Why I Love Coffee Culture

I do love caffeine!

Like many over 40s with kids and a packed week, I rely quite heavily on caffeine to perk me up and get me through the 'joys' of domestic life. Let's be honest, making packed lunches, pairing socks, and doing homework with a reluctant seven year old isn't exactly what dreams are made of, but there's no point in kicking and sulking (no-one would even notice, anyway), so you either reach for the bottle, or you grab a coffee! (Or two, or three...)

I'm lucky enough to work part-time from home, and over the years, I have come to really see the benefits of cafes and coffee culture in general.

New Mother's Haven

The life of a new mum is fairly boring. Before my daughter came along, I had been a busy, focused and successful English teacher. I was used to deadlines, banter with colleagues, a structured day, and a good wage! In the blink of an eye, life as a new mum became a drudge of dirty nappies, a fuzzy head, lifting and hauling all that baby equipment (the stuff these wee people need is crazy!) and not one iota of control over the day, or even an idea of what the tiny person would throw at me. (Think volcanic nappies, teething and a baby who dropped her day-time sleep aged one!)

Once I got used to hauling half-a-house load of 'baby stuff' out with us, and once I became fairly efficient at it (trust me, you never forget a dummy, a nappy or a bottle for a second time.) I began venturing with my sweet little woman to places with actual other people around. I was less afraid of the crying noise, and felt more able to soothe her. (She was just ALWAYS hungry!) I soon found I could relax in high street cafes, especially the fairly busy, roomy cafes, where you served yourself and could move furniture around to fit in a pram and the enormous nappy bag. I didn't feel very noticeable, and there would usually be lots of other mums and babies, probably there for the same reason: to get out of the house, and away from the clutter of baby stuff, unfinished housework, and the four walls.

Luckily, my daughter was normally asleep in those early years, having been soothed by the movement of the car and/or pram. I found I could actually read a book, or browse the internet, and actually have a hot drink, not just a half-finished lukewarm drink. If I had stayed at home, there is no way I would have taken 30 minutes or so to myself. I would have felt obliged to do housework, or other jobs, and the chances of my nosey baby being asleep were slim-to-none.

All Day Service

My Mum told me that when I was a baby, cafes only opened for breakfast and lunch, and were closed in between times. The establishments didn't like you to linger, but really just eat, drink and go, so that they could clear up and serve someone else. Nowadays, however, high street and little independent cafes usually open from 7am until around 4pm. And unlike back then, when I was little, you can really sit for as long as you like. I see lots of people with lap-tops, doing work; with newspapers, just enjoying a leisurely read; chatting in big groups; having meetings with a client. It seem that cafes are a wonderful space to do more than just drink coffee.

You can buy breakfast porridge, a scone, a vegan sandwich, a biscuit, or just have a coffee, a herbal tea, a sparkling water. The setting and the menu is casual, and I like that. I feel pressurised in places where there's a set lunch menu, and where there is only table service.

Lonely Hearts

I don't always go for coffee alone. Now that my daughter is at school, I often meet my mum, a friend, and sometimes I'll see a neighbour and I'll join them. I live in a small town, and although it can be a curse sometimes, I think it's actually more of a blessing. We have several cafes, and I like to think that if someone is ever feeling lonely, they can get dressed and head out for coffee (Or tea. I'm not against tea!) and they're quite likely to bump into someone they know, out for the same reason.

I often find myself wondering about the elderly men and women who sit down by themselves, and I think, I'm glad they have this place to come to. Would they otherwise be sitting at home, over-thinking and watching day time television?

I love to see groups of older men or women, chatting and laughing in cafes. Often, I will see the same groups, who have probably arranged to meet that same day every week. Many are probably widows and widowers, and in an age where mental health is a major issue, I can't help but think that this must help, somehow. An hour or two laughing and chatting in this space, on a cold, dreary grey winter's day, must really lift people who might otherwise have stayed home alone. I found myself worrying about those people when cafes offered take-away only during lock-down. People like that aren't there for the drinks; they go for the company, even just being around people sitting at different tables, and as a reason to get up and get dressed.

So, the next time you go for your caffeine fix, have a look at the people around you. Are they really there for the coffee, something they can easily make at home? Or are they there for another reason.

I want to celebrate coffee culture. It offered me somewhere to go as a new, lonely mother, and I still go when I feel unable to concentrate on work at home. Somehow the buzz helps me to focus on creating my next lesson, or to annotate a poem.

Tomorrow, I am meeting a friend I haven't seen for a very long time. And guess what? We're going for coffee!