Victoria Moore
Bio
Just a woman trying to publish books to make people happy.
Stories (4/0)
Shuffling Around Weird Places
Growing up I never felt like I belonged anywhere. I know the case of the Emo loner kid. The problem with the original profile is that it's usually some skinny white kid going through some angsty loner time. However, I don’t even fit the bill there. I am a big fat black kid who just wanted to belong. I am the black sheep of my family. I have always been naturally quiet, shy, glued to a book or weird show. My family never failed to let me know that I didn’t belong. Why aren’t you normal they would ask? Or what are you going to wear today let me guess something all black and a hoodie? They would laugh so hard, but it would hurt so bad because no one ever made fun of what they read, watch, or wore. So, when I had my cd player I never felt more at home or like myself. Most emo music videos felt like my life. Picked on for something stupid or overlooked for something crazy. Yep, that was me the emo black chick with the cool blue cd player. My first time hearing one of my favorite songs was when I was getting yelled at by my aunt. She said, “You don’t dance, don’t work, have any extracurricular activities how you expect to make it Victoria?” I didn’t say anything at the time out of respect and fear of getting kicked out of the house. She stormed off and I sat on the bed I literally heard something similar to the argument I just had with my aunt. “You like d&d, you can’t dance, and you can’t do karate how do you expect to make it? I don’t wanna make it I just wanna…. The intro to I’m Not Okay by My Chemical Romance I was hooked instantly so much so I almost missed school that day. I never heard someone speak like me or act like me. I was so thrilled that I found a genre of music for me. I HAD FOUND MY PEOPLE!!!! I’m not a hero I’m just a girl that’s it. Now that I found this band, I needed more hooked like a kid on phonics I searched for more music. I discovered Panic! At The Disco next with I Write Sins Not Tragedies I loved it instantly the weird themes the lyrics it was everything. A Fever Who Can’t Sweat Out is my life’s album. The lyrics, beats, and melodies on that album is insane. For example, in the song There’s A Good Reason These Tables Are Numbered Honey, You Just Haven’t Though of it, Yet Brendon says I’m The New Cancer I Never Look Better And You Can’t Stand IT. That line is such a confidence booster for me then and now. It helps me keep my chin up even if I’m having a tough day. Every time my heart got crushed it was to MCR and P!ATD I rushed. Speaking of feeling inadequate especially around boys since I was a fat chick no boys looked my way except for when it was time for those boys to make a joke with their friends. Yes, because I am a big girl, I have no feelings, or desire to be with someone ever very funny guys. That’s when I discovered Fall Out Boy’s Sugar We’re Going Down as a young lady this song had everything I was thinking. I’m just a notch in your bedpost I hate to say this but sometimes I wanted intimacy so bad I did want to be a notch in a guy’s bedpost growing up, but this music helped me realize I should want more for myself. I discovered All American Rejects their songs Dirty Little Secret and Swing Swing called out to my heart. Though I wanted more for myself I still wanted a guy even if I had to be his dirty little secret which ended up with me having a broken heart. I would listen to Swing Swing every time too It took me a while to learn this lesson that I deserved more. Once I got this down packed, I fell for a guy that I saw a future with well as far as a 16-year-old girl could think anyway. I discovered Yellow card’s Ocean Avenue which is not just a good song but a terrific album. Though, I could not speak to him most days and when I felt like that, I listened to Avril Lavigne’s album Lets Go particularly the song Things Ill Never Say because I was so shy, and I wish I weren’t. Anyway, once I got the nerve to talk to him, I felt like Ocean Avenue was to be our song to run away to however that was not to be the case since he graduated and moved on without me. I went through a rough patch after that I would listen to Jimmy Eat World Sweetness, and The Middle it helped me remember that life can be sweet, and I’m not left out of things they will happen when they are supposed to happen. In turn, I wanted to have rebellious like Sum 41 in Fat Lip and Good Charlotte in The Anthem. Green Day made me feel like I can take down the government with the American Idiot album. Songs such as Holiday, American Idiot, and LetterBomb had me feeling invincible. My family saw it as a phase a weird one, but I was hardcore. In turn to dealing with school and boys, I mentioned family earlier that they made me feel like an outcast, but they also put more responsibility on me that they shouldn’t have. For example, taking care of their kids. I lived with my aunt and cousins since my dad was going blind, he could no longer take care of my sister and me. So, since I lived with them, they thought they could just do whatever they wanted and live me with their responsibilities. When I felt like it was too much to bear, I would listen to Simple Plan a lot of songs such as I’m Just A Kids, Welcome to My Life (I spent a lot of time crying to this one), Perfect (this one too), I’d Do Anything, and Shut Up! (more things I wanted to say but no gall to say them). I did my best to do whatever they wanted so I kept my mouth closed and my head down until I graduated high school. Later on, I got MCR’s The Black Parade album, it spoked to me because people have always put pressure on me about my mom’s death and carrying on the family name. I have no intention of having children, but this album said what I wanted to say to my family. The music that I grew up listening to help me be the cool person I am today. I learned it is great to feel empowered but have a direction with your empowerment. I chose to use my voice to write awesome stories and remember where I came from through the memories these songs created help me understand where I am going. A just think this all started over an argument about me cleaning my room and how I expected to make it.
