Cumbersation
Small talk rendered impractically heavy/stuck/weighty due to the baggage or truths divulged by your fellow conversationalist.
May it please the Court of the Silent Cardrive Home: I shall identify myself as 'A', and your brother-in-law Mick, whom I hold responsible, as 'B':
Begin Transcript:
Setting: That fusion place where every dish tastes the same; the one that's excessively loud.
A: What a delightful meal! Excellent choice! Do you eat here frequently?
B: Yes, it's great! We used to come here more often, but then Jasmine revealed she was seeing a therapist nearby to cope with her profound fear of spending her life with me. Luckily, her mother's move to the nursing home forced her to reevaluate our relationship, realizing the security in it. She says, "Once passion fades, a steady paycheck is better than a doorway." So I get to revisit this place on date nights!
A: *pretending to be engrossed in the table's candle* This... seems like one of those wax candles, don't you think? Do you suppose they use wax here?
B: Tonight, I might get to sleep under the sheets.
A: *fierce internal noises*
B: Hahaha, this is great fun. Thanks for joining us on our wedding anniversary.
A: *eats the candle*
End Transcript.
May it please the Court...your honour...baby: I hereby plead not guilty to the charge of 'Being an embarrassing arsehole' due to mitigating circumstances. I submit that enduring such cumbersation without severe emotional distress is beyond reason, and I request a verdict of innocence, and exemption from future dinners with Jasmine and Mick.
I rest my case.
About the Creator
Conor Darrall
Short-stories, poetry and random scribblings. Irish traditional musician, sword student, draoi and strange egg. Bipolar/ADD. Currently querying my novel 'The Forgotten 47' - @conordarrall / www.conordarrall.com
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More stories from Conor Darrall and writers in Fiction and other communities.
A Treasury of New Words and Terms for Burned-Out (Adult) Children
Greetings and Welcome, language lovers. Following the Neolomicro Challenge, I was left with a lot of bizarre definitions that I thought might give some of you a chuckle. These are the offcuts that I ran out of time / inclination to pursue. I hope you enjoy them, and that they can be the start of a glorious new dictionary for these beleaguered times.
By Conor Darrall6 months ago in Fiction
Hall of mirrors
Things used to matter, before all the noise. And at that time when things still had meaning, there had been dreaming too, when dreams still mattered. And the brightest dream from those times was full of mountains and seas and smiles and the types of passion that absorbs you the way a dog is absorbed by witnessing something for the first time: with absolute presence, and awe.
By Giulia Viti3 days ago in Fiction
Comments (3)
Very cleverly done, your word is spot on. Case dismissed.
Hahahahahaha this was both disturbing and hilarious! Loved your word and poem!
Loved it!!! The word is fantastic!!! I love the excerpts of the trial!!! Superbly written!!!