Life Is Changed, Not Ended.

It was a gloomy day. August 9th 2018. The day I lost the one person who understood me best.

My grandfather was a man a very few words. He was born in Fulton, Kentucky. He served 28 years in the United States Army as a E8 Sargent. He enlisted at 18 years old. Shortly after, him and my grandmother were set up on a blind date. A marvelous blind date if I must say, as he flew her to Hawaii. From there was history, she moved from her home in Louisville, Kentucky to travel the United States with him. While serving, my grandmother blessed him with three children. My father was the second born child, first born son. He served two tours in Vietnam, three tours in Germany, and one tour in Korea. Once he retired, he and my grandmother made their way back to Kentucky. The settled in Louisville for a time. There, he took a profession as an insurance agent. They would then, find their selves in Knoxville, Tennessee. His next stop on his journey, would be where he stayed, Newport, Tennessee. He then married his second wife, and had his fourth child. In Newport, once he retired as an insurance agent, he became a self - employed business owner. He had several offices in multiple counties across East Tennessee. He won a battle against Cancer in his time as well. He had a total of four grandchildren, and two great granddaughters. I was the second to the youngest of his grandchildren, but the closest to him out of my cousins. As I get older, I'm beginning to realize we were similar in subtle ways. We would text from time to time. Never passed up an opportunity to have a conversation with him on the phone. He lived about an hour away, and always had. My favorite was the surprise visits! It never failed, he wouldn't mention it. He would wait until he was about 15 minutes away, call and say he was stopping by. He somehow always knew when he could catch us. I always engaged in conversations when the chance was at hand. Always accepted his lunch, or dinner invitations. In the time before his health declined, I always thought I spent as much time with him as I could. We would text from time to time. That unfortunately, wasn't the case. Perhaps it never is, for anyone. I sit over two and a half years after he has passed with so many wonders. Full of the questions I didn't ask, or didn't think were important enough to ask. I honestly do not think I ever considered that as I was growing in age, he was too. My grandfather was a man always in motion. Moving on to the next task, anything to occupy his time in a positive way. He volunteered in more than 3 organizations, at 82 years old, faithfully. He never stopped. I was granted 20 beautiful years with him, yet it wasn't enough time. I never wanted him to suffer in pain, as he deserved peace. Maybe, I could have used the time I did have with him wiser. Maybe we go through life, with little to no direction in many things. We are always on the go, everything seems rushed, mediocre. I loved my grandfather dearly, he was my rock. Looking back now, I wish I would have planned my time with him. Put the phone down, the texts, social media, all would remain. However, he would eventually not. Its the little things, good and bad. Hug your grandparents close. Talk with them, even if it is something you absolutely cringe at, I promise you that will mean more to them than anything. Ask questions. Be present, always. I hope, whoever comes across this, gets a sense of comfort. Even if it wasn't a grandparent for you. Deaths time, is not, and never will be our friend.

In Loving Memory of James "Jim" Ross Barker Sr.