By Victoria Moore3 years ago in Beat
Honoring A Mother: A True Boss
How does a child honor their mother on Mother’s Day? You tell her story the one no one wanted to hear. My mother Della Moore was born very ill to a mother who already had a child and was doing her best. The doctors said she was not supposed to live past the age of six, but she lived well into her 30s. During that time, she had her first child at 16, and to be the best mother she could she dropped out of school. She moved to Memphis with her sister and her husband where she met my father shopping one day. They fell in love, married and they welcomed 1 more boy and 2 girls making their family of 6 complete. From an early age she taught me to be strong because of her illness she couldn’t do many tasks but that didn’t mean she sat around and waited for someone to do it for her. There is always a way to get things done. For example, she was not able to drive but she always got to where she needed even if we took the bus and I helped her put my sister and the stroller on the bus. Her strength proved throughout her life not just for her illness. From day one people looked down on my mother because of her illness, lack of education, or how she chose to live her life. People always had something to say but she let me know quickly and early that those are just words. People are going to talk about you to the day that you die but never let them get to you, push forward, and do what you need to do. Since I lost her at the age of 6 the gums of people’s mouths have flapped but I never paid what they say no mind. Secondly, she taught me to never give up because she never stopped pursuing her education. Though she dropped out of school she understood a great education creates a foundation for where a person wants to go in life. She enrolled herself into a G.E.D. program and got her G.E.D. When she was alive, she made sure I knew how to read and write before I started Kindergarten because she never wanted her children to face her same struggles. I have fond memories of waiting by the mailbox to get the book from my book club to read to her and my father. In everyday life, I have never been happier that she taught me to swing on my words in my writing. She helped me realize I wanted to be a writer. In being a writer, a writer needs to be prepared and this lesson she taught me well. My mama had seizures regularly and we needed to know what to do when they happened. Training a 3 almost 4 yr. old and 1 yr. old how to take care of you when you have seizures is no easy task. I remember the drills we had to do just in case we needed them, and we did NEED them. I remember having to grab a spoon and putting it in her mouth, so she never swallowed her tongue, so she didn’t suffocate. If the seizure lasted longer than a couple of minutes to call my father at work so he could call 911 and if we could not get him to call 911 directly. This a lot for young children to remember but we did it because/for her. Now I use this training differently I always have what I need when I write and if something goes wrong I have a backup plan. I am always prepared because of her. Lastly, before she left this earth, she taught me to treat others the way I wanted to be treated. I mentioned earlier that people mainly family said ill will things about my mama. She never deserved any of it. Even though family treated her cruelly she welcomed them with open arms. She never turned anyone away if they needed it and she had it, it was theirs. Everyday was something to celebrate even if something terrible was happening. After her passing, I grew up to look just like her and when I face those people that were cruel to her, they see her in my face and can’t face me because of this. It is like they are reaping what they sowed. In turn, I try to remember to treat people well as mama did because we are better individuals when we do. My mom was my best friend I never talk to many people as a child. I was very shy, but I could always talk to her about anything. She always let me know no matter what is happening she would always be my listening ear and she had time for me/siblings. For example, when beauty and the beast came out, we watched it about every day. I know she must have been tired of it I recently watched it myself with my nephews and realize this was no easy feat. In addition to this, even if I didn’t feel like talking sometimes, we would just play, and I would imitate her. For example, if she was cooking eggs in the kitchen, I was cooking fake eggs and sometimes real eggs in my pretend kitchen. She made me the happiest kid on the planet with her love, hugs, playtime, and cookies. I try to use this lesson with everyone but especially my nephews I try to let them know I always will have time for them and that I will always listen to them no matter what. My mother worked so hard in life another lesson she taught me because she was sick, she was unable to work in an office space, so she became our neighborhood candy lady and worked for herself. She sold candy, chips, freeze cups. You name it and she had it. When she had her own business, she taught me that you always make your own way regardless of the circumstances. She was so friendly and resilient that after her passing adults I did not know told me while I was growing up how much they missed her. She was the best role model I could have ever had even with the short amount a time I got to spend with her. If I knew what I knew now I would have loved and hugged her so much more. After her passing I did my best to take these lessons to not only use them for the things I mentioned above but for all aspects of my life. These lessons have helped me become a better sister, sister-in-law, and aunt. My mother was so smart, strong, courageous, kind, fun and always prepared. I one day hope to be just like if not better than her. Each day I pray that she is proud of me and smiling down on me from heaven. I know I was supposed to pick one lesson, but I couldn’t just pick one each one of these lessons and many others help me become the boss I am today. Mama thank you for teaching me how to be a true boss no matter what. I hope that you feel honored not just this Mother’s Day but every day.
By Victoria Moore3 years ago in Families
The Tale of the Mysterious Fortune
Some people want fame…... Some want love…... Others want money… I just want to get out of this crappy job and survive this year. It’s the year 2021, we’re in the middle of a pandemic. The world is crumbling, people are crumbling…. I am crumbling. Every day I used to get up get dressed, speak to my nephews on their way to school and go to work. I had a perfect life, perfect writer job, perfect bachelorette pad. Then everything went wrong, and everyone got sick. Black-16 happened. They called it that because once you are infected with it everything starts to turn black everything but your skin that is. Starting with your eyes and lungs. Your eyes slowly go from white to a solid black and as your lungs turn black you cough up a strange odorless black liquid. Next, it spreads to the rest of your organs and this liquid comes spilling out of every orifice including pores. Lastly, you die from drowning in this black liquid. The illness is airborne and can be passed on by touch as well. Everyone in the world was so afraid of this disease that people started losing their jobs including me. Now I’m working this shotty department store job because everyone was scrambling for work and it’s the best thing I can get. I had to give up my house for a dinky hole in the wall because it is the only thing I can afford. I lost many family members, friends, …… the love of my life to this disease. It is a miracle that I have not gotten it yet. I pray every day that I don’t get it.
By Victoria Moore3 years ago in Horror