Crimes of Thought

Logan was supposed to meet me at the station an hour ago. Where could he be? He’d better not be planning anything stupid. I would imagine after last time, he would know better. Whatever. Hopefully he shows up soon, or I’ll have to let Conrad know. Come on, Logan. Don’t be a fool.

A branch snaps behind me. Could it be? Did he make it? We don’t have much time, he knows that. A familiar smell envelops me, and I wake up, hands tied behind my back.

“You know where you are.” Of course I do. “The station,” he explains, “was a ruse.” I thought so. I had to take my chances, though. “Your friend, Logan. Do you know who he is?” Yes, of course. Now I do. “He knows more about you than you could possibly imagine. More than you know about yourself, I’d add.” Everything is falling into place. I am where I need to be. The station doesn’t matter anymore, this is the new plan.

“I have a few questions for you. Don’t worry, this won’t hurt.” There’s that smell again. Chloroform. It doesn’t matter what they do to me, they won’t find anything out they don’t already know. I wake up again, hands untied. Logan speaks.

“I’m sorry, man. This whole time, I was playing you. We needed to get to the bottom of an investigation, and you were the only one who could help us.” As certain I am that he’s lying, I’m eager to hear more. “Your thoughts are pure. I know this for a fact. We’ve been watching you for a long time. Ours…aren’t. This is why we need you.” A mask. They’re turning me into a mask. “Yes, that’s one way to put it. Now, get comfortable. This will take a while.” I close my eyes, and smile. This is it.

“Conrad, the man you have been reporting to, is an overseer,” Logan begins, “as am I. which means we can read the thoughts of those in close proximity to us. This is why we trust you, and this is why your distrust in us has been warranted. I assure you the following: you are safe, but I cannot promise that Conrad is. We have received intel that somebody is planning to reduce him to nothingness, due to a past…scuffle, we can call it, between the two of them. Conrad made his role as overseer known, by accident, and the suspect in question was not happy with it. As you know, being an overseer in and of itself is a crime of thought in today’s world. Conrad knew that while pointing out the suspect’s own thought crimes.”

Crimes of thought? Even just speaking those words out loud constitutes a transgression…doesn’t it? “Yes, that is true. However, our needs are dire and we must skip to the point. When all this is over, transgressions will be rendered moot, and Conrad will be saved, if all goes well.”

“Fine, then. I am ready to hear more.”

“Good. Let us get started.”

———

He explained to me the following. In this world, there are certain thoughts that are deemed unacceptable by the ruling class. In order to enforce this, the ruling class had to engage in an unethical procedure, one that granted a select few the power to read minds, in order to peer into individuals’ thoughts and pluck out the ones who engaged in impure pondering. What they did not know was that these overseers, as they are called, would turn their backs onto their rulers.

Designated as police of the metaphysical realm, the overseers decided it was in their best interest, and in that of the people, not to conform to the strict guidelines they were given. In response to this, most of the overseers were taken down. Within hours of the first overseer fighting back, half of them had already been rendered powerless.

Soon after, the government decided they had made a fatal mistake, and all remaining overseers, including Conrad, were deemed criminals. It is only a matter of time before Conrad makes himself known, and the suspect in question is trying to make sure that this happens.

Logan also explained to me the reasoning behind restricting mention of thought crimes. The governing agents don’t want anybody to be aware of the overseers’ power to read their minds. They were destined to stay undercover, to optimize their ability to detect crimes of thought.

The meeting at the station was designed to gain my trust. They needed to fabricate a reason for us to work together, to test my motives and gauge my reliability. I guess since I didn’t have much to lose, they chose to approach me and take me on board. I had taken every mission thus far seriously as if my life depended on it, because in some ways, it did.

Now they are sending me into the field, as their bulletproof vest. We all know the remaining overseers are still out there, some bearing vindictive motive toward anyone who is clouding their mind with rotten thoughts. That constitutes most people nowadays, but this is why they need me; my thoughts are “pure”, as they called them. Therefore, the valence of my innocence is enough to mask their own while they peruse the environment to get ahold of their suspect. What they do not know, though…

“You’d better stop thinking that,” Logan exclaims. "If you want to foil the plan, go ahead and say what you’re going to say, but I suggest you remain quiet, at least until the end of this operation.” The strength of his voice has always kept me on my toes. This time is no different.

“Carn, you already know everything you need to know. I think it’s time we take a stab at this.” I can’t help but agree. Let’s do this.

———

The air is damp. Logan walks to my left, Conrad to my right. I feel a sense of self-importance, walking with these high profile characters. “Don’t let it get to your head, kid,” they whisper simultaneously. At once, we part ways in an equilateral triangle, keeping our mutual mental influence frozen. It is essential that we remain equidistant, so that our suspect isn’t able to interfere with the lattice of our thoughts. Since both Conrad and Logan are overseers, they know my every move ahead of time. Anything I do that’s not according to plan would be anticipated, so there’s nothing I could do to escape. Not that I’d want to. This is what I need to do, where I need to be.

