Falling

I dwell on the border of the abyss. Above me is an eternal blue and below me is a pitch-black void. The great blue and the great black, stretch endlessly in every direction to which I roam for food and mate.

To those above me the abyss is a frightening unknowable place with strange dangers. While I have seen many sudden and peculiar things reach out quickly and grab a fellow fish; I am more terrified by what I can see above me.

Finless, they drift down slowly as blood flows from their bodies to the surface. The great blue becomes red. Some of them are still alive, writhing around frantically but falling just the same. Sharks, large and small but all with their sharp teeth and strong bodies. The sight of any causes an instant feeling of intense fear. Now they will be the food of scavengers. Many will float down into the abyss, perhaps feeding whatever lurks down in their deepest depths. But what creature throws these finless sharks as it cast its massive shadow down on me.

I have seen many more than I would’ve liked to. They come in many different sizes, many even bigger than whales. Yet, all I ever see is their underbelly... or what I assume is their underbelly. These beasts are so foreign to me. They puzzle me more than the large mouthless fish that travel between the surface and the abyss. Their skin looks like a peculiar smooth stone and they are able to shoot light. Whenever, I happen to see them they are always either descending into the depths or rising from them. Rising, always to meet with the great shadows.

The great shadows which send their webs down. They take anyone unlucky to be caught, no matter what size or what kind. They are the reaper from above, and now from the one above me, sharks fall from it.

Before I left my mother and was small, I would always follow her closely alongside my many siblings. Back in that time I was so vulnerable. We all were. Somehow though my mother was able to take care of us. A good amount were lost but that is the reality of the great blue. Most never make it. My mother did her best and quite a lot of us were able to eventually leave the reef. The reef with its immaculate and diverse color. It was alive and everything that dwelled in and around coexisted in a chaotic harmony. It could hide secret perils or be a safe haven. We, ourselves hid in it many times from the dangers outside. Often, the danger of a hungry shark.

I remember it so vividly. Me, amongst my siblings, huddled together under my mother’s left fin. Staring at the hole through which the light shone through. My entire body tensed up and I felt as still as coral. I saw it glide over as its shadow turned our hideout dark. My mother peered her head out ever so slightly. Quickly, she drew back in. Then I saw it. Through the hole I could see the shark had grabbed a sizeable fish a distance away. I saw it chomp down with incredible force as its razor teeth eviscerated its flesh. Then the others came. Other sharks seemingly emerged from nowhere and began ripping a piece of meat for themselves. They wrestled and shook the body from one another in pandemonium. It awakened a fear in me. A fear so deep it felt as if I had been born with it. Fear as natural as swimming.

There is nothing natural about this though. This confuses and terrifies me as I avoid the gasping snaps of vicious jaws passing close to me. For once, I can look into their eyes. I can see that they are scared and in pain. With all their strength they fight to survive as they fade into the dark and disappear forever.