Feeling Human

At it again!, I thought. She’s at it again. Destroying his soft heart. Killing him inside. Hurting my very best friend.

My best friend Fry, that dumbass, sweet, naive, caring meatwad that I call my first and only true companion.

And of course, Fry had to be smitten with that purple haired one eyed “angel,” or so Fry calls her, the moment he saw her. Leela is a big pain in my shiny metal ass, to be honest. I know she’s technically my friend, too, but I am getting less and less enchanted by the idea of her holding onto the flooding heart of Fry so terrifyingly strong—only for her to toss it in the trash. Then, I see him trudging over to the Dump to retrieve it, brush it off, only in an futile effort to try and give it to her again and again.

Before I met Fry, I was utterly exhausted of existence. Bored and lonely and depressed. For some reason, when I met him and he wanted to be my friend, that changed everything. My whole lease on life was just… irrevocably changed. I was going to commit suicide that day.

It’s odd, ever since he’s been in my life, I never thought of anything like suicide ever again. It never occurs to me to not exist, especially since now I know just how much I mean to him. When I was in stuck out in space, Leela told me just how far Fry was willing to go and do to find me. She said even if it took his whole life, he’d spend it trying to find me.

That hit me so deeply.

And when I had to opportunity to come back to life after dying by scaring Fry to death(The Robot Devil made a deal with me, I still feel awful that I ever agreed), I ended up saving him in lieu of me coming back again. Yes, I told him I loved him out loud as I saved his life. I know Fry heard me too.

No, we never spoke of it afterwards when things finally got back to normal.

Now, after all we’ve been through together, we are closer than we’ve ever been. Hermes once called us a textbook bromance if he ever saw one, and though I laughed it off like a stupid idiot, that was the truest thing I ever heard that silly bureaucrat say.

So, we are still roommates and I hear everything going on in his room all the time.

I hear him when he laughs, sings, fools around trying to clean up his room, or…

When he cries.

I hear him crying. It makes me uncomfortable to hear it. I can’t stand it, I get so angry.

Leela again rejected his advances.

Why doesn’t the poor sap move on?

I burst through the door and say, “Get up. We’re going out.”

Fry frowns, wiping his eyes.

“O-out?” He asks in a trembling voice.

I nod and grab his hand and make him stand up from his never made bed. There were bags of open chips, Slurm cans everywhere and even old scrambled eggs on a plate near his nightstand. I scoff and say, “You gotta clean up this pig sty, meatbag.”

“Leela hates me. Doesn’t she?” He sighs, putting his hand over his face. “I’m just …ugly. I’m not ever good enough.”

I frown and feel a rattling in my circuits that make me feel like I should do something or say something.

Instead I just go back to hiding my feelings.

“Well, you certainly aren’t the most beautiful meatwad I have ever met, hehehe,” I laugh, but it sounds sadder than I intended. “You are actually pretty ugly! But even you can do better.” I say and he looks at me with a half smile, his eyes red. “Let’s go get a drink, buddy.”

I pat his shoulder, it’s too rough and he almost falls down. “Bender, don’t slam me so hard! It’s like you put all your weight against me!”

I feel a ping in my chest and it make me feel hot. Like I was overloading and needed to cool down.

“What a weird thing to say! To me. Bender. Okay!” I cough, and then get Fry’s jacket, handing it to him, “Get dressed. I know how you inferior humans can get sick if the temperature drops too low. Pathetic!”

Fry takes the jacket and puts it on over his white shirt, giving me the biggest smile ever, all of a sudden.

“Thanks, Bender. You’re the best.”

I roll my eyes. “Shut up.”

We go to a bar finally and we get beers.

“I just don’t understand why she won’t love me. You know?” Fry says, chugging his beer down fast.

“Because you’re a big slob with no respectable sense of setting your life goals, managing a home, or with a foreseeable career progression or prospects to better yourself? Yeah, I wonder why she’s not swooning yet!” I hate my barking tone. Why can’t I just be nice?

He gets another beer and nods. “Hmm, you’re right, I can see that.” He gets closer and says, “What can I do to change it?”

I shrug. “Don’t ask me. I’m not the human here. I’m also not the one going after a piece of tail that doesn’t want or need me.” I sigh, “Though I don’t understand what you’re going through. All the ladies want a piece of me. I have to fight them off!”

“Yeah,” Fry says in a bit of a slurred way, drinking his third beer in a quick gulp. “You are pretty good at catching ladies. How’re… go…how did you get so… smexy?”

I sigh and shame my head, laughing, “Go drunk, you’re home, Fry!” I grumble. He laughs loudly.

“I’m not drunk, I’m barely buzzed!”

“Yeah. And I’m the king of England, bud!” I say.

He suddenly hugs me and I feel hot.

“Ow!” Fry yelps, “are you sick, Bender? You’re burning up!”

“No! I’m fine,” I growl and look away from him.

“If only you were human, Bender. We could …” Fry starts, but bites his lower lip as I look at him.

“What? We could what?” I say, curious of the sudden change in his tone.

“Nothing. Thanks for taking me out.”

I shrug, “Yeah, yeah, whatever,” I say, drinking another beer.

The trouble is, Fry, I may not be human, but being with you…

I feel it. I feel human.

And that is good, I think. Good to feel this way with him.