My mom pursuit me in a judicial trial

You have probably once heard the famous phrase "the person who loves you most in the world is your mother". Mine initiate legal proceedings against me accusing me of being crazy.

Maybe she was right... But one thing is sure: If I was’nt already, I certainly became crazy after that.

The scene was unreal. My mother enters the trial room, a lawyer by her side, looking at me like I was the 7th most dangerous criminals in the world.

I was sitting, calmly and silently, at the end of a long dark wood table, reading a spanish book next to my cup of tea. I was wearing a quilt high over my head, like a gladiator ready for a battle. The most absurd fight that exist: proving my innocence for a crime that is not even in the criminal code.

There was a security guard armed with a weapon a meter behind me. He raised his tone a notch when I stepped back from my chair to fill my empty cup with water:

Dont move!

My body tensed. I put my cup back on the table in slow motion. I caught myself thinking, for a second, that I was maybe really dangerous to be treated like none other than Bonnie Parker. But than, I remembered that my cup wasn’t an explosive device and that the water I was prepared to pour into wasn’t some heavy metal destined to murder all living beings in these places.

I took a long breath.

Is drinking water a crime now? Because I seriously start to question the safety of citizens.

The gardian stepped back, still looking at me with an unexplicable mistrust.

I felt like one of the witches of salem, accused of witchcraft, for leaving alone, even if there was not black cat around.

I said to myself with a repressed hilarity that I would soon be sanctanced to death for having the audacity to hydrate myself in that arid places of good sense.

A very serious silence reigned in the room. I wanted to burst out laughing.

I was lost in my mind when I heard:

SWEAR TO TELL THE TRUTH AND ONLY THE TRUTH!

Than, my mother went on with her first proof:

« Once, I went to her house and I saw her, from the window, with a big knife in her hand! »

Yeah, I was cooking.

The judge, impassive, leaned down to take notes, without even tensing any muscle in his face. She continued:

« She has blemish skin! That reveal of her unstable condition. She is surely not healthy. She need to see a doctor. »

Is’nt it my natural skin color, mom? I am a blue eyed light hair girl.

The journey went like this for a while. Like in a game of ping pong, I replied with a logical explanation to each of her proofs, without downtime, to defend me of my dreadful crime. More the process was advancing, more her lawyer was puzzled. But my mother had more than one string in her bow...

« She speak to herself and have several personalities! »

I faked an expression of surprise, like a multi-repeat criminal offender who gets caught for the first time.

She continued, even more convinced.

« She can be a soldier, a goldfish and even... Satan in person! What will we do if she hurts someone? »

Have you ever heard about theater?

« And what about the crazy cat? » She claimed, with a hint of anger

Another of my split personnality, I suppose!

I whispered.

At this point, I was no longer defending myself, tired of the absurdity of the turn of this masquerade.

As a last resort, she screemed that my internment was for my own good, because I would end up in the streets.

She failed to say that there was a vacant room in her apartment, reserved for her cats. Ironically, one of my personalities, according to her, was supposedly a « crazy cat ». Maybe she didn't wanted me as a girl, but as a cat?!

Would’nt it have been more simple to just say you missed me around you mom?

The craziest part of the day, I think, is what happened right after the trial.

I was free to go, obviously, because the charge haven’t been retained. So, I left the room. My mom joins me with enthusiastic eagernesslooked and, with sparkles in her eyes like I was the 7th world’s wonder, she asked me to go with her for a brunch.

I nodded, and we went for that brunch.

You are right mom.

I am crazy.