For My Mother on Mother's Day

Mother's come from a special place before we are born. Like a pocket of wisdom, genes incapsulated in us with breadth. Patience, understanding, guidance and warmth are what mothers are made of. Maybe it is because I never had a sister that my mother was the go-to person for anything advice. I always trust her. Mothers deserve more than a day to honor them.

My mother came from a line of Irish women (Reid), her mother was orphaned as a child and came from Ireland to be raised in Canada by relatives. Her father was Irish, English and also had Scottish roots (Miller). With a hint of the Spanish. The "black Irishmen," are those who include some Spanish in their genes and have the natural black hair. In a family of flaming redheads, that is my mother, with one of two other siblings with the black hair, fair cream skin and blue eyes. A natural beauty, straight nose (I inherited my father's nose obviously), barely ever wearing make up, with just lipstick and mascara looked like a movie star.

She was raised in Nova Scotia in a very small town called Oxford which maybe had 100 homes when she was a child. One grocery store, one gas station, one Sears department store with "everything," (I think every sized town had a Sears store at one time), and the pharmacy doubled as a movie theater with the big screen on the opposite side of the building.

My grandfather was a Fire Chief and handy-man and a great gardener with a "mini-farm," that he tended by hand. My grandmother raised nine children at home and was a bit of a natural healer with herbs. They lived in a cosy two story house. I remember visiting as a young teenager. The kitchen was the biggest and main room. A seating bench along one wall, a table and a huge wood-cook stove that served to heat the place as well as cook and bake on. Everything was home made then. A large sink that also bathed the babies in (back before anything would think twice about that), and refrigerator. A back living room with small television set and radio and sofa and embroidery on the chairs. This small room I imagined was for when parents need "me," time away from nine kids. The upstairs had bedrooms, one for the girls, one for the boys, and parents. Comfortable and practical, this was downhome Canada once upon a time.

After high school she got a job in the office of the department store. Later wanting to see the world a bit moved to Ontario to work, where she met my dad while he was in the military. She always maintained that East Coast Charm and if you have ever been to the east coast in Canada you know what I mean. Always smiling, ready to greet someone with warm words of welcome and knowing always the right thing to say.

My earliest memory is watching her mouth the words as she read me books. Devoted to motherhood she taught me how to read books before I was 5 years old and went to school. She was from an era when domestic goddesses were envied. She volunteered at church and school, the house was always spotless as were the kids and she never had a hair out of place. She ran the CWL for all of Ontario with natural administration and organizational skills. When there were new families in the neighbourhood she taught Portuguese children how to speak English at the school while she didn't know a word of Portuguese language. She adored children and it was like a life calling for her and had two foster children too when we were young.

I admire my mother for those things and she is my best role model, even in her senior years. One day when I move and have a car I will be able to see her more. I just wanted to share her with the world by writing this.

We all take our mother's advice to heart and here are a few pieces of wisdom I found I could not live without.

Mother's Best Advice

• Don't sit with one leg over the other knee or it will put pressure on your bones and you will feel it in your later years...absolutely correct.

• Never chase after a man, if he wants you he will come to you...yes!
• Always have a hobby, it will be something to appreciate forever...and she is correct.
• Never use the words, "ugly" or "hate," it's unbecoming...and she is correct (the acquired use of the occasional "f" bomb she does not understand and it will immediately conclude a conversation, yikes).
• Be a perfectionist at everything because in the end it's only you that will care about it that much...and she is correct.
• What matters more than education or career is family and children...again, she is correct.
• Always look your best, it doesn't matter what other people think but it will always matter to you...correct.
• Use person-centred speech when greeting someone and it will make them feel at home. Politics nor religion nor health matters, it's "how are You?"
• Read, read books. If you want to learn about anything or just for entertainment - read books...as always she is correct.

It's those little things of advice that make our lives loving. Countless times she has been there for me and I hope to be the same for her too, once I get on my feet. I love my mom, love yours too.

(I have more pictures, I just have to upload them).