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Annalee

The Dance

By JBazPublished 8 months ago Updated 8 months ago 4 min read
16
ZDENT

An explosion rips a hole in the side of our ship, the outer shell disintegrates as a vacuum is created and begins to crumple the structure like paper. There is no chance for thought as I am sucked out into the vastness of space. If I wish to be an optimist, I could say that I am a lucky one, as I had my suit on me before we were so rudely evacuated. Many were not, their bodies float aimlessly along with the debris. Expressions of fear, frozen on their face for an eternity.

After several moments of useless ranting, I tire of hearing my own voice screaming inside my helmet and resolve myself to a peaceful death. For the moment I am transfixed by the beauty around me, odd I know, but space is beautiful. I am immersed in a waterless ocean, floating in a divine embrace of the unknown. An ethereal glow surrounds me, makes me wonder why it takes dying to appreciate what was always there.

I feel a grip on my arm, the feeling is so unexpected I shiver. Turning to my right another body floats by, grasping onto me as if I were a life preserver. I stare into this beautiful face of someone I recognize. Her name escapes me, she works in the engineering department. I know who this is because I wanted to ask her out but could never find the courage. So, for over a year all we did was smile at one another in passing.

It appears we will be together at the end, is this what people call ironic?

We begin talking to each other, then laugh, realizing the other cannot hear our words. Our communication systems do not work, they were linked through the ships computer and judging from the floating debris, I think it is safe to say we no longer have that ship. That’s okay, staring into her green eyes is the next best thing. We manage a smile of relief, knowing we are no longer going to die alone. Wisps of her luscious auburn hair poke out from beneath her cap, fluttering within her helmet. Her hair was the first thing I remember, it caught my attention. A fella could get lost in those curls...I wanted to be that fella.

I should have asked her out.

She doesn’t object when I tether us together. Glancing around she gestures to what is left of the ship and taps her ring finger, placing a hand over her heart, I shake my head and point to her, mirroring her action. She shakes her head as well. For a moment we are motionless, still trying to fathom this new reality of ours. Suddenly she taps my visor, spreads her arms wide, her face beaming, there is wonder in her eyes, and I realize she sees the beauty in space as well. She is amazing, no tears, no sadness, no self pity, only acceptance.

On impulse I squeeze her hand, feeling a slight pressure in return, this contact is more than I can have hoped for. Floating together amongst the few survivors, yet we are alone. We move as one, dancing in the dark ballroom of space. Twirling amongst the stars we move to the music in our heart. In this moment I feel more alive than I have ever felt in my life. She gently brings her hands up and holds my helmet, leaning forward, the tops of our visors make contact, as if our foreheads touch. I hold her head in my hands, we close our eyes and imagine…

When I open them once more I see her focusing on my air gauge, which is half full. I glance at hers. It is nearly empty. Without thought I begin to disengage my hose to hook onto her tank, she shakes her head. Her hand gently pulls mine away from the hose and wraps them around her waist. We return to our waltz, holding each other like an elderly couple having their last dance together.

I cannot hear a sound but a red glow, warns us that her time is coming to an end. We stare into each others’ eyes; she smiles the most beautiful smile I have ever seen and mouths the words ‘thank you.’ With no warning she unclips the carabineer to the tether and pushes against me. We separate and drift away into the blackness. My arms frantically reach for her, knowing it is futile. I watch as she raises her hand in farewell and begins a slow tumble, growing further away until she is no more than a silhouette against the brightness of the moon.

‘Annalee, her name is Annalee.’

Thank you,

Jason Basaraba

For the ' Unspoken challenge'

This was an excerpt from another story I wrote. I extended the moment and added to 'their ' story, with a few adjustments. I have attached the original if you wish to read more.

MicrofictionSci Fi
16

About the Creator

JBaz

I have enjoyed writing for most of my life, never professionally.

I wish to now share my stories with others, lets see where it goes.

Born and raised on the Canadian Prairies, I currently reside on the West Coast. I call both places home.

Reader insights

Outstanding

Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!

Top insights

  1. Compelling and original writing

    Creative use of language & vocab

  2. Excellent storytelling

    Original narrative & well developed characters

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Comments (14)

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  • Dana Crandell7 months ago

    Well done, Jason! An awesome challenge entry.

  • Cathy holmes8 months ago

    Beautiful story and great take on the challenge.

  • Mariann Carroll8 months ago

    This is a great take on the challenge. I felt I was part of what was going on. I love how you describe space very surreal feel to it . I was very surprised how it end. Maybe a part 2 the met again in space in time another dimension?

  • Lena Folkert8 months ago

    Wow. This made me cry. I think the entire story so beautifully paired with the challenge. Not just their inability to speak but the environment. It is meant to be appreciated in silence. Truly beautiful. Good luck. This one’s a fave 🥰

  • Omggg, in my mind, I was just thinking what a beautiful story this is. So heartbreaking yet so beautiful. But I was shocked to know it's an excerpt of a story you wrote last year. Even more shocking is that I've read that story and commented my favourite part of it. My memory is so bad that I don't remember any of this. I have to reread your original story to refresh my memory! My most favourite part of this story was their dance in the dark ballroom of space!

  • Mark Gagnon8 months ago

    Great entry for the challenge! I think the setting is perfect for non-verbal communication. Good luck, Jason!

  • L.C. Schäfer8 months ago

    A terrific take on the challenge! My favourite bit was "dancing in the dark ballroom of space" 😁

  • Babs Iverson8 months ago

    Spectacular story & story telling!!! Lovrd it!!!❤️❤️💕 Superb entry for the unspoken challenge!!!

  • Dave H.8 months ago

    A nicely-concocted story. Superb writing,... Do you mean 'rips a hole... ' or 'rips a whole' in the first line?

  • Donna Renee8 months ago

    😭😭😭 what a gorgeously written story!! “An ethereal glow surrounds me, makes me wonder why it takes dying to appreciate what was always there.” ❤️❤️❤️

  • Test8 months ago

    Oh my. This is so beautifully done. I was absolutely mesmerised from the line 'Expressions of fear, frozen on their face for an eternity' Exquisite 🤍

  • Judey Kalchik 8 months ago

    I hope that I have the presence of mind, when I come down to my last moments, to leave a gift of love with someone else. This was magnificent.

  • Alex H Mittelman 8 months ago

    What a sad space story! Great job!

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