The plan is simple. I walk north, Logan and Conrad West and East, respectively. In order to retain our form, I am required to walk slightly faster than the both of them. At some point in the process, our suspect will cross between two of us, and though we do not know his face, he will make himself known as he glances at Conrad and thinks, “There he is. I’ve got him.” Luckily, he isn’t stupid enough to attack on sight. He’s got a plan, too. He is, though, dumb enough to think that an overseer, let alone two, would let such a thought go unseen.

The risk in this scenario is great. There are a handful of overseers still working for the ruling class: the ones who chose to stay. These people were rendered more powerful in their gift. They can anticipate thought transgressions before they even happen, and from anywhere. This is where I come in. Allegedly, my mind is innocent and powerful enough to cloud the thoughts of both Logan and Conrad, assuming we remain in our equilateral triangle formation. This way, Logan and Conrad can take care of the suspect while I act as a decoy, a metaphysical sponge.

“You know what means, right? You’ll be taken.” Yes, I know. I’m doing this for the both of you, out of respect for what you’ve done and where you’ve led me. “Carn. You know this is the end of you.” You don’t know that. You don’t know…

My thought is interrupted as we hear the phrase we’ve been expecting. “I’ve got him.” It’s time. I concentrate all my energy onto my forehead, feeling the aura of everyone around me be absorbed into my mind. Most importantly, I feel Logan and Conrad’s minds merge and be housed in my own. The remaining overseers are out there, but for all they know, I am the one committing the prime transgression of telepathy. Our lattice formation, uninterrupted, yields the power we were expecting. I close my eyes.

At once, I hear it all. “Don’t go there!” “What have you done…” “This is the end of you, you know.” “There’s no turning back.” I have no idea who’s saying what. All I know is I have to keep my focus on my skull, while I act as a lightning rod to the thoughts of these two overseers. I raise both my arms slowly, and I feel my feet lifting from the ground. Solace is all that I feel as the thoughts flow in. “You’re done. This is it. You’re mine. Away you go.”

Like a God, I brush off the stray thoughts and focus on the warmth emanating from my brow. This really is it. I’ve done it. I’ve become an overseer. My eyes snap open, and I run. “CARN!” Shut up, Logan. Get lost. This is it, I’ve done it. “Carn, I swear to you if…”

I feel a clap on my back, and I fall through the concrete floor. “Where… where are you taking me?” I ask with a smile. There’s no turning back. This is the end. I’ve done it.

———

Logan and Conrad are far gone. The only person I’ve yet to face is you… Fracton.

“I’m impressed. You followed through. You know how foolish that was.”

Yes. I know.

“You’ve committed the prime transgression. As such, you know what must be done.”

This is the end of me, I know.

“All I can do is congratulate you. Years of being stuck hasn’t taught you anything, has it.”

Don’t go there, Fracton. Don’t you know this is the plan?

“The plan? I dictate the plan! There is nothing you could do that transcends what I expect from you.”

Then what about this? Even through closed eyes, I see the room’s light form a sphere in its center. You’re done, Fracton.

“Carn? Back down. It’s done.”

You’ll disappear soon, with me. It really will be done.

As the light grows in size, the thoughts grow louder. “Don’t do it. It’s not worth it.”

Logan and Conrad scream from a distance. “You’ve found him. We knew you could do it. Now finish it.”

I…I can’t. I’ve seen too much. I don’t think there’s any going back now. “Very good, Carn. I knew you couldn’t pull the trigger.”

That’s why…that’s why I must take your place, Fracton. “CARN!” Yes, that’s right. All I see, all I’ve known…it’s all led me to this very place. Won’t you want to trade places, Fracton? You can have a taste of life as a measly human and I can be the prime overseer. “Oh, you foolish little gnat.” I’ve seen it all already. “This is just a glimpse. You don’t have it in you.” Oh, yes I do. Watch.

———

I wake up to the smell of acetone and cyanide. “Which will you choose?” I don’t need to choose. I’ve seen it all. “You’re done. This is it. You’ve done it.” L…Logan? Conrad? “Yes. You’ve dismantled our suspect’s powers. He is no longer a threat.”

How? I thought this would be more difficult. Didn’t I give in to my hunger for power? “Yes, Carn, but that’s exactly what got to him. This is why we needed you. We couldn’t have done it ourselves, because we’ve seen what being an overseer does to us. You…without the knowledge of its ramifications, the power was alluring to you. We needed to make sure you wanted to foil the plan by wanting its power.”

So that means… “Fracton? He’s long gone. Ran away.” But… “Conrad is safe now. There’s nothing more that needs to be done. Congratulations. You can go home. We will reach out when we need you.”

A splitting headache inhibits my thoughts and speech. “It’s okay. We know the anguish you are going through. We’ve gone through it ourselves. It’s a rite of passage. Some day maybe we can teach you to be an overseer, but for now, get some rest.” Logan and Conrad anxiously exchange a glance. Come on, one more time…

“One more time? Oh…. Carn. You can’t be serious.”

“I am,” I calmly say. “Per the rule of law, you and your friend Conrad are under arrest for offering to teach the way of the overseer.”

“You…”

“Yes, Logan. You thought you played me- I played you. Now, both of you will come with me, I’ve got a lot of questions for you. Don’t worry, it won’t hurt. Just know that your days of being overseers are over.”

“My god. You’ve really done it.”

My god, I really have.