The Swap

Abby shot up out of a dead sleep, heart racing. The inky blackness was immediately suffocating, but oddly, she resisted the urge to flip on the lamp. The bright green alarm clock next to her bed read 2:13 AM. Her heart was thrashing wildly as if it was desperate to work its way out of her chest.

“Now, I am breathing in,” she told herself, taking a deep shuddering inhale of oxygen. “Now I am breathing out,” as her breath hissed out between her teeth. After five more rounds of this, Abby could feel some of the adrenaline leaching out of her body, and her mind cleared. What had woken her so abruptly? Very likely it had just been a nightmare. God only knew how many nightmares she had been subjected to since early February.

As she strained her ears in the darkness, she suddenly heard something; a very faint jangling of keys coming from somewhere outside. Fear squeezed her heart, but she still managed to softly creep out of bed, tiptoe to the window and peer outside. What she saw almost made her scream; clapping a reflexive hand over her mouth, she managed a small, muffled gasp.

She could see her old, light blue car on the street below. The trunk had been flung open and someone was rummaging around. After a few seconds, the figure emerged and very gently closed the lid. Before Abby had a moment to process this terrifying turn of events, the figure had sprinted across the street, leapt into his car and driven off. As the car sped underneath the dim streetlamp, Abby could clearly see that it was a police car.

The panic Abby had felt after first being awoken, now seemed like a calm, relaxing moment, compared to the relentless waves of anxiety that were currently assaulting her. She sank down beside her window, her entire body shaking. How had he found her so quickly? She had tried to be so careful. Still, Nathan was a ten-year police veteran and she was just a middle school teacher. Of course, he would have found her. Still, a very small part of her had hoped and prayed that he simply would not have bothered with the effort; that she would have been much too insignificant. And while there was no doubt in her mind that Nathan did consider her insignificant, a sentiment that he had relentlessly conveyed to her throughout their two-year relationship, this was perhaps even more reason why he had pursued her. His ego could not handle being abandoned by someone he considered so worthless.

As all of these thoughts raced through her head, Abby felt herself begin to focus on one pressing issue; she needed to find out what Nathan had been doing in her car. Leaping off the floor, she slammed her icy feet into a pair of slippers, grabbed her keys and haphazardly groped her way across the dark apartment. Within moments, she had made her way down into her apartment complex lobby and wrenched the front door open, only to be greeted by a blast of frigid air.

Upon first glance, nothing seemed to be amiss. She kept her car relatively clean and she could see the stack of papers she needed to grade, plus some other odds and ends. Shivering violently, she pried up the floor of the trunk to access the spare tire below. As she fumbled around the metal and rubber, her fingers suddenly grazed something else. She reached her arm in further to wrap her entire hand around the object and pulled it out. Without bothering to properly examine it, she hastily slammed the trunk lid and raced back to the safety of her apartment.

Once inside, Abby finally stopped to breathe and to scrutinize the likely offensive gift that had been left for her. Hands trembling, she emptied the bag. Out fell a huge wad of money and about 5-6 tiny packets of white powder, that she instantly recognized as heroin. She thumbed through the bills; 20,000 dollars. A sudden and awful understanding swept over her. This was not some romantic attempt to woo her back, not that she had seriously thought Nathan capable of such a gesture. No, this was pure and simple revenge. Punishment for Abby having the sheer audacity to leave her abusive relationship. Nathan had become a police officer for one purpose only, and that was to be able to legally exert control and power over others. Of course, he had also enjoyed that same level of power in his intimate relationships as Abby had been unfortunate to discover. It had taken her months to build up the courage to finally leave him and she had been living in a state of perpetual fear ever since. Now, as she stared down at the tiny white packets that covered her old leather couch, Abby felt a crippling helplessness settle over her. This was Nathan’s final act of cruelty; to frame her for drug possession, sully her reputation, and ensure that she would never be able to work as a teacher again, a job he knew full well that she cherished. He meant to make her suffer and he was certainly in the position to ensure that it happened.

Even as anxiety swirled throughout her body, a new feeling was slowly beginning to take root; resolve. Her worst fear had come true, but now she had a choice. She could either give in to despair and accept her fate, or she could fight back. She was utterly terrified, but a plan, a truly reckless and impossible plan, was beginning to take shape.

She dressed hastily, trying to think through the details of the incomprehensible action she was about to take. Nathan had driven to her house in a police car, so he was likely on patrol tonight, and wouldn’t be home until around 6:30 AM. Abby glanced at the clock. It was now 2:35 AM. She had exactly 3 hours and 55 minutes to put her plan into action.

