Building Strong Relationships with Your Preteen

"My son is not paying attention to me."

"I'm not sure how to handle my daughter."

"My son is constantly engaged in online games. If I force him to continue. He is furious with me"

These are all complaints from the majority of the parents.

Raising children can be a challenging task, especially when they are between the ages of 10 to 13. At this stage, kids are in a transitional period, moving from childhood to adolescence. It is a critical period where they need more guidance and support from parents and caregivers.

In comparison to our childhood, today's children are growing up in a high-tech world with a high IQ. Exploration of the world is now simple for them, which has both positive and negative consequences.

Here are some tips for raising your children.

Set clear boundaries

Kids of this age need rules and boundaries to guide them. Set clear guidelines for their behavior, such as household chores, bedtime, and screen time. Make sure they are aware of the consequences of breaking the rules, but do so gently and with care, taking into account their biological changes at this age.

Listen actively

It's important to actively listen to what children have to say as they begin to form their own opinions and ideas, even if you're busy or the child keeps saying the same thing. Encourage them to express themselves and share their thoughts and feelings. This will help you understand their needs and concerns better. Avoid beginning your advice each time; they might get bored. Sometimes, too much advice will cause them to overlook important details as well.

Provide positive reinforcement:

Kids of this age crave approval and praise. When they do something right, praise them; when they do something wrong, correct them with affection and care. Praise their efforts and accomplishments, no matter how insignificant they appear. This will help them to determine the ideal choice in deciding on the next level.

Encourage independence:

Allow your child to take on age-appropriate responsibilities such as time management, homework completion, keeping their room and cupboards clean and organized, and caring for their belongings. This will boost their self-esteem and confidence. It is our responsibility as parents to teach our children about their responsibilities, even if you only have one child. Because over-caring can cause children to rely on their parents for even minor tasks. Maintain open communication: Create a safe and non-judgmental environment where your child feels comfortable discussing sensitive topics. Encourage open communication, and let them know that they can come to you with any concerns or questions.

Spend quality time together:

In today's fast-paced world, it's easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle of everyday life. With both parents often working, it can be challenging to find time to spend with family. However, it's essential to remember that we work for our families and that spending quality time together is crucial. Whether it's playing board games, watching a movie, or taking a weekend trip, these simple activities can strengthen the bond between parents and children. So, it's important to make time for family activities and prioritize them as much as work and other obligations. By doing so, we can create memories and meaningful connections that will last a lifetime.

Set a good example:

Children learn through imitation, so it's essential to be a good role model for them by demonstrating positive behaviors such as kindness, respect, and responsibility. Your actions speak louder than your words, so it's important to avoid negative behaviors such as smoking, drinking, or lying. One of the biggest mistakes parents make is thinking that their negative behaviors won't influence their children, but children often learn through imitation. Therefore, it's crucial for parents to be good role models and demonstrate positive behaviors and values. It's more important to teach children positive things than to avoid teaching negative behaviors. So, be a good teacher and a good person, and instill positive values in your children.

Finally, dealing with children aged 10 to 13 necessitates patience, understanding, and support. You can help your child successfully navigate this transitional period by setting clear boundaries, providing positive reinforcement, encouraging independence, maintaining open communication, spending quality time together, and setting a good example. Keep in mind that each child is unique, and what works for one child may not work for another. As a result, tailor your approach to your child's needs and personality.