Honoring A Mother: A True Boss

How does a child honor their mother on Mother’s Day? You tell her story the one no one wanted to hear. My mother Della Moore was born very ill to a mother who already had a child and was doing her best. The doctors said she was not supposed to live past the age of six, but she lived well into her 30s. During that time, she had her first child at 16, and to be the best mother she could she dropped out of school. She moved to Memphis with her sister and her husband where she met my father shopping one day. They fell in love, married and they welcomed 1 more boy and 2 girls making their family of 6 complete. From an early age she taught me to be strong because of her illness she couldn’t do many tasks but that didn’t mean she sat around and waited for someone to do it for her. There is always a way to get things done. For example, she was not able to drive but she always got to where she needed even if we took the bus and I helped her put my sister and the stroller on the bus. Her strength proved throughout her life not just for her illness. From day one people looked down on my mother because of her illness, lack of education, or how she chose to live her life. People always had something to say but she let me know quickly and early that those are just words. People are going to talk about you to the day that you die but never let them get to you, push forward, and do what you need to do. Since I lost her at the age of 6 the gums of people’s mouths have flapped but I never paid what they say no mind. Secondly, she taught me to never give up because she never stopped pursuing her education. Though she dropped out of school she understood a great education creates a foundation for where a person wants to go in life. She enrolled herself into a G.E.D. program and got her G.E.D. When she was alive, she made sure I knew how to read and write before I started Kindergarten because she never wanted her children to face her same struggles. I have fond memories of waiting by the mailbox to get the book from my book club to read to her and my father. In everyday life, I have never been happier that she taught me to swing on my words in my writing. She helped me realize I wanted to be a writer. In being a writer, a writer needs to be prepared and this lesson she taught me well. My mama had seizures regularly and we needed to know what to do when they happened. Training a 3 almost 4 yr. old and 1 yr. old how to take care of you when you have seizures is no easy task. I remember the drills we had to do just in case we needed them, and we did NEED them. I remember having to grab a spoon and putting it in her mouth, so she never swallowed her tongue, so she didn’t suffocate. If the seizure lasted longer than a couple of minutes to call my father at work so he could call 911 and if we could not get him to call 911 directly. This a lot for young children to remember but we did it because/for her. Now I use this training differently I always have what I need when I write and if something goes wrong I have a backup plan. I am always prepared because of her. Lastly, before she left this earth, she taught me to treat others the way I wanted to be treated. I mentioned earlier that people mainly family said ill will things about my mama. She never deserved any of it. Even though family treated her cruelly she welcomed them with open arms. She never turned anyone away if they needed it and she had it, it was theirs. Everyday was something to celebrate even if something terrible was happening. After her passing, I grew up to look just like her and when I face those people that were cruel to her, they see her in my face and can’t face me because of this. It is like they are reaping what they sowed. In turn, I try to remember to treat people well as mama did because we are better individuals when we do. My mom was my best friend I never talk to many people as a child. I was very shy, but I could always talk to her about anything. She always let me know no matter what is happening she would always be my listening ear and she had time for me/siblings. For example, when beauty and the beast came out, we watched it about every day. I know she must have been tired of it I recently watched it myself with my nephews and realize this was no easy feat. In addition to this, even if I didn’t feel like talking sometimes, we would just play, and I would imitate her. For example, if she was cooking eggs in the kitchen, I was cooking fake eggs and sometimes real eggs in my pretend kitchen. She made me the happiest kid on the planet with her love, hugs, playtime, and cookies. I try to use this lesson with everyone but especially my nephews I try to let them know I always will have time for them and that I will always listen to them no matter what. My mother worked so hard in life another lesson she taught me because she was sick, she was unable to work in an office space, so she became our neighborhood candy lady and worked for herself. She sold candy, chips, freeze cups. You name it and she had it. When she had her own business, she taught me that you always make your own way regardless of the circumstances. She was so friendly and resilient that after her passing adults I did not know told me while I was growing up how much they missed her. She was the best role model I could have ever had even with the short amount a time I got to spend with her. If I knew what I knew now I would have loved and hugged her so much more. After her passing I did my best to take these lessons to not only use them for the things I mentioned above but for all aspects of my life. These lessons have helped me become a better sister, sister-in-law, and aunt. My mother was so smart, strong, courageous, kind, fun and always prepared. I one day hope to be just like if not better than her. Each day I pray that she is proud of me and smiling down on me from heaven. I know I was supposed to pick one lesson, but I couldn’t just pick one each one of these lessons and many others help me become the boss I am today. Mama thank you for teaching me how to be a true boss no matter what. I hope that you feel honored not just this Mother’s Day but every day.