Metaphysical Maternal Lineage

Our mothers are our life givers, generators, organizers and dispensers. As babies, we go to our mothers because they are our nurturers, our story tellers. Not to say that our fathers are not important, they are our providers, but in a world where patriarchy exists and women are looked down upon, Shelby is creating and building a positive connotation about the power of a woman and feminine energy. Once you tune into your femininity, it’ll give you an even greater sense of who you are and your roots of where you come from. There’s great power in it.

Shelby was born of 3 generations of maternal masons. Her great-grandmother, Lillian Lewis, was born around 1910. She was part of the Heroines of Jericho and the Order of the Eastern Star. Lillian was known as a highly respected, strong black woman, a grand worthy matron that wore beautiful robes, crowns, jewelry and fine regalia for both organizations. Lillian was tapped into her abilities as a psychic and read tea leaves. But one day she read her own tea leaves and it frightened her to the point of never wanting to read tea leaves again. She was a high priestess that everyone adored and loved. Most likely from her certain connections.

Since Lillian was born in the early 20th century, she didn't really know her birthday month and day, due to it being lost in the records because of the times, so she gave herself the incarnation date of January 1st, 1912, the day of New Years, based on the Gregorian calendar. But peep all those <ones>, she knew who she was.

In 1937, Lillian was a groupie of a well known jazz band, where she met and married her husband, Ed Levine, who was a piano player of the band. Lillian and Ed Levine were in love even though the country was in a recession at the time. One Spring night of 1940, while traveling with a group of her friends from a club where her husband had just performed, Lillian's car with her group of friends and husband fell into a ditch on the side of the road. There were no streetlights, no police help, or no AAA towing service. They had to rely on themselves and their car headlights. The car was a heavy late 30s automobile, but they faced adversity and all pushed the car out of the ditch, even pregnant Lillian, being the strong wild woman she was, helped as well. Pushing the car stressed Lillian to go into labor, Shelby's grandmother, Eddie Mae, was born prematurely on March 27th, 1940. After that Ed and Lillian started caring for baby Eddie Mae.

It is now 1943, in rural Brenham, Texas, with its large rolling hills and its dirt roads. Eddie Mae, now a toddler, was in the living room playing with dry pinto beans on the floor. Her grandmother, Ida Bullock Warford, noticed her and told her to “stop putting them beans in your mouth”. Ida yelled at her again because she continued to put the beans in her mouth. That loud voice startled Eddie Mae and a bean got stuck in her throat which cut off her breathing. She began to choke and fell over. Everyone turned around and began to realize what was happening. Chaos erupted and everyone started screaming frantically. A white German family that lived across the street noticed, in the confusion of what was happening, ran across wondering what all the commotion was about. Seeing Eddie Mae laid out on the living room floor, the family, along with Lillian and her mother Ida, immediately took Eddie Mae to the “whites only” hospital, the only option to save her life, which was 10 miles away. A 3 year old and driving 10 miles with a bean stuck in her throat should've been dead by the time they got to a hospital. Upon arriving at the hospital, the doctor said, “We can't let this baby die... but we’ve never done a tracheotomy”. Lillian, coincidently, worked for the doctor as his house-keeper and he knew baby Eddie Mae. In Brenham, Texas, 1943, Dr. Roger Conalli never performed a tracheotomy. He had only read about it during his medical school training, so against all odds he performed the surgery. It was a great success. After the surgery was performed though, baby Eddie could not stay inside the hospital due to the racial climate of the day, so they cleaned out a janitorial shed and a makeshift room was created so she could receive post-op meeting. The nurses hand Dr had to teach Lillian how to perform all care for Eddie Mae because no white nurse would care for a negro baby. Imagine the environment of the shed and how unsanitized it'd be, or the amount of infection that could occur. At this moment in time, anything could have gone wrong. Baby Eddie Mae, Shelby's grandmother, survived and still wears the scar on her neck to this day.

Reflecting upon the chronology of it all, Shelby's grandmother should not have survived. Choking on a bean, the drive to the hospital, surviving throat surgery, being cared for in an unsanitary environment, with no advanced surgery techniques, tools or medical technology. A few years after that incident Lillian moved to Los Angeles with Ed and toddler Eddie Mae.

Growing up Eddie Mae was in various car accidents from childhood and into adulthood. She could've died at any point and we as in my mother and I believe that she's really not supposed to be here due to her many near death experiences. She truly has been a cat with nine lives for without Eddie Mae, Shelby, her mother and brother, would not be here. We were all meant to be here in this moment at this time.

It is now the sex, drugs and rock and roll era of the 1980s. Lillian was high in status of The Black Heroines of Jericho as well as the Order of the Eastern Star in Los Angeles, California. Eddie Mae was initiated into the Daughters of Isis, a female group of Egyptian Temple Mystic court No. 5. Eddie Mae grew an interest in mythology and astrology, Lilyana Muslar was in the youth group of the Daughters of Isis and the Order of the Eastern Star. Lilyana is into palmistry and eclectic Hoodoo witchery.

