Your Life Will Change

Growing up in a big family with sixteen kids running around really gives you a little insight to what it is to be a mother, or so I thought.

First of all, pregnancy is a crazy thing and confusing time, especially for first time moms like me! Every single thing you do makes you feel like you’re either helping or hurting your baby. “Did you forget to take your prenatals?” Oh no! You’re a horrible Mom! “Did you eat a bowl of fruit this morning?” Yay! You’re the greatest human ever! Like seriously you rarely feel one emotion long enough to settle in it.

And then the time you have been waiting for and dreading arrives! Yes, giving birth, but then it’s not even remotely close to what you thought it was going to be. Thankfully for me it was pretty smooth and easy going, yet there are some women who simply go through the worst pain ever and some even take days to have their babies. And the scary part is that you can never be sure about how things are going to play out. As exciting and dreading giving birth is, it is simply the best experience a woman can have.

For me the worst thing was NOT my pregnancy, was NOT giving birth, but my gosh it was the whole postpartum thing! I swear I thought I was never going to feel like myself ever again! I mean two months later I still don’t feel like I’m completely myself. My body ached like crazy for two weeks, I felt like I bled forever, the lack of sleep is just wow, and let’s not to mention sore breasts from breastfeeding. Yet, the best thing was being able to spend uninterrupted time with my baby and all his smiles. Honestly I think the worst thing ever was having to go back to work and leave my little for a few hours a day.

Being a first time mom has your mind spinning like crazy, for me anyway. You never know a hundred percent of the time that you’re doing things the “right” way. And let’s not forget to mention that everyone has a darn opinion about everything you do! Of course people shouldn’t matter, especially if you don’t know them, but it still makes you feel like shit and more uncertain than you already were.

Let me tell you this: When someone tells you that your life is going to change over a child, they are completely correct. Your nights are no longer about full on romance with your partner, it’s not a get up and go whenever or wherever you want, bottom line it’s not just about you anymore. Does that mean to let yourself go? Does it mean you should no longer have friends? No it doesn’t! It just means your spontaneous last minute plans are not going to seem so great anymore.

Having a child is no easy task no matter where you live or how much support you have. You will always feel uncertain about things and Google will become your best friend. Your life will change not just because your body and schedules change, but because you’ll learn to love a little human unconditionally and you’ll find yourself just wanting to hold them all day every day. Your heart will always feel full and when you have an awful day at work and come home their smile will wash all of that away.