Nathan didn’t know about her discovery. She had his heroin, plus the cash. And she had knowledge of another item; a small black journal that he kept locked in his upper desk drawer. Nathan worked in Narcotics, and Abby had long suspected that he was on the take with several prominent street gangs. That small black notebook had made a number of appearances when he was in his office on important phone calls and thought Abby wasn’t paying attention. She was certain the FBI would find its contents very informative.

Nathan kept the only key to his desk drawer on his key chain; a key which Abby now fingered thoughtfully. Never in his wildest imagination would he have supposed that his timid and fearful girlfriend would have made molds of all of his keys while he was in the shower one day. At the time, Abby hadn’t even known why she had done it. She had been much too frightened of Nathan to ever actually think about turning him in to the authorities. But she had been desperate for some sort of leverage over him, even if she never used it. Now, however, those keys had opened up a new path for her; a way to save herself and get rid of Nathan once and for all.

The night was moonless, and the darkness seemed to swallow her whole as she stepped back outside. It was deathly silent in her car as she drove to her former home, her gloved hands gripping the steering wheel. Soon, much too soon, she was driving down the familiar street and slowly passing by the little grey house on the corner. A brief moment of triumph. She had been right, Nathan was not home.

Pulling a slow U-turn, Abby parked several houses away. And there she sat, simply staring, willing herself to get out of the car. The minutes slowly ticked by. The thought of Nathan catching her in his house inspired a whole new level of fear. There was a fair chance she wouldn’t make it out alive after such an encounter. Still, at most, she needed just ten minutes in the house and she could have accomplished her task two times over by this point.

Finally, with one last squeeze of the steering wheel, Abby stealthily made her way to Nathan’s front door. Her breath came in short, painful bursts as she fumbled for her copy of the front door key. Once inside, she didn’t dare turn on a light even knowing Nathan wasn’t home. She carefully felt her way towards his office, lighting the ground with only the faint glow from her phone. After reaching the desk, she attempted to open the top drawer. It was locked. This fact sent relief streaming throughout her entire body. Nathan wouldn’t bother keeping the drawer locked unless he had something to hide. Holding her breath, Abby gently slid the key into the lock and turned it sharply. She couldn’t help the grin that spread across her face as she heard that wonderful little “click,” and the drawer eased open. The journal was right where she had thought it would be. Not wanting to waste time, but wanting to make sure of her suspicions, Abby quickly leafed through its pages. After a few minutes, she clenched her fist in jubilation. Her gamble had paid off; the journal was a treasure trove of incriminating evidence, much more damaging than a few packets of heroin.

A small noise sent her diving to the floor. Heart pounding, she clutched the leg of the desk. Had Nathan come home?! No...she would have heard the front door. However, the longer she lingered on his office floor, the more likely he would come home and catch her. Jumping up, she carefully locked the desk drawer and ran down the hall to the bedroom. Stuffing the journal, heroin and (after a moment’s hesitation) cash into a small paper bag, she wedged the entire package into an obscure corner in the back of the closet. Then, as fast as possible, she ran through the house and out the front door, making sure to lock it on her way out. Despite her brain screaming at her to run, Abby forced herself to stroll nonchalantly back to her car.

Feeling as if 100 pounds had been lifted off her chest, she drove home, making one final stop at the lone payphone in the area...

6 months later

Abby threw down her red pen and groaned, clasping her hands and stretching her arms high above her head. She had been grading for a solid two hours and she needed a break. Helping herself to a glass of lemonade, she went out on her balcony and slowly sipped as she watched the orange glow of the sunset deepen into a vibrant, rich purple. Six months had passed since that fateful night; the night she had decided to take her life back.

She had spent the following day in a perpetual state of nausea, unsure if her plan had actually worked. So many things could have gone wrong. Nathan could have come home and discovered his journal missing. The FBI could have blown off her anonymous tip as a hoax. Or, they might not have searched the closet properly and completely missed the paper bag. But somehow, unbelievably, everything had worked out exactly as it was supposed to. Nathan had been arrested the following day. After a lot of deliberation, Abby had decided to testify at his trial. It had been a relief to finally unburden herself of the wretched memories that she had kept secret for so long. Nathan had been convicted and sentenced to 10 years in prison.

Abby sighed and breathed in the crisp, night air. Nathan would get out one day, but she would simply meet that day when it came. She would live in fear no longer.