Lilyana was born in a hospital, she was spoiled and always got what she wanted, she even came close to being a great Journalist, as well as even as close to fame. But that wasn't her true destiny.

In 1980, Lilyana was a model in Los Angeles. She, 5’3 and at the time, very petite. This was a time the model industry was looking for women like her because when she walked, she owned the stage like it was nobody's business, all eyes were on her and the scouts took interest in her. One day, on the way home from modeling school, she was on the bus after having thought her mother forgot to pick her up. As the bus got closer to home, Lilyana saw an ambulance, fire truck and police cars. The policemen were guiding traffic. There had been a really bad car accident. As the bus drove past the accident she realized her mother was one of the victims of the accident.

On another occasion, she was invited to a mansion party, and was taken into a room to be evaluated by the industry's elite white men at the time. After being taken into many rooms, they brought her into one last room, where the scout asked, “What will you do for me to become a well known model," hinting and suggesting that she has sex with him and his fellow members. This didn't sit well with Lilyana and she followed her intuition and left. Life goes on for Lilyana. She moves to Texas to attend university only, to find out Lillian, Eddie Mae and Phillip (Lilyanas first born son) decided to sell their vintage 40s house in Los Angeles and move back to Texas of 1990, my mom was confused at the time because she wanted to come back home to Los Angeles after she was done with school, but again, that wasn't Lilyanas destiny, she meets and marries a man named Rodney Jackson and one child from this union was conceived.

Shelby was born on October 17th, 2000. As a child, Shelby would have weird dreams and she would also see and meet strange beings, animals and shadow people in her states of sleep. Due to system and television programming, she lost the ability to connect with her dreams lucidly, but she always knew there was something more to life than just religion and the patriarchal system in which she has to maneuver around as a young black woman. Due to Lillian’s psychic ability, the nine lives of Eddie Mae and Lilyana’s eclecticness Shelby has always been aware, and highly intuitive. You can never try to be fake around Shelby because she will see right through you, she will either call you out on it, or protect her energy by distancing herself. If your energy resonates with her, she’ll stick around and will give you the best deep conversations, adventures, lighthearted playfulness, and innocent flirtation. She's very kind and empathetic, she’ll listen to you to the point where sometimes it drains her energy. But don't get her wrong, she doesn't take anybody's shit and can be very blunt and honest. She's righteous, and a seeker of the truth. She doesn't like her time wasted, she's often looked upon as intimidating by the amount of energy she radiates and by the way she carries herself. She is aware that she comes from a long line of musicians, builders, master navigators, healers, oracles, and ancient bloodlines of royalty. Shelby is guided and protected by her ancestors, those who come before her, especially by her great grandmother, Lillian Lewis. With that comes a price. Shelby doesn't have too many friends, she often gets lost in her thoughts due to her nature to overthink, she finds herself in the oblivion of anxiety and depression. Sometimes she explodes with anger and rage, most times she's cold, numb and distances herself from people and reality in itself to be alone and isolated in nature, smoke weed and listen to music. With the current issues of the planet, as well as being an empath, life can be cruel with harsh lessons, thought patterns and behaviors.

In conclusion, Shelby is at the beginning of what will become a deep journey into finding her truth. With hopes of finding others that vibrate at the same frequency as she, all while being looked down upon by society because she is Black and a Woman, working hard to manifest her highest reality, she too will survive. Shelby also realizes how powerful she is, to know where she comes from and the roots of her feminine energy she embodies just by being born through a bloodline of past healers, mystics, musicians, psychics, and intuitives. Most people don’t realize who they are, they just run amok with no sense, like the “dumb, deaf and blind”. It’s understandable because they don’t ask questions about who they are on a physical and spiritual level. Most of the masses follow a structured traditional religion and don’t think outside of those paradigms. Knowing thyself is an ancient Egyptian principle. It’s hard to come to terms with your habits, let alone take the time to reflect, heal and work on them. Sometimes, you are the negative person bringing toxicity towards others. You are the shadow and the demon. But you must not let that drag you into the darkness, you should be able to be confident and face your darkness. One must take a step back and look at themselves from other perspectives. Try astrology and numerology for those deep questions of “who am I” “Why am I here and what am I to do?”

To know yourself is to go deep within, isolate and reflect on the thoughts that flood and floor your mind. Are they positive or negative? Do you know why you're here on Earth at this time? Do you know what your purpose is? People tend to run away from questions that conflict with their sense of self and their ego, leading them into lower vibrations, they start going into harmful habits to distract themselves. I've been through this many times like I'm in a time loop I mentioned at the beginning. I have a lot of deja vus and it feels like time is going backwards, or as if time is repeating in a way, but I just can't grasp in somehow. But if you have parents, grandparents, or great grandparents that like to tell their life story; listen to what they have been through so you know that whatever you’re going through, you can get through it compared to the experiences of those that come before you, your elders and ancestors, especially maternally.