Good-bye, Mom, the University, and data centers

Mom,

37 years have passed. Yet, the image of a tear rolling down your cheek as you exhaled your last breath is not something that can be forgotten, Mom. 1989 March 21.

Time passes.

Life happens.

Memories accumulate.

I spend a lot of time on philosophy, analysis of life, and writing.

Losing Randy, you, and Michele early in all our lives wasn't fair. We know that life isn't fair from multiple painful experiences. You have to move forward the best you can regardless of all that happens.

About a dozen different essays about what you've missed have formulated in my head this week. Maybe I'll put it all together later, but not now. Generally, it's been a long haul since 1989. Life is not a bowl of cherries. Well, not fresh, edible ones anyway.

You do what you can, when you can, and try to let the rest slide.

We have to look for the light and strive to improve individually whether society is a disaster (it certainly is) or not.

We need more of the positive on this planet. It is possible with effort, discipline, humor, empathy, and dedication. Maybe enough people to make a positive difference will realize this soon rather than never.

Highlights...

I found a few photos (below and cover photo) of a nice day associated with good memories. Fighting Illini Homecoming and Homecoming Court 1988. I was honored to represent my graduating class.

Your grandchildren and great-grandchildren are the best part of the highlight reel. You'd have loved to meet them. They are each amazing in their own unique way. ❤

My three grandchildren will have a new baby sibling, due on 6-7. That's a thing now, 6-7. Since you had me in 67, we were ahead of the curve.

I think the best one can do is take a minute to focus on the highlight reel occasionally while moving forward. Laugh a little. Dance a little. Let the struggles fade. Learn from the mistakes. Leave the stress at work. Regroup in peaceful surroundings. Repeat. Days...weeks...years pass both quickly and slowly simultaneously.

Has it been that long? Seems like yesterday.

TD

PS: I am wearing a sash with "Purdue" on it in the photos because the University of Illinois Homecoming Court during those years was decorated to represent the 10 schools of the Big 10, with the king and queen wearing the Illinois sashes. Go Illini!

Author's note: That's how we spent spring break of my senior year at U of I (at the hospital cancer center then dealing with final arrangements and a funeral). Mom was diagnosed with breast cancer ~2 years earlier, went through treatments, and was okay for a while. During fall semester of 1988, my senior year, she was diagnosed with cancer again. This time, it was in her brain and spinal fluid (as I recall). She got through the winter reasonably well, but the cancer wasn't operable and treatments were futile.

Part 2, the decline of the university.

Dear committee members,

Please take into serious consideration the declining state of the campus, especially the Built Environment at UIUC, when selecting the next president.

The past president and chancellor have allowed conditions to deteriorate in many facilities, allowed inferior buildings to be built via faulty delivery methods, and overpopulated the campus beyond our ability to care for it and house students, faculty, and staff appropriately. They apparently also ignored the no net square footage pledge of many years ago. Our rank among peer institutions regarding deferred maintenance (aka backlog of maintenance and repair) is poor.

Our sustainability efforts are little more than lip service, especially when a climate agreement is signed by someone whose career is anchored in one of the most damaging technological sectors to emerge yet.

Recent administrations also turned campus into what looks like a billboard farm. Not longer do we get Illini jackets. Instead, we get what looks like racing suits covered in sponsor logos that make it impossible to identify the core institution. Commercialization and desecration of a revered war memorial for those who died in service to our nation are also unacceptable. A recent campus online presentation regarding decline in Illinois brand recognition is concerning. I believe that obscuring the campus behind sponsor logos and vanity plates for the wealthy is a major contributor to that problem. We need university administrators who will communicate that giving with humility and grace is the right way to live. The hubris displayed by those requiring their names to be displayed above and before all else is alarming, and it is opposite the values purported to be communicated, taught, and promoted by Illinois.

Life should not be advertised as a competition. We are not here to best each other or glorify self-promotion.

Life should be modelled as a collaboration in which people work together to change the world in positive ways delivered with humility and grace in the spirit of congeniality.

That is what I learned as an undergraduate student at Illinois. It is what I further learned to embrace as a graduate student at Illinois. It is a key part of the philosophy I have developed through decades of adulthood, including many years working as an employee in multiple roles at Illinois as well as two other universities.

Lastly, please consider fellow Illini and true leaders for this influential position. During recent decades, university administration across the nation seems to have devolved into a revolving door system where those admitted into the system are simply repeating the same rhetoric and promoting the same agendas and mindsets at every university. They don’t stay long on average, and they change allegiances overnight. At Illinois, we have unique attributes, history, assets, success, and talents that must be recognized and incorporated in the governance and operation of our university. Campus administration is not a one-size-fits-all endeavor. This applies to the president, chancellor, director of facilities and services, and many other administrative roles. It’s time we return to doing what we do best and install those offering true leadership in lieu of generic, milquetoast, and business-as-usual campus politics marked by self-promotion and elitism. Our campus is suffering from a lack of true leadership. We need a fresh start with vision that includes establishing a plan leading toward a truly sustainable and viable future for Illinois.

Thank you for your time and consideration,

Thomas , Illinois BSME 1989, MSME 1991

THOMAS DURBIN, PE, LEED AP

SENIOR MECHANICAL ENGINEER

Engineering and Construction Services

Facilities and Services

Part 3, data centers, university, and sustainability.

A long, detailed conversation about the direction society is headed and the truth of real sustainability is long overdue, not only in regard to data centers, but in regard to all aspects of life and lifestyles. We can do well without huge data centers by concentrating use of computing assets, especially supercomputers, on scientific research instead of internet nonsense. Urban sprawl, aquifers, energy consumption, overpopulation, and more need to be addressed simultaneously in a definitive manner if any real progress is to be made.

Data center proliferation is only one of many huge topics we need to address as a community, state, nation, and planet.

It's health and the environment that matter most, not an arbitrarily defined economy, when formulating a plan for the long-term survival of every species and life on the planet in general.

Thomas Durbin, P.E., LEED AP

former Facilities Manager of National Petascale Computing Facility,

current member of Energy Efficient High Performance Computing working group.