Author's Note: This is part three in a series. Please start with the Macabre Life of Daisy jones. Part Two is The Grisly, Gory Details of Mazie May Warren's Double Life.
Mazie awakes with a start. Her night went black again. She thinks to herself she doesn't know how much time she loses to the darkness, let alone what takes place. She has a pretty good clue of what takes place - there is usually a stranger in her bed that looked much better the night before when she had on her beer goggles. This is the problem with being an addict. The meth takes gets her high, the liquor and her cornacopia of pills slows her down, but not enough to sleep. Its Sunday morning - she decides to grab a cigarette and a beer - if she can find one. She realizes once again she doesn't know where she is.
She rolls over. The room so white it reminds Mazie of the psych ward. It's all coming back to her now. She is celebrating her 40th birthday with her father and her best friend. She can tell she didn't sleep with anyone; none of the usual clues are there. She is alone - in her very quaint, stark white room that her father rented her at a Bed and Breakfast on South Bass off the coast of Lake Erie.
She often thinks of the islands, that are dominated by amateur drunks, to be a poor man's resort. Mazie is a teacher is an affluent town, with all of the material items and credit card debt too match. Her condo on the coast of Lake Erie is the perfect weekend get away, but she is too much of a snob, and developing into too much of a drunk to appreciate the beauty of the islands, its glacial grooves, sandy white beaches, and yachts that are in front of her eyes.
Still on the blurry edge of a hangover, she looks around again. There are two very small twin size beds, with a very dated look to the room. As its a Bed and Breakfast, there is no TV, no coffee maker. Its actually a very peaceful morning.
This is before the bi-polar explosion. In a few short years, her brain will be having 52 conversations at once. Her thoughts will be flying away from her like post-it notes in the wind. There is no darkness in her soul as of yet. It hasn't ever occured to her kill somone, let alone a cop. The bi-polar time bomb had not yet went off. This gene was lurking in her DNA and she didn't even know it.
In less than four years from now, she won't be able to live outside a hospital for the criminally insane without her medication.
While Mazie May is a married woman, her and husband are separated at this time. The duality of her personality is just now beginning to show. Both Mazie and her husband are in denial. Mazie, deep down, did not want to saddled with the inconveniences of a relationship. Her husband knows this deep down, that she is a party girl. He fell in love with the Mazie that was a PhD candidate. Not the local bar fly.
Her husband and her were very much in love at one point time, but that time has passed. The love fading as incrementally as a tide flowing out to sea. Unfortunately, as the love faded, the drinking grew into a monster.
Once a casual social drinker, she now couldn't keep track of her drinks. Three became five, five became seven, and those are on the nights she even bothered to count.
Mazie is assessing things at the rest area. She can't let her grandmother down, that she knows too well before she is even fully awake. Yesterday she picked up an Amish girl at the bar.
Oh shit! That's right - the girl died from an overdose when the hook up went to far. She's more hungover than she thought.
Mazie is also realizing that she feels no remorse at all. She was once so compassionate, but now the feels like becoming the grim reaper. No remorse too be found anywhere. In fact, she's a little more than mildly irritated that she was high because she doesn't remember her first kill.
Thats how the cops will view it - she provided crystal meth to a young adult who ultmately died. The Amish girls death is on her hands.
One thing she knows is true is that she will be able to talk her way out of this out this one. Her husband is a cop. If she is not careful she will be shot here and now it will be game over. The situation could go either way. Like Jeklll and Hyde, it depends which Mazie May shows up.
Time seems to be standing still. The cops are there. But do they know anything? It does not appear so. THANK GOD, Mazie thinks to herself.
She is so wound up that her speech is rapid and pressured to the point that Mazie can talk for five minutes with out giving you two seconds of information, so irrational, nonsensical, that she doesn't know what she is saying until after she says it.
Time to get out of here Mazie. She does remember that before things went blank she thought, "its time for a kill."
Mazie is in her head too much. Daisy at least paid attention to the big picture - she was anti-establishment and an avid reader. She was always looking out for Mazie. When she wasn't drinking and drugging. Mazie's descent into alcoholism is unavoidable really. Three out of four of her grandparents were alcoholics as well as both her parents. No matter much she punishes herself, the rock bottoms were both predictable and predestined.
Mazie and her husband have an arrangement. She doesn't ask where he's been sleeping and he doesn't question her smile.
Her soul is now dark, its black, she doesn't think it go can back. She knows that her husband isn't the one.
That's how Mazie started her life of crime - so innocent. Well not THAT innocent, she was having one stands while she was married. Somehow, this lead to addiction, lead to a complete total shambles of a life.
But I'm getting ahead of myself again.
She wakes up to her final rock bottom. There is blood everywhere. She is definitely going to jail. She remembers her grandmothers journal, die before being found out. She is looking desperately for anything that will help her commit suicide. No way is she living the rest of her life in jail. She honestly doesn't know how many people she has killed at this point. Probably three digits. She was the perfect stranger. Mazie only killed strangers. The Mazie the neighborhood saw was a near-perfect wife. Her alter ego is still very hidden from the world.
Mazie's problem in a nutshell is that she falls in love too easily, she loves with all her heart, as much as she can, but then, like a switch, her emotions turn off.
Mazie thinks to herself that all she ever wanted was to be a housewife. In truth, she loves being domesticated. She loves all of it.
She thinks that marriage is misunderstood. People act like it is a death sentence but it supposed to be freedom.
Freedom to be her true authentic self. She is terribly awkward around people. But once she warms up, it's all over with. She will talk your ear off.
Freedom from sexual assault.
Freedom from chaos - on a path towards order. Freedom from lies (but he always knows when she lies).
Freedom from embarassment over sexual urges.
Freedom from guilt and freedom from shame.
Freedom from hell. Damn, she hates being Catholic.
How did my marriage fail exactly? The road to hell is paved with good intention she thinks.
Yes I fall in too love to easily she thinks. But no one ever died of a broken heart? Is that an old wives tale that you can die from a broken heart? Her loneliness at time is crushing and physically painful. She finds solace in crowds even when they make her feel empty.
She thinks of her husband. When they were in love, he would run his hand down her back, kiss her sweetly, and grab her hips. She will remember vividly for the rest of her life how intense the passion was in the beginning. His touch felt electric on her skin.
The irony that there is blood and bodies underneath a Christmas tree is not lost on Mazie. She humorously thinks to herself, well that escalated quickly. This wouldn't have happened to Daisy, she knows that much is true. Daisy still lived in reality though. Mazie didn't.
To be continued.....
About the Creator
I am an aspiring writer currently writing a book on the Sober Revolution we are in the midst of, a book about essays that will change the way you think, and a novel about a serial killer. I am also working on a book of poetry.