HARD Kombucha-

The alcoholic beverage companies have been laying it on us these past few years with all the varieties of hard seltzers from the colorful list of brew companies we once thought would be the cause of our "beer guts'" demise. Calor ies have gone missing, flavor has been infused, and the onslaught of our friends making jingles up about each of these seltzers have tickled our ear hairs...

"No laws with the claws!"

"Fact-I need 'nother cacti!"

Etc., etc., etc....

"But what about our gut bacteria (sad pandas)?", the healthy lot of us have asked as we continue to destroy our insides and assume the position with adding in pre and probiotics each next day.

What's this?! Kombucha that has a...higher...content...of...alcohol...

Oh you mean, the BEST of both worlds...our DEMONS alongside our HEALTHY-CONCIOUS DRINKING MISSION?! Maybe.

Now, while I am not yet a scientist...(working on it) can we realize that those of us who drink Kombucha see it as an added health benefit with many varieties of them in and of itself?

Many people try hard Kombucha thinking they will be healthy while indulging in a vice. The truth is that many are already healthy before this idea comes to mind. Being so, I have noticed from my personal accord-you definitely don't feel terrible the next day after one too many of these magical concoctions. That ALONE is enough to entice the average "boozey" one.

Not to mention-with this particular brand pictured above from my local grocer (Green Zebra-holler! via Portland, Oregon), the flavors described for the varieties available are surely impossible sounding. Once you sip, of course, you'll agree it is indeed those notes/flavors. If you haven't already, give the "Midnight Painkiller" a dose. The label says to flip the can to activate the charcoal? Yeah-there's CHARCOAL waiting to be activated. Kind of a neato "adult" activity to include such craftsmanship. GET CRAFTY B*TCH.

Some will ask "Is this drink a contradiction? Doesn't alcohol destroy our gut bacteria? How can it have probiotics and a higher amount of alcohol without killing the bacteria in the drink before it enters our temple?" While I definitely do not have the answers to these types of higher thinking questions I too have asked myself, feel free to agree to disagree, or whatever. I am currently on the side of this deliciousness(...at least until I decide I need to go to AA).

WHY BOTHER?

Most of these drinks have a HIGHER PERCENTAGE of alcohol than the notorious seltzers, so if you're curious as to whether or not they'll get your beak wet, well...check. The flavors have more in-depth notes than the seltzers...check. They're GLUTEN-FREE for our allergy sensitive or mindfully conscious of their gluten intake types of friends (less tequila and havoc on our liver)...check! RICH IN PROBIOTICS...F*CKING CHECK.

OPINION: I have found HARD Kombucha. Or it has found me. I don't condone pressuring anyone to purchase a controlled substance that is legalized, but I do declare! This drink has got to be the LEAST BLOATING, best-after-you-empty-the-can, worth-while purchase I've digested in a long time.

In regards to the above mentioned brand, their website upon further investigation, seems to offer some pretty good deals cash money-wise for those of us who love a good bargain when attempting new temptations. The spirits are alive with this one! Probiotics, essentially.

Kombucha in general, you love it or hate it. Here in Portland, we have Kombucha breweries. One of the many reasons I live here-the obscurity and reachable vicinities that implore the residents to try new things.

Invention of Kombucha was great, nuanced, intriguing to many across the world, but HARD Kombucha has swung into full effect more recently! Now, there's a variety of brands of this of course (who wouldn't mind getting in on the ground running with this magic carpet ride?). The ones pictured here are from the latest collection I have been loving...please drink responsibly. XOXOXX.