A Life Saver

A Life Saver

“Thank you all for coming to celebrate Timothy Sr.’s life. I would like to express my deepest condolences to Mrs. Walker, Timothy Jr. and all of Timothy’s family and friends who share our grief. My name is Samuel Trainor. Many of you know me as Sam. Timothy, known as Big Tim to everyone, and I have been best friends for 22 years and we have been partners at LIJ Medical Center for almost 15 years. When Mrs. Walker asked me to give the Eulogy, I was honored and grateful that I had the chance to share 22 years of Big Tim’s life with him. Big Tim and I met in High School, and at first, we didn’t get along because our personalities were so different. He was just Tim back then and he was such a nice guy; always so helpful with the teachers, with our classmates, and even to the strangers on our bus ride to school. Me on the other hand; total opposite. He would always argue with me and tell me that I had no home training and that if his mom was my mom, she’d get me straight. After years of hearing that, I guess Tim sort of straightened me out himself because I made it through High School and I like to think that he also taught me how to be a nice guy. When we graduated, Tim enlisted in the Army where he served in Operation Dessert Storm for 3 years. We wrote to each other as often as we could and he never let an opportunity to tell me that he was grateful for my letters, pass him by. When I became an EMT, Big Tim always said to hold a spot for him because when he was done saving the country, he would come back and save our community. That’s the kind of guy that he was. Always doing selfless things without a second thought. He always wanted to make everything better. Even as a teenager in High School, he’d talk about how he was going to get his mother out of the projects and into her own home. I remember the day that he came back from the Army like if it was yesterday. Mrs. Walker, his Auntie Jackie, his girlfriend Bernice and myself all drove up to the base with such excitement. We were so happy to have him back in one piece and all we could talk about was everything we imagined he would want to do first. One of us thought he’d want to relax for at least a week. Mrs. Walker said, “I know my Timmy baby; he’s going to want to go straight home and eat some of momma’s food”. As we waited on Tim, we were so engaged in conversation that he snuck right up on us, grabbed his mom so tight and started swinging her around. Mrs. Walker was right; first thing out of Tim’s mouth was that he wanted some of her famous oxtails. If you knew Tim, you know how he got down with them oxtails. Less than a week had gone by since Tim had been home and he had already gotten a position as an EMT at LIJ with me. He couldn’t wait to start doing something meaningful in his community and saving lives was the way he wanted to do that. We worked the night shift, so there was a lot of down time and that’s when Tim and I would talk. Then him and Bernice and Little Tim and he was in love with that boy. All he wanted to do was make Lil Tim and his mom proud. Everything was about them. When Little Tim came along, he wanted to be an even better person. He wanted to be the best at everything and he wanted to keep learning all kinds of things. He was so smart. He spent all of his down time, reading and writing. He read 100’s of books on the ambulance and whenever we were dispatched to a case that he wanted to tell his Little Tim about, he would write about it afterwards in his little black moleskine book. He loved the job so much. Working without him is going to be the most difficult thing for me. He loved to save people. At the job, we called him Super Tim. Many of you know the tough guy Tim; the war veteran who was always serious but when Tim was in his element; administering CPR on a lifeless body that started to breath again, Tim would be so emotional. He never cried but he’d talk about it for the rest of the night and if we went back to the same hospital where we took that patient, he would sneak up to visit them and see how they were doing. That kind of a call would definitely make it in the black moleskine book. Big Tim was a real-life hero; in High School, at war, and on the job and I am going to miss him terribly. Thank you for letting me share about the life of my best friend. I love you Big Tim.”

​As Samuel walked away from the podium and to his seat at the church, he began to cry. He walked over to Mrs. Walker, who he grew up calling Mrs. Jill; short for her first name, Jillian. “I’m so sorry for your loss Mrs. Jill. I will stop by your house tomorrow after work so that I can take you his things from his locker at the job”. “Thank you Sam, I better still see you at Sunday dinner boy”, Mrs. Walker said. “I wouldn’t miss those oxtails for the world Mrs. Jill”, he said.

​Then next two years would be even more difficult for Mrs. Walker and Little Tim than they thought. Without Big Tim around, Mrs. Walker’s social security check wasn’t enough to pay the mortgage and bills. Big Tim’s life insurance wouldn’t be available to Little Tim until he reached 18 years old and that was not for another 2 years. Sam kept his word, and he never missed a Sunday dinner. After dinner, Sam, Mrs. Walker, and Little Tim would go sit on the couch and Little Tim would read his father’s notes from the little black moleskine book. He would read one night’s notes every Sunday. The stories were always so heart felt. They were about young children who he had to pronounce dead on arrival and he wrote how it made him feel and how he had to remind Little Tim to wear a helmet when riding his bike. The stories weren’t all sad. Most of them were about how he saved someone’s life. Some nights, his stories were not about death or saving a life, but about a deep conversation that he and the patient got into in the back of the ambulance on their ride to the hospital. Some stories had asterisks next to them and on the bottom of the pages, he would make notes. You could tell from his writing that those were the cases that he was most connected to. There was one that read saved but not sure he’ll make it through the night and another that stood out that read, promised not to retaliate and I hope he doesn’t because he had a promising future. After reading the notes, Sam would head out to start his shift on the ambulance. He always kissed Mrs. Walker goodnight and never failed to ask “are you sure that you’re OK Mrs. Jill? Please don’t hesitate to let me know if you or Little Tim need anything”. I imagine that it was her pride that led her to say “of course Sam, we are good, thank you boy” every single time; even though she had already received notice from the Bank that she and Little Tim would have to be out of the house in 6 months.

​As the day that she would have to leave her home, got closer and closer, Mrs. Walker began to pray for a miracle. She would pray to GOD and then say “Timothy baby, I wish you were here. We need you baby. We need you to save the day”.

​Two weeks before she had to vacate the home, Sam noticed some boxes in the living room and asked her about them. She finally told him the truth and he was heartbroken. It was too late for him to come up with a plan and he didn’t have the $13,000 that she owed the bank in arrears. He began to panic and just as Mrs. Walker said “it’s ok Sam baby, Little Tim and I are going to be ok”, the doorbell rang. A gentleman in a FedEx suit was at the door and asked for Mrs. Walker. “That’s me”, she said. He handed her an envelope and told her to have a blessed day.

​This Sunday, they didn’t read one of Big Tim’s notes, but instead, Mrs. Walker read the letter aloud. It read,

​Dear Mrs. Walker, my name is Justin Perez. Seven years ago, I got jumped by a gang in my neighborhood in front of my girlfriend. There was blood everywhere and I had knots all over my head. My girlfriend panicked and called 911. The EMS that was called to the scene was your son Timothy. I was embarrassed and enraged and all I wanted to do that night was to retaliate. I was going on and on about how I was in my last year of college and had my final the day after the incident. I didn’t want to be taken to the hospital because I wanted to go get a knife and go find the men who jumped me. Your son told me that a real man would take the loss and go home and get rest for my final. He told me that he saw my potential and that he knew I would do great things in life. I told him I would go home but I don’t know if he believed I would. I wasn’t sure myself at that point. We shook hands and before the ambulance pulled off, he rolled the windows down and yelled out to me “if not for your future young man, then do the right thing so that your momma doesn’t have to bury her son”. From that moment, I decided to go home and sleep off my anger. I took my finals and went on to Banking. I never forgot his name and when I came across your foreclosure papers, I did some research. I have always wanted to find your son to thank him. I learned of his passing and I am so sorry that you had to bury your son. I truly believe that the only reason that my mother didn’t have to bury her son seven years ago was because your son’s words saved my life. Please accept this check of $20,000 to pay off the arrears and get you by until Mr. Walker’s son receives the insurance money. Sincerely, Justin Perez.

The End