my grandmother’s basement. I had never longed to be in that room before the way I did now. I closed my eyes and whispered under my breath.

Please take me home. Please.

The floor shook underneath me. There were more screams from outside the door. Footsteps running in every direction. I ran my hand over the map, my eyes still closed. My fingertips hit the book and froze. It was hot. My hand suddenly felt glued to the page. A moment later I was whirling around in my mind again, seeing colors and then darkness. All the noises stopped around me. I could barely breathe. The movement stopped and I felt a thud.

I opened my eyes. There was a closed book on my lap. A pocket watch was laying on the floor beside my foot. A map was curled up in my hand. My grandmother was standing at the bottom of the stairs, smiling at me.