The most important four words for a successful marriage: 'I'll do the dishes.'
Intimacy is so much more than you may realize
The dictionary defines intimacy as Closeness between people in personal relationships. It's what builds over time as you connect with someone, grow to care about each other, and feel more and more comfortable during your time together. It can include physical or emotional closeness, or even a mix of the two. I take note that the official description does not mention sex but this is what popular society has come to believe.
A spur-of-the-moment decision was never my style or a great talent of mine and one I went out of my way to avoid. Skiing was my favorite pastime. On this one occasion these two conflictive tendencies came to a provocative debate within me. While I was fortunate enough to live in a province with some of the best skiing in the world, the accessibility for this addiction of my highest pleasure was totally reliant on my friends and family. On this trip I was having some anxiety considering the travel companion I had chosen. The trip was planned with my brother, Ryan, and my sister-in-law, Beth, weeks earlier. My anxiety was not with these two, but with a young man, Terry, whom I met at a casual gathering with friends. Our indulgences seemed to be of like minds and as the conversation turned to my obsession, the invite became an automatic gesture for me. Shortly after the words were formulated I started to rethink this offer. Once they were out and with the acceptance of the invitation, we worked out the arrangements for the daytrip.
Next Year, Paris
When the fortieth anniversary snuck up on us ten years ago, we laughed off the fact that we hadn’t made any special plans to celebrate. It wasn’t that we’d forgotten the day; we forgot the milestone–another decade completed.
Is it over?
It all started having suffered a traumatic brain injury on February 17, 2018. I was a long haul driver and was traveling home from an extended trip from the east coast. They told me that if I didn't travel a certain way home that I would lose my job. I knew that traveling I-70 would save me time and wouldn't be such a hazard, but instead I was told that I needed to travel north through Iowa to I-94 to make my way home to Yakima, WA. The rest would be history, as I would later find out in a hospital 3 1/2 hours from where I stopped that I had suffered the brain injury I just mentioned.
The Dunmow Flitch
Great Dunmow is a village is Essex (half way between Bishop’s Stortford and Braintree) that owes its fame to a custom that has been running unbroken since the 12th century and which is mentioned in Chaucer’s Canterbury Tales. Married couples are put on trial to prove the strength of their marriage and, should they convince a judge and jury, win the prize of a side (or “flitch”) of bacon.
Start writing... December 10, 2018 She was looking adorable, more extraordinary than usual. Her elegant face with a million-dollar smile flickered her innocence. Her eyes were deep, mesmerising and pretty as lotus petals. They were sparkling and full of joy and happiness. Her halfly curled hair was tied loose. It was falling by the side of her neck, back her ears and down the shoulder. She was looking beautiful in that white dress with a bouquet of white lily flowers.
Fate Brought Us Together
There I stood, next to a Celtic Priest, surrounded by family in the great hall of an Irish castle. Waiting for my princess bride to climb the stone steps and walk through the archway so we could be wed.
Date of Good Tidings
It’s a warm summer evening on a night when the moon is set just right. It’s not a full moon, yet one would think it is with its bright LED glow, I sit on my back patio petting my pooches that thrive on my attention. Without warning, “Dance Monkey” by Tones and I shouts my phone to life, startling me out of deep thoughts. It’s the key to my heart, the other half of my soul. Sounding seductive and full of confidence he invites me to a surprise dinner announcing he’ll be pickling me up at six. With excitement and delight, I get dressed aiming to please, for he is that special someone after all. As he pulls into our driveway, the thudding of his favorite Spanish song replaces any honking horn any day. As he climbs out of the car with the music increasing as the door slowly opens, one would think a heavy weight champion was being introduced as he bravely approaches the ring, and I am the ring. Hugging me and greeting me with his welcoming kisses, lets me know I have chosen the right outfit for this unexpected dinner date. Walking me to the car, he slowly opens the door and guides me into the passenger seat, for I’m his queen after all. Watching him walk in front of the car to get in on his side only empowers me to tell him lets skip dinner. His Burberry smell only makes me wish dinner was already over. Our drive to where we are going only gives me lust for my husband’s touch. I’m excited, while at the same time I am disappoint of the not knowing. We arrive at a place called Flemings, and I all I can do is wonder. My love must sense it, for he informs me that it’s a steakhouse and wine bar. We exit the car walking to the front door, as he softly guides my lower back with his hand. With a greeting from the hostess, he responds our last name. After receiving an invitation of this way, we follow the young women to a private booth for two, where a single votive candle softy provides light. Immediately red wine is poured into our glasses, in which all it takes is a sip to know it Merlot. Once again, my king has done well. He’s selected everything to my liking from the place to eat, to the flavored drink. This place is new to us and for some special occasion he’s chosen it from the usual places. A special occasion indeed, for as my love makes a toast to us, he informs me of good tidings this special night. A promotion has brought us here and after tonight, our hopes and dreams will hopefully start coming true. After ordering our food, we sit and remanence of our earlier times together. It’s hard to believe sometimes that we have been together for five years. We have gone through some rough patches, but we’ve pulled through. After looking back, we decide to take another toast to this. As I take my last sip from the glass of merlot, our dinner arrives with a prime rib steak, mashed potatoes, and vegetables. The smell that radiates from the steak only makes me hungrier. The food is to die for and before we could finish, the waiter asked to bring us something else to drink, we both decide to go with a glass of water this time. Once we have completed our meals, and enjoyed more talks of remanence, we ask for our check. After the waiter returns with our bank card, we decide it’s time to return home. On our way home, my love drives slow as we intake the fullness we have just endorsed. Once home, my gorgeous man directs me to wait for him, as he exits the car to open the door for me. He gently tugs me out of the passenger seat to a warm embrace that conjoins us up to our front door and inside where only our secrets reside.
According to the National Domestic Abuse Hotline, it takes six to eight times to successfully leave an abusive relationship. Each attempt to leave has a 75% risk of getting killed in the process. Think of this the next time you hear someone say, “Why did they stay in such a toxic relationship?”.
Pictures are indeed worth a thousand words.
I met my husband in April of 1976 when he was 18 and I was 17. I was tired of guys always teasing me about being skinny and yet on the flip side trying to get into my pants. I was harassed constantly for being a virgin and told that I was "scared." This only made me more determined to find someone who appreciated me for not giving it away. When I met Michael Preston he shared that he had already had 2 girlfriends who had babies that were not his and he was looking for a girl who had not given it away to every guy and who would be faithful.
“They were made for each other,” John said, as he looked in the bedroom mirror to straighten his tie. “It’s like they’re both out of a former century; neither one of them has a clue how to romance someone in modern times. They’re both so nerdy and hopeless.”
Merlot is off the menu
Merlot is off the menu. Imagine your best first date. What would it involve? A quiet glass of Merlot in the brand new and very fashionable wine bar? A steak dinner? Wearing that little black dress or may be something glittery and clingy borrowed from a friend? A night at the disco? A beach picnic? Even an hour or so at the bowling alley. Any of these could be fun and